Twilight galloped home, her newly-borrowed book barely staying within her telekinetic grasp.
Tears streamed from the purple fillies eyes. She imagined that they caught in the wind and followed behind her, but nothing that dramatic would really happen.
But regarding things that actually did happen ... She slowed down to a trot as she neared the safe security of home. She sniffled lightly, wanting to rub the tears from her eyes, but she wasn't willing to pause in her forward momentum. If she did, she might fall to the ground and sob like a foal.
Or maybe it might be something worse.
A shudder ran through her as her thoughts turned from the betrayal of her friends, to why they had reacted like they did. She had done something incomprehensible at her entrance exam. Something extraordinary – and not in a good way. She had been so excited about what had happened in the aftermath of her explosive outburst that she hadn't spared even a thought for the consequences of the scenario she had been responsible for.
Pondering her memory of the event, she thought more closely on the movements of her examiners. They'd been nervous. Fully grown mares and stallions, experienced in the use and observation of magic, had been afraid of a filly. And her parents ...
Twilight stopped short, a mere ten steps from her front door. The book lowered towards the ground as her magical hold faltered. The downward momentum of such a precious item pulled her out of her thoughts. Her parents didn't think she was a monster. They didn't, they didn't, they didn't, they didn't.
She repeated the mantra over and over in her mind as she wiped the moisture from her eyes and took a deep breath. She wasn't upset. She resumed her walk to the door. This day was a happy day. She'd studied in the Royal Canterlot library, she'd had her first lesson with Celestia ... The thought wasn't enough to stop her as she reached her hoof for the door handle, but it was enough to give her pause. Why had the princess taken on a personal student?
She didn't have time to dwell on the thought, as she was greeted at the door by her parents. They herded her into the kitchen and placed snacks in front of her. It was then that Twilight remembered she hadn't stopped her studies for lunch. But that didn't matter too much as she happily recounted her day to mother and father, eagerly hanging on her every word about her time with the princess.
Celestia was up before the sun, as usual. When one was the only pony in all of Equestria responsible for the morning actually coming, one had to make sure she was prepared early. This particular morning, as with the last, she had something new to occupy the thoughts that came with her daily routine: one Twilight Sparkle.
It was unusual for her to take a personal interest in the education of a filly, and because she had presented the offer in front of the board of examiners she had assigned for applications to her school, the news had already spread. It had been a long time since Celestia had met a young pony with so much magical potential, so maybe she had been a little too excitable when giving the proposal. With such volatile energies, it wasn't in her best interests for Twilight to be in the spotlight so quickly. It would have been prudent to have waited until she was alone with the family before suggesting such a thing.
But there was no real point to dwelling on the past. As with all the mistakes of her life, Celestia pushed it to the side of her mind. It was important to learn from mistakes, but it was more important to continue moving forward.
And forward was certainly the way things were moving. Because of the mistake of letting Twilight Sparkle's new position out in the open so quickly, Celestia was forced to structure her lessons subtly. The main lesson of the day for the young pony would be to march up to the castle, declare herself as here to see the princess, and approach without fear. A student of hers would need to be able to move freely throughout the castle, after all.
Celestia had to admit, she was excited. It had been many years since she had taken on a personal student, but she always found the experience to be fulfilling and interesting. There was much one could learn from the experience of being a personal tutor, and the close bond teacher and student would form always gave her fond memories of when she had a younger sibling to teach and watch grow into a mature pony.
Luna.
The princess kept her lost sister out of her thoughts as much as possible. Anypony suffering from the loss of a beloved family member would find it difficult to think of anything else, but as ruler, Celestia could not give too much time to selfish thoughts and regrets. Always at the back of her mind, though, was the year count, and the thousand year mark was, as always, drawing ever closer.
Her connection with the sun pressed on the edges of her awareness, drawing the princess out of her reflections. It was a new day, as ever, and she would keep moving forward.
The hesitant knock on her chamber door could only be her new student, and while under normal circumstances, Celestia would casually take her time in answering, she rushed to the door to let the poor filly in. She would no doubt be overwhelmed by the harrowing journey through the castle.
Sure enough, Twilight Sparkle stood cowering outside the door, flanked by two royal guards who made the purple pony look even smaller than she was.
Celestia dismissed the guards with a nod and led the young pony into her chambers. The poor dear was shivering ever so slightly, which Celestia had expected from her ordeal.
"Would you like some tea?" she asked to soothe her nervous student.
Twilight simply nodded, and Celestia directed her to a small table she'd set up for entertaining guests before moving into her small kitchenette. She was sure that castle staff would be more than happy to make her tea whenever she needed it – when she'd explained what she was doing that morning, they had certainly offered – but she often grew weary of being constantly waited on.
She'd just placed the tea leaves in the pot and brought the water to boil when she sensed a presence behind her in the doorway.
Twilight Sparkle had felt uneasy ever since she had first set out to the castle that morning. The thought that she was dangerous spiraled around and around in her mind, and she couldn't shake it. Celestia said she had never seen a filly with such raw power. Enough power to destroy things? If she lost control again ...
The trip through the castle was harrowing. Twilight felt eyes upon her as she made her way to the entrance of the castle – the wary eyes of the guards looking out for danger.
As she had been instructed, she announced herself as there to see the princess, and two guards had led her into the building.
It was then that she felt other stares, heard whispers.
"... Celestia's protégé ..."
"... exam hall ceiling ..."
Twilight purposely avoided looking at any of the ponies she passed, cringing inwardly and outwardly as she trotted between royal guards through stone hallways filled with tapestries and sculptures. The atmosphere of the castle seemed to be cheerful, but it was making her feel the opposite.
The princess had been warm and inviting. She did what she could to put Twilight at ease, but none of her kind words and looks worked on her distressed mind.
When princess Celestia offered to get them tea, Twilight waited at the small table for only a minute before following her mentor.
She wanted to speak so badly, but the sight of the majestic alicorn using her magic to put leaves in a teapot was just too overwhelming.
Celestia seemed to know she was there, as she turned with another kindly smile, beckoning Twilight forward.
Twilight obliged, keeping low, but Celestia knelt down to bring herself closer, her body pressing to Twilight's side in a gesture of comfort. Twilight only felt worse for having royalty crouching on the floor beside her. She said nothing.
"Speak your mind, Twilight Sparkle. This is a safe place to voice your concerns." The princess looked into her eyes.
Twilight took a deep breath, catching the princess's scent of some kind of exotic flower, before stammering out her question. "Am I ... Am I a monster?"
Celestia looked surprised at the question. She had clearly not expected Twilight to work it out.
"Twilight! Why would you think such a thing?" The larger pony shifted as if to get to her feet, but she stopped and only pressed closer to Twilight.
Now Twilight wanted to get her words out as quickly as possible. "Did you take me on as your protégé because you need to watch to make sure ... make sure I don't ... destroy things again?"
"Who told you such a thing?" she asked gently.
"No one. I just ... I just ..." Twilight finally released the burning tears pricking her eyes . "My friends, they ... my family too ... and those teachers from your school ..." Her head lowered with every word. "They're all scared of me," she whispered.
"I was afraid this might happen," Celestia sighed. "I'm sorry, my little pony. I'm so sorry that you have to go through such a trial. If I had known of your power earlier, I could have–"
"So I am a monster?" Twilight only realised she had dropped down so that her when she felt the cool tile of the floor beneath her belly.
Celestia followed her down, settling beside her so she could nuzzle the side of her face. "Oh, by the heavens no, little filly! Don't you ever think that!"
Twilight felt guilty for allowing royalty to be amongst the dirt of the floor and moved to stand up again, knowing she had no right to get such comfort from the princess who ruled Equestria, but the feathery touch of an outstretched wing above her back stopped her.
"Twilight Sparkle," Princess Celestia used her wing tip to make the young pony look back into her eyes. "Listen to me carefully: there is nothing wrong with you. You have exceptional magical talent, and some ponies will not understand that and be afraid. There are ponies who are afraid of me, after all."
"Princess! Who would be–"
Celestia silenced her with a raised hoof. "I didn't mean to talk about myself. "Your only solution, my young student, is to study hard, and I already know that a pony as talented as you can do this. When ponies see that your magic is completely under your control, they will have nothing to fear."
Twilight's tears began to flow in relief. "So I won't go out of control again?"
The kettle started to whistle as the water boiled. Celestia looked up, then down Twilight with a smile in her eyes. "I have faith that you will become as great at magic as myself."
Beautiful chapter. I can feel Twilights pain and loneliness.
Poor little filly. No wonder her only friends were Spike, Cadance, Shining and Celestia.
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I finally earned my 'sad' tag. I was kinda worried I was gonna drag the lighthearted thing on forever. It's more difficult to write a sad MLP fanfiction than I thought it would be.
Very good chapter. Possibly the best yet. A very realistic reaction form Twilight and you brought out the emotions well. And yes, longer chapters definitely suit this story's pacing. Personally I think the ideal chapter length is just shy of 3000 words, but of course, one should never write to such arbitrary conditions. Unless that's the point.
This chapter was very easy to read. And I mean "easy" as in "pleasing", not "simple". Just two mistakes that I spotted:
"Twilight only realised she had dropped down so that her when she felt the cool tile of the floor beneath her belly." -> Something is missing here.
"I didn't mean to talk about myself. "Your only solution" -> Just a stray quote mark.
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Lol. I think that sentence that was 'missing something' was just written incorrectly. I wrote it in Twilights, POV first, before I'd written Celestia's part, then I was continuing with Celestia's POV and thought it would actually be better if I kept it as Twilight. And that was the exact sentence when I made that decision, mid-re-write.
Gonna have to think about that sentence again.
As for chapter length, as much as I would like to make them longer, I just don't work hard enough on the story. There's so much expanding to be done, and as I've said in reply to someone's comments before, a lot of my descriptions come in much later re-writes
And I should point out that I don't mean I don't try. I am proud of this story, I'm just very aware of my personal limitations, and it would take me months to write this to the standard I would ideally like to.
Thanks for finding errors and pointing them out.
I decided to check out your story. From what I see, it is kind of an update of the story Twilight told of her cutie mark in "The Cutie Mark Chronicles". It's a good concept I think. To be honest, I liked the inclusion of Shining Armor in the story. When I first saw the episode, I came to the conclusion that she was an only child. But now reading this, I could easily see Shining Armor going along with his sister to see it. I think you demonstrated their bond well. Although, I think they should have just called their parents "Mom" and "Dad". Mother and Father seems too formal for them. I just couldn't picture that word coming from their mouths. But that is just me.
As for the grammar, I'm not sure if it was good or bad. Honestly I see I am not the best at grammar and several aspects escape me. Sorry I couldn't be of more help. Now I'm starting to see as fellow writers we should probably help each other out and I should have taken your advice more respectively, especially seeing as you know what you are talking about. But I was able to get through and understand the chapters. For me that is enough for a story.
If I ever get around to it, I will read the other chapters, maybe learn a thing or two by reading it.
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Haha. I've never needed help with grammar, so it's all good. The only problems with my story should be typos and a lack of in-depth descriptions.
This story is not so much a re-telling as a filling-in-the-gaps of Twilight's life. But yeah, the first chapter was kinda just because I thought Shining needed to be added into her story (The last episode of season two had me staring at the screen, and I said aloud "Twilight has a brother?" I call it the 'surprise brother' moment. Lol).
And I totally agree on the mother father thing. I facepalmed at my decision later on.
I'm glad you've decided that writers should help each other out too I'm sure a lot of writers can benefit from your experience if you choose to share it with them.
1614214Well maybe I can learn something from you.
Not sure how much experience I would be able to share, but I'd be happy to help.
You know? I had the idea that all ponies held a form of magic inside them, what with pegasi controlling the weather and earth ponies having a connection with the land, except it was more inert while unicorns can manifest it freely through their horns. I'm glad I'm not the only one who views it like that, and I am rather pleasantly surprised it showed up in writing form. That will actually support an idea I have in a future fic idea. Well anyway, I liked the introduction of Cadance. Although I wonder if Twilight's parents are among the Canterlot elite seeing as they have a princess as their babysitter? Well anyway keep up the good work.
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I'm pretty sure that the idea of all ponies having an inherent kind of magic was first started by Lauren Faust herself so I can't take credit for the idea. But there are some things that lend credence to the idea. Like the fact that Twilight could use a spell to help ponies walk on clouds like pegasi (so their walking on clouds could be a natural form of magic in itself) and no one else seems to be able to grow food other than the earth ponies (everyone else has anti-plant-growing magic? Lol.)
And Cadance being Twilight's foalsitter is something that will always be a mystery, I suppose. Did she do it a lot? Was it some kind of princess training to get to know the people? Why didn't prince Blueblood have to do a similar thing to stop him from being so stuck up?
Really enjoying this story.
Celestia is both on the right and wrong path here.