My Little Pony Friendship is Magic The Movie: What If?

by SuperPinkBrony12

Part 5: Welcome to Klugetown

The journey beyond Equestria's southern border took the six ponies and dragon through a vast desert wasteland that seemed to stretch on miles. There was nothing to be seen anywhere, except for sand and scorching sun.

Naturally, the dry desert heat took a tole on all as they trekked through it. Beads of sweat trickled down the faces of the group, as the hot sand stung at their hooves (and feet in Spike's case).

"Are we there yet?!" Rarity audibly whined in between harsh pants. "We've been walking for so long, I've got sand in my... well... everything!"

"We just have to keep going!" Twilight insisted even as she too was suffering from the heat.

Applejack started to pant, even briefly taking off her stetson to fan her face in the hopes of cooling down just a little bit. "Listen, sugarcube, I'm startin' to think we should just turn back now. Whoever this... Queen Novo is, she may not be worth us pushin' ourselves to the point of collapse, especially if we have to go back across this desert."

Pinkie Pie gave off a nervous smile and a laugh as she held up a skull. "Hey, it's not all bad. I've made a new friend! Look!" When there was nothing but silence, she added. "He's not much of a talker."

Twilight would hear nothing of such arguments. "We're not turning back! We've come this far already! Everypony's counting on us! We have to find this Queen Novo, we just have to!"

Then, in the distance, Rainbow thought she could just make out the faint outline of something. She squinted hard, blinking and rubbing her eyes. "Is that a mirage?" She questioned as she gestured a hoof.

The eyes of the others all fell upon the distant object that had caught Rainbow Dash's attention. It was far away, but it seemed to slowly be coming into focus better with every step they took. Fluttershy hopefully commented. "If it is a mirage, it's a really good one, because I'm seeing it too!"

Pinkie Pie, meanwhile, began to bounce up and down as she excitedly exclaimed! "It's not a mirage! I can see it clear as day! It's a city! We've found civilization!"

"About time!" Spike exclaimed with relief. "I don't think I have much strength left in me to do anything. If nothing else, at least we should be able to find shade and shelter. I could use a rest."

Rarity nodded in agreement as she got a starry look in her eyes! "And you know what they say: Where there's a city, there's a spa!"

Applejack shot a quirked brow at her fashion friend. "Really? Who ever says that?"

Rarity frowned. "You know what I meant! I for one could really do with some pampering right about now!"

So the group walked a little further, the town slowly but surely coming into view fully. In contrast to the bright and colorful cities and towns in Equestria, however, this town looked to be very drab. All its buildings were shades of earthly greys and browns, and all looked to be made of sandstone and bricks. The buildings were so tall that they blocked out almost all natural light, giving the landscape an ominous and gloomy dark brown color to it.

Fluttershy nervously saw fit to ask the nagging question lingering in the back of everyone's minds. "What is this place?"

Twilight halted at the town's edge, her attention drawn to a small sign attached to a wooden post. She read it aloud. "Klugetown."

The fashionista unicorn grimmaced, her lips contorting into a frown. "What an unattractive and unappealing name. Although, it certainly seems fitting given how... run down it seems to be."

Rainbow Dash chimed in. "Tell me about it. This place is a real eyesore, and I've seen my fair share of eyesores!"

The young alicorn decided. "Well, for better or for worse, it's civilization. Let's just hope the locals are in a welcoming mood," And she instructed to the others. "Stay close to me. We're not in Equestria anymore, not telling what we might run into." Then she and her friends, along with Spike, made their way into Klugetown proper.

---

The ponies and dragon had not been trotting along for long before they came upon a series of dusty, neglected market stands. They were all occupied by these rather unusual bi-pedal creatures that looked like various animals on land and sea. And all of their eyes quickly seemed to be drawn to the newcomers in their midst, their glares staring down at the ponies and the little dragon with seemingly hostile intent.

Fluttershy, though usually quite fond of animals, found herself frightened and on edge just by looking at the residents of Klugetown. And to make matters worse, certain odors eminating from them were making themselves very well known to her nose. "Oh my!" She exclaimed as she held her nose with a hoof. "When's the last time these creatures had a bath?" She whispered.

"Forget what I said about a spa," Rarity whispered back. "Something tells me these creatures would be lucky to have any sort of indoor plumbing."

And Applejack was turning to Twilight as she asked. "Ya sure it was a good idea to come all this way, Twilight? This place is givin' me the creeps." And she shuddered quite visibly.

"One thing's for sure," Twilight decided then and there. "This place doesn't exactly look friendly and welcoming. I doubt any of these creatures know anything about a Queen Novo or where we could find her. I think it's best if we just move on and try our luck elsewhere."

Pinkie Pie wasn't so convinced of that idea. "How do we know for sure these creatures can't help us? We haven't even talked to them yet! Don't forget, we've been outside Equestria before, and made friends with lots of other creatures. We're even friends with the spirit of chaos and disharmony for pony's sake!" She beamed, happily insisting with a wave of her hoof. "If we can befriend him, we can definitely make friends with these new creatures. We just need to get to know them a little better. And I'm just the pony to do it!"

"Pinkie, no, don't!" The young alicorn protested! But it was too late, she could only watch with dismay and disbelief as her pink party planning friend pranced happily towards one of the bi-pedal fish creatures.

The fish creature spun around, finding himself face to face with Pinkie Pie. "Whaddya want?!" He sharply rapped.

The pink coated earth pony, not one to flinch or be easily intimidated by a rude remark, just flashed that bright smile of hers. "We're just passing through town and wanted to say hello, that's all!" She insisted, before turning back to her friends and adding. "Oh, and we're also looking for anyone who can tell us where we can find Novo, queen of the hippos! Can you help us?"

The fish creature snorted and turned his nose up at the pink party pony. "'Round these parts, if you want somethin', you gotta give somethin'. So pay up, missy! I ain't runnin' a charity! Whaddya gonna sell to me to make it worth my while?!"

"Oh, you want payment?" Pinkie innocently replied as she dug into her mane with a hoof, soon pulling out a wide asortment of colorful objects. "I've got a few leftover party favors, some extra streamers, and lots and lots of confetti! Ooh, I also have this!" She reached deeper into her mane, pulling out a framed picture of an earth pony with a grey coat and a grey mane and tail. "A framed picture of my sister, Maud, the bestest big sister ever!"

The fish like merchant only frowned, showing his yellow teeth. "Is that all ya got? Don't you have stormbucks on ya?"

"Stormbucks?" Pinkie Pie blinked in blissful unawareness.

The merchant nodded. "Yup. They're the only acceptable currency around here."

Pinkie's cheerful mood faded ever so slightly as she replied. "Oh. I don't have any of those," When she saw the merchant glare at her she sheepishly added. "But I'm sure we can work something out, right? Right?"

The fish creature only snapped! "Forget it, pony! If you're not gonna pay, I'm not tellin' you anything!"

Twilight then came trotting up, not so subtly using her magic to pull Pinkie aside. "Pinkie, what do you think you're doing?!"

"Trying to get answers, silly." Pinkie replied.

Twilight frowned. "You're gonna get us all in trouble!"

The pink party pony giggled. "Oh relax, Twilight. We're not in any trouble at all."

Yet within seconds of Pinkie speaking those words, several of the other creatures from the surrounding market stands showed up. They all eyed the ponies with greedy looks in their eyes!

Twilight growled, narrowing her eyes at her pink party friend. Pinkie, for her part, could only nervously giggle as she realized the very uncomfortable situation she'd unintentionally put herself and her friends in.

Unbeknownst to everyone, one creature was eyeing the scene from afar. This creature was quite curious about the ponies, especially given how brightly colored they seemed to be. Suddenly, the gears in his mind started to turn. "Ponies, huh? Interesting." It said to itself, and started to scheme. It was going to win over those ponies no matter what it took.

---

Meanwhile, back at the market stand, the merchants encircled and surrounded the ponies, causing quite a scene. The fish like merchant was the first one to speak up. "I call dibs on the pink one! She owes me money!"

Twilight stomped a hoof down! "I beg your pardon?!"

"You heard me!" The fish creature angrily retorted! "I told her to pay up or else!"

"Well I hate to break it to you, but we're not for sale!" Twilight sternly objected. "We don't want any trouble."

"Well too bad, you just found it!" The merchant growled.

Another merchant then shouted. "I want the one with the wings and the horn, she looks important. Bet she'll fetch a good price on the market."

"Forget the ponies, I want the little dragon." A third merchant chimed in.

And one merchant even vowed! "I'll pay fifty stormbucks for the whole lot of 'em! I want 'em for my collection!"

"Twilight, what are we gonna do?!" Spike nervously asked as the circle of merchants grew closer and closer.

Twilight kept her horn charged and at the ready, continuing to plead with the merchants. "I'm warning you all now. Leave us alone, and no one gets hurt! We're sorry for bothering you. If you let us go, we'll leave and never bother any of you ever again."

The first merchant just laughed in reply. "Talk is cheap, pony! It'll do you no good! No outsider who's come to Klugetown has ever left the same way they came in! You'll all be no different!"

Yet before anyone could say or do anything else, there came a sharp, sudden whistle. A masculine sounding voice cried out. "Hold it! Hold it! Hold it! Let's all just back up it, now!" Emerging from an alley was a large, bi-pedal cat creature wearing a red jacket with three buttons on the collar. The cat had orange fur with dark brown stripes, dark blue hair, and greenish-yellow eyes.

The cat quickly placed himself between the ponies and the merchants, telling the merchants. "I think you'd better let these ponies go."

"Fat chance, Capper!" The fish like creature taunted in reply. "You should stay out of this!"

"Hey, I'm just trying to keep you all from making the worst mistake of your lives," "Capper" insisted. "I mean just look at them. You think those bright colors are natural? Un-uh. These ponies and their dragon, they're infected with a disease: Rainbowanitis Coloritis. And it's contagious to creatures like you," As he spoke, he was secretly dipping his tail into some bluish-green paint, before applying it to one of the merchants. "Now, as long as none of you are covered with spots, you'll all be fine," Then he pretended to just now notice the spots he'd painted on the merchant and gasped! "Uh-oh! It's too late, you've been infected!"

The merchant gasped as the others all recoiled in fright! "W-what should I do?!" He frantically asked the cat.

The cat just ominously replied with a wince. "Enjoy your last moments. Oh, and don't touch anyone, because parts will fall off!"

The fish creature's face turned bright pink at the realization! He hastily ran off, screaming and hollering hysterically! The other merchants dispersed soon afterward, none of them wanting to come anywhere close to the ponies and dragon.

Now alone with the seven newcomers, the cat flashed a knowing wink at them. "It's okay, you're safe now. You're welcome, by the way."

Author's Note:

Something I'm going to try to fix throughout this rewrite is the portrayals of Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, and Rarity. The movie has them more or less stuck in their default personalities, and some even said that the movie made Pinke Pie and Rainbow Dash rather dumb. With many of their antics being what gets the mane six into trouble, and their better attributes not always shining through, it's a valid criticism.

I also feel like, even if the movie wanted Capper to save the mane six, it ignored the very obvious fact that some of them could try to defend themselves. And I'm also trying to give Applejack and Fluttershy more to say and do, since the movie did so little with them that there were unfounded rumors that they were going to be offed.

And I don't believe that Klugetown was ever named as such on-screen, not even retroactively.

Comments

[Comickook]

Once more, the work on the alterations on the characterizations, exchanges and future chapter set-up, as well as the reasoning mentioned in the notes was great.

On to the next chapter.

[Okie Brony]

What? Still no explanation as to how the Mane 6 (plus Spike) travelled the dozens, if not hundreds, of miles to The Badlands so quickly? Chapter 3 Should Have Ended with them boarding a south-bound train.

Either that, or you could mention how close Ponyville is to The Badlands. Just my two cents.