Asterix in Equestria

by 23LEvans

Chapter 6

Chapter 6
“I am going to bury that Bard in a hole in the ground!” Vitalstatistix yelled in a rage, “he’ll have to listen to his own voice echo back of those walls!”, “not that that will bother him” one shieldbearer said to the other. “This is your bards doing? surely you jest” Luna said, “i’m afraid not it is only our bard who can sing and cause the gods to get angry”

“Is he that good at singing” Celestia wonders, “no he’s that bad” Asterix corrected, “we need to find him”, “then what are we waiting for” Rainbow said and before anyone could stop her she shot out of the window only to get blown away by the window, “Rainbow?!” the others exclaimed running and watching as she was blown away.

Cloudsdale
Rainbow landed with a Loud CRASH.

She was stunned but unhurt, “Rainbow? Your here?” the voice of Soren, her fellow wonderbolt said, “yup i’m here” she confirmed as she recognised the Wonderbolt changing room, “well glad you are” Spitfire said, “we have tried getting to canterlot to clear the storm, but the wind just blows us back”

“Hey don’t worry me and my friends got this” Rainbow said as shot back upn and towards Canterlot, only to return a second later with another CRASH!

Canterlot
“We need to stop this” Celestia said her horn glowing, there was a large flash of light and when it faded. The storm was still going, “my failsafe spell…failed?” she said in shock, “the only weather that a spell like that has failed to stop was the winds in the crystal empire” Luna said.

“The only way to dry up this weather is to dry up cacofonix” Asterix said, “we’ll go look for him”, Asterix turned to the pony’s, “have you got anything to protect us from the sky falling on our heads?” he asked.

The pony’s only gave him a quizzical look.

Sure enough Twilight had put up a shield around them and they were now braving the wind, the shield kept the rain out but not the wind, not completely at least, Obelix had his menhir back as a last resort incase the bard wouldn’t shut up “um why are you so afraid of the sky falling on your heads?” Twilight asked just out of curiosity, it was nonsense of course but she was curious, “well how can it not?” Vitalstatistix said, “theres nothing holding it up”

Suddenly Vitalstatistix felt rather light, “oh Belonous! Help!” he exclaimed as his shield was caught up the wind and he was blown off it, out of the magic barrier, and into the rain landing in the puddle.

“W-we need to find cacofonix” Shivered the chief as he came back into the barrier, “do you have any amphitheaters or colosseums around here?” Asterix asked, “whats a colosseum?” Fluttershy asked, “you know where the circus is”.

“The circus? Oh i love the circus” Pinkie said, “can we go, after we finish all this. Maybe i can ask to be in it…”, “we are wasting time. And i don’t think you’ll make a convincing Gladiator anyway” Asterix said leaving the pony’s looking shocked. Not at the fact that he shut down Pinkie but the fact that they had gladiators.

Spike however was more focused on the current problem, “wait the theater” he said, “oh yes the theater. Come on” Twilight said snapping out of her shock. They Pony’s led the Gauls towards the theater, they couldn’t hear any singing but one pegasus who was holding onto a lamp post for dear life.

She was dressed in fancy cloths, “um hello our bard wouldn’t happen to be in their singing horrible?” Asterix asked, “horrible doesn’t even begin to describe it!” the pegasus said indignantly, “he came on stage and took is all by storm. Next thing we knew we were in the rain trying to get away”

“Thats our man” Asterix said, as he tried to open the door, “it’s stuck” he said, “allow me” Obelix said pressing a finger on the door, “Wait…” the pegasus exclaimed but to late.

*CRASH*

The door caved in and…

“ThE RaAIIiNNn In GaUUUullLL!” Cacofinix voice blasted out from the inside along with more rain from the inside of the building, “FalLS MAInly DOwN wAllS!”

“HOLY BUCK” the pegasus said loosing her grip and was swept away by the wind as she put her hooves over her ears, everyone else did and Twilights barrier disappeared, “the magic shields gone” Asterix said in panic as he fled towards the nearest inside open house, “Quick before the sky falls on our heads!”

Seconds later they sat watching the flapping door of the theater as Cacofinix voice continued to warble, “we are never going to get anywhere at this rate” Applejack said, “if only we can block out the noise” Fluttershy said, “i don’t know any deafening spells. Never thought we would need one” Twilight said, “wait Twilight never studied a spell?!” Rarity exclaimed, “now that is a surprise” Applejack said in amusement, “can we focus?” Spike asked.

“Woof” Dogmatix barked, but it sounded muffled, “what is it Dogmatix?” Obelix asked, Fluttershy fluttered over while the other huddled together “hey i think Dogmatix has something” Obelix said. “Yes obelix good to know” Asterix said as he thought, “magic potion is no good here”.

“Magic potion?” Twilight asked, “later” Asterix said dismissively, “anything?” Spike asked, “oh oh me pick me” Pinkie said not grasping the situation and putting her hoof into the air, “um girls” Fluttershy tried to speak up, “go ahead sugarcube” Applejack said to pinkie.

“What if we block our ears?” Pinkie said, “with what?” Asterix asked, “maybe with Parsley” Obelix said, “and where do you suppose we can get parsley?” Rarity asked sarcastically, the very idea was repugnant to her, “woof” Dogmatix pipped up presenting the parsley in his mouth.

There was a awkward silence, “h-how?” Spike eventually asked, “from the shopkeeper over there, we’re in the grocery store” Fluttershy explained pointing to the counter, and the rows of food in the place, “h-hello?” the shopkeeper said nervously. “Obelix i really need to learn to listen to you in future” Asterix said apologetically.

“I am not putting that stuff in my ears” Rarity said, as everyone began putting Parsley in their ears “suck it up Rares and get them in” Applejack snapped, “we need all hands on this”, Rarity cringed and put them in her ears with much complaining.

“Alright” Asterix said, “Twilight get the shield up” he said, “pardon?” Twilight asked, “pardon?” Asterix repeated, “are we gonna sit here all day or are we gonna silence that bard?” Applejack demanded, “Pardon?” Rarity asked, “speak up girls?” Fluttershy said, “pardon?” Obelix asked, “we are going to be here until the sky falls on our heads” Dogmatix thought and he jumped down from Obelix hand and bit on Rarity’s Tail, “Yeowch!” she exclaimed, “you barbarian!”

Dogmatix didn’t mind her reproaches and simple barked in front of everyone before shooting for the open entrance door, “oh right sorry” Twilight said getting the message as she put up her shield and the group walked, protected from the rain, partially protected from the wind and mercifully unable to hear the awful sound of cacofonix.

Walking into the the theater they found Cacofonix on the main stage, as he plucked his Lyre most un-tunefully, as he began to Crushendo, “CACOFONIX SHUT UP?!” Asterix yelled at the top of his voice, so loudly it cracked and he got breathless, “No i won’t shut up, i will sing you ungrateful lot in front of the adoring crowd” or lack there off.

“Pardon?” Pinkie asked taking the parsley out of one ear, “all together now!” Cacofinix said ad crescendoed

“aaaAANNddD thE StOrm swEeEpS AwaYYY AAALLllLLL”

“I got him” Obelix said as he readied his menhir like a javelin and took a running start, Asterix didn’t need to hear to know what his friend was thinking, “Wait Obelix DON’T!” he yelled but to late, and even if it wasn’t Obelix couldn’t hear him.

Obelix threw the Menhir with precision and force as it soared threw the air and…

*CRASH*

Landed on top of cacofonix, squashing him and destroying the bit of stage he was standing on, that certain shut him up thought as inside the rain and wind stopped and outside the weather cleared.

Everyone was relieved.

Back at the palace
“Oh thank goodness” Luna said relieved, all their weather spells had failed, and instead the two had put up a barrier over the windows to not let any rain or wind in, “praise Bellissima” Sniffled Vitalstatistix, he had caught a terrible cold, “t-that bard really leaves me feeling the cold.”

Back at the theater
Asterix was less than pleased with his big Friend, “when will you learn to not throw menhirs at the wrong time?!” Asterix exclaimed, keeping his temper, “i just hope the Bards okay” Fluttershy said looking at the Menhir with the bards limbs poking out from under it in some concern.

“Oh don’t worry” Asterix said with a sigh, “he’s been hit with worse, he’ll be back up and wanting to sing again soon”, as it turned out Asterix would be wrong on both accounts, Twilight magically lifted the Menhir up off the bard who sat up looking and feeling like he had been hit with a Menhir.

“Are you alright Cacofinix?” Asterix asked in concern, “w-why yes i-i’m feeling fine” he said.

“Who are you?”

Author's Note:

And that’s another chapter done. Hope your all enjoying

Comments

[Moproblems Moharmoney]

"These ponies are crazy!"

[Joe Toon]

Out of curiosity, is English not your first language/maiden tongue?

[efug25g]

11385795
Not as crazy as that Gaul Bard. LMAO!!! It almost sounded like that the bard lost his memory after getting struck by Obelix's merhir!!!