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Nights

The soft brush of hair against his nose made Spike jolt awake. It was not an unpleasant feeling, but not one he had expected. His muscles tensed as his eyes shot open quickly. Then Spike remembered where he was; he had been on a luxury cruise liner bound for Equestria for the last four days now. And sleeping by him for the last two had been the mare of his dreams.

Rarity.

He relaxed a little in the darkness. Spike still lay on the massive bed with blankets draped over his rough scales. Between his arms was the snow-white mare blissfully sleeping. Spike smiled as he realized that the days of waking up in horror would be over. He could live in the now with the woman he loved. He gazed down at her neck pressed against his chest; her purple mane was swept up to avoid as much tangling as possible through the night. Spike craned his own neck to kiss it gingerly. He let himself press against her for a few seconds as he relaxed deeper into the softness surrounding him.

She stirred at his movement. It was still very late, or early by the looks of it. The sun had no inkling of rising and the room was dark, illuminated solely by the digital clock across the bedframe. Spike gave a gentle squeeze of Rarity’s body as she shifted against his hold. He hoped it had not been too much to wake her. He was evidently wrong as she turned to him with bleary-eye and a pouty face.

“Spike?” Her voice came more in a whine. She was definitely not happy with him. “Spike, it’s not even light out. What’s going on?” She tried to focus on his features, but the darkness paired with her tired eyes made more of a blurry image than any. She could make out his teeth grinning back against the blackness. It startled her for a moment.

“Nothing Rare. Just had a little dream.” He whispered back and kissed her cheek. Spike felt her pull away gently. He looked to her face and saw the concerned look cross her eyes. The corners of her mouth angled slightly down as she tried to process what was going on.

“Are you sure?” She whispered back. Spike nodded and clutched her withers.

“I’m sure. Didn’t mean to wake you. Sorry.” He offered a goofy grin in response. Rarity could hardly make anything out, but accepted his answer for now. She sighed and rested her head against his arm.

“Alright… if you—yawn—say so.” She stretched her limbs out. A few pops sounded from her tender ligaments worn by age. Rarity snuggled deeper into the cushioned blankets with her head pressed against Spike’s firm arm. Within a few moments she was back to sleep. Spike lowered his own head onto the pillow, resting only centimeters from her face. He let her warm breathing blow across his nose. It was such a different feeling than what he had grown accustomed to.

A good feeling, he reminded himself.

Spike had been in Norfandia for the better part of five years. In that time, he had faced atrocities only read about in ancient history. Four of those years had been spent on the frontline of a near two-decade civil war battling the very creatures he was meant to help. Spike had been the friendship ambassador to the new land, and had left the Norfandians as their ‘hero’. In the few days he had to reflect on his time there, Spike had felt a range of emotions never experienced; disgust, contempt, hatred, and so many more all directed at himself or Twilight. Spike had let these emotions reside for a few days into this cruise returning him to Equestria, only until he reunited with Rarity on the off chance. She had listened to him, and despite knowing what he had done she accepted and loved him even more than before. Now Spike was working on forgiving himself the way Rarity did. He still shuddered at the thought of his past action, but it was the past. No sense in dwelling on it.

Despite that, Spike still harbored guilt for many things. He did not know if he could get over the amount of lives he had taken. Most importantly, he did not know how he would react to seeing his sister and ruler of Equestria Twilight Sparkle upon his return.

Since his departure, Twilight had changed in her interaction. Spike had not seen her personally in those five years, but her letters and orders were that of a far-off ruler with a military mindset rather than his sister. Spike could remember the exact letter that shifted his attitude towards Twilight;

Dear Ambassador

I understand the request for reinforcement and supply, but at this time I am unable. Many different cultural celebrations around Equestria are occurring this time of year and require our attention. With our fragile union of all nations, it is important now more than ever to focus on our homeland. I am sure you understand. We shall send what aid we can next year, but until then you will need to be resourceful. I regret not being more available, but the Equestrian people have faith in you.

Your Princess,

Twilight Sparkle.

Spike had nearly burnt the letter when he had read it. It was not so much the content that hurt, but the way she addressed it. Ambassador, your Princess, not ‘Dear Spike’ or ‘your sister’. He had pushed those emotions down best he could at the time. Spike did not have the luxury of dwelling on it while pushing against a tidal wave of enemies. But now he was on a cruise with plenty of time to think. And thinking is dangerous.

When he had ran into Rarity, that came with its own set of difficulties. But as of now, it was working. That left his mind empty enough to think about Twilight.

What am I going to say? He frowned in the darkness. Spike felt his head become sore; his eyes had been darting back and forth while he thought, straining the part of his head behind the socket. He closed them and rubbed the bridge of his scaled snout. Just don’t overthink it. I’m sure she’ll be glad to see you. He tried to reconcile.

Spike then realized he had no idea how long he would be in Equestria before the royal duties of friendship ambassador called him away again. It sent nervous sweats underneath his scales. The small beads of cold water itched along his back. Spike did not want to wake Rarity again with any unwanted motion, so he carefully detangled himself from her and crawled away. He stood at the head of the bed and grabbed a looser long-sleeved shirt. It was white but with some inky stains spotting it from his time spent in the dirts of Norfandia. As he slid it over his damp scales, Spike glanced back to Rarity. She muttered in her sleep and shifted at the loss of her firm pillow. Spike envied her; it had been a long time since he had a restful sleep. Even with her newfound company, Spike spent most nights wrestling himself to slumber.

He took one last look at her graceful form glowing against the darkness before turning and heading for the door. Spike almost tripped over the shallow steps that led down to the bed. Pretentious rich taste he fumed. Should anyone have been in there, they would have seen his cheeks a bright red. He managed to make it to the door handle without any more missteps. Spike clutched the metal rod and carefully pulled it as to not make a sound. He stepped through the portal quickly and closed the door behind him.

The hallway lights were a dimmer tone for this hour of the night. The only people who should be up at this hour would be the night crew and some lonesome passengers. Spike wove his way down the soft hallway to the main route of the stairs. He recoiled at their cold material as he walked down them. Spike frowned as he let himself continue thinking.

What had he missed out on in the five years? Would his friends even have time to see him? Was this cruise the only time he would get with Rarity? Questions flew in and out of his head like a flock of birds on migration. He knew Pinkie had a son before he left, but he had hardly seen the kid. How old was Little Cheese now? Six? Maybe seven? He racked his brain. That brought him to think of age and how old everyone was getting. Dragons tended to age very slowly by comparison to most species. Spike was in his prime now and had been for the last seven years. He was expected to stay in top condition for at least another forty years before falling off slowly. But Rarity was evidence enough that all the ponies he knew back home were getting up there in their years. He did not know how much longer it would be until Rarity needed to take her cataracts seriously, but it was coming. All his friends had to be getting into their late thirties. It would be strange to see Spike with Rarity if he were a pony of the same age, but his time in life had shaped him to be somewhat acceptable for her to be with him.

Only Twilight would be staying the same at this point. Now and forever. Spike again felt himself tense at the thought of his sister.

He made his way onto the main hardwood deck. The bar was long closed and most of the chairs were covered with sea blankets. Only the small hot tub looked open with the inner lights gleaming out. Spike meandered his way over to it. He bent over and squatted by its side, testing the water to see if it was still warm. Much to his surprise, it was boiling hot. He sat on the edge and rolled his soft pants up to his knees. His legs dangled in and relaxed at the warm waters. The warmth shot up his whole body and kept his blood moving in the cold night air. Spike looked up at the moon that gazed down at him. The surface was brilliantly pale in the abyssal sky. The celestial body was accompanied by a myriad of stars that danced around their bigger sister. Spike wondered if the moon ever felt angry with the stars for being so distant.

“Hey.” The voice came from behind Spike. He whirled around and raised his right arm to his chest. The pony backed up and held a hoof in apology. “Whoa! I didn’t mean to spook you! I just wanted to hang out!” The turquoise pony stammered. He flashed a hesitant grin at Spike. Spike realized he was looking at Sandbar; one of the old students at Twilight’s school and now a crew on the Cosmic Sister cruise liner. Spike smiled and lowered his claw to his face.

“Jeez, I’m sorry man. I just really expected no one else to be out here.” Spike chuckled. He motioned for Sandbar to come closer. The pony hesitated, but stepped forward when he saw Spike lower his hands back into the water.

“You seem like you’re on edge.” Sandbar poked.

“A little.”

“Something on your mind?”

Spike sighed as Sandbar sat next to him on the edge. He traced his clawtip in the water creating a small swirl between his legs.

“Just thinking about what’s going to happen when I’m back. I’ve been gone so long I don’t even know how to fit in.”

“Ah don’t say that. Equestria is just as squishy as you remember.” Sandbar chuckled. “Seriously, nothing there changes it seems. I had to get out of there because of how monotonous it was.”

Spike raised an eyebrow at that.

“I thought you left because of Yona?”

Sandbar lowered his own hoof into the water and raised some of it out letting it trickle down.

“Well, that too. But seriously, I love my friends and family. Equestria though? It’s just too… predictable. Nothing seems to go wrong anymore.”

“Are you complaining about that?” Spike brushed Sandbar’s shoulder. He laughed a little and raised his hoofs.

“No no don’t get me wrong; I don’t miss having to worry about the world ending. But I’m talking about the people. Everyone is on the same page now. Everything works itself out. I didn’t see my family for over two years, and we picked our dynamic up instantly. It just felt too…”

“Familiar?” Spike finished. Sandbar turned to him and smiled.

“Yea. No surprises anymore.”

Spike again sighed and folded his arms.

“What I would give for no more surprises. You ought to apply to be ambassador.” Spike offered.

“Why do you think I chose these ships to work on? Every day a new island. Maybe tomorrow we get a storm! Who knows. That’s what I’m looking for.” Sandbar wished out loud.

“I’ve seen enough surprises for a lifetime. There is a limit.” Spike reprimanded. Sandbar looked down from the sky and flipped his mane out of his face.

“Maybe, but I haven’t found it.”

Spike felt his heart sink a little. It had not been that long ago he had a similar attitude; excited to see a new land and new people. Hoping for the greatest adventure to tell. Now, he had a million thoughts pestering his conscious and feelings battling for dominance. He would give so much to go back to the simpler times.

“But just cause this adventure is over, that doesn’t mean you don’t have more waiting. And not all of them have to be surprises.” Sandbar interrupted. Spike turned his head away from the pony and looked back to the stars.

“I guess not. I think I’m just tired.” He let out.

“Well, you’ve got a cozy bed for a reason.” Sandbar punched softly on his shoulder. Spike turned back and smiled.

“True that.”

Spike opened the door as quietly as he had left earlier. The hallway light cast a faint illumination into his grandeur room. He stepped inside and closed the door softly. The creaking of the carpeted floor was deafening in his stealthy approach. Spike finally reached the side of the bed and crawled onto it. He laid his head next to Rarity’s which had turned back the other way from when he left. Just as he relaxed thinking he had spared Rarity from another interruption to her sleep, she turned to him with wide eyes.

“And where did you get off to?” She poked his chest. Spike closed his eyes and winced at his being caught.

“Just—” He sighed. “Just went off to think. Talked with Sandbar a little.” He smiled and looked back into her purple eyes. She raised her brow, but the smile on her lips told Spike she was more teasing than anything.

“Mm, I’m not good enough company?” She began tracing her hoof along his shirt.

“Hard to talk to a pony who snores.” He teased back. She suddenly hit his chest softly. Her mouth opened in feigned shock.

“Me? Snore? I would never! No lady would ever snore!” Rarity cried. Spike laughed low and grabbed her flailing hoof. He kissed the end of it tenderly and looked into her eyes.

“Even if you did, I would be privileged just to hear more coming from that lovely mouth.” He grinned. Rarity rolled her eyes and opened her jaw again.

“Oh, my goodness, Cliché much?” She teased. Spike now put on a display of fake hurt.

“I just wanted to express my truest deepest feelings! How could you hurt me like that?” He placed the pack of his hand to his forehead. “She doesn’t love me! Oh, the pain! The horror!” Spike wallowed out in quite the show. Rarity giggled and slapped his claw down.

“Please dear, stick to the gym. You’re just a dreadful actor.” She smothered her laugh.

“I’ll have you know I memorized a whole Hayspeare play when I was nine. Twilight made me!” He laughed out. Suddenly Spike’s mood changed at the mention of Twilight. His laugh died down and his lips turned. The creases on his forehead thickened.

“What’s the matter Spikey?” Rarity cooed.

“Nothing. I just—it was nothing.” He offered another smile. Rarity’s skeptical look told Spike she had no intention of believing that.

“Well—just know I’m here for you.” She consoled. “But in the morning Spike. It’s nearly three in the morning. If the sun isn’t out, then neither shall I be.” She huffed playfully. Spike smiled and looked down at the bed.

“Fair enough. But thanks.” He offered. Rarity looked a little confused at his gratitude.

“Whatever for darling?” She asked.

“For listening. For waiting up for me. I promise I’ll let you sleep now. Sorry Rare.” He leaned forward and kissed her. They held it for just a moment before they broke apart to look into each other’s eyes. They sat in silence for a moment just watching each other.

“You have terrible dragon breath dear.”

“Are you serious?” Spike laughed out. Rarity pushed him away with a smile.

“Just a little. Nothing a brush won’t help in the morning. But seriously, sleep. I’m exhausted from all your restlessness.” She teased. Rarity sank back down against Spike and flipped herself to be held by his arms. Spike enjoyed the warmth of her body pressed against his cold-blooded skin. The shirt between them helped keep what little heat he generated in, but Rarity was infinitely better. Spike thought about his restless sleep and how it must be affecting her. That was not fair. He did his best to lie still until he heard the rhythmic breathing coming from Rarity’s chest.

Not long after he listened to her steady breath, Spike finally felt the much-welcome drowsiness overcome his body. He let himself drift for a moment in his mind. Sleep perforated the edges of his consciousness. That was until he saw the letter show up in his mind once more.

Dear Ambassador…

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