Asterix in Equestria

by 23LEvans

Chapter 2

Chapter 2
Twilight came to groggily and opened her eyes, and then she finds that her friends were looking around the place in awe and slight disgust as it had been left in a terrible state, and since it was a laboratory you can only imaging the state it was in, “oh your awake sugarcube” Applejack said happily, “what in tarnation went on here?” “Indeed this place is in a terrible state darling” Rarity said, Twilight looked around still upset at her failure.

“I warned you” Spike said, Twilight had to admit her friends had a point about it being in a terrible state, “next time Twi take Spikes offer on a break” Rainbow Dash said, “okay so i may have overdone it” Twilight admitted, “you really overdid it” Rainbow dash said, “it’s nothing to be ashamed about twilight we all over do it sometime” Fluttershy said reassuringly.

“Well come on guys, Spring Cleaning!” Pinkie pie said excitedly getting out a bunch of brooms and cleaning equipment, “thanks guys but-” Twilight began but then she felt a wave of sudden powerful energy flow through her then leave her, it was so powerful it made her stagger. “Oh darling, are you okay?” Rarity asked, concerned “yeah must be the after effect” Twilight said, chuckling nervously as she did not want to admit that she didn’t know.

Canterlot castle
Celestia was signing papers for reasons I have no idea about, when she also felt that wave of energy it was a powerful wave, she staggered on her throne a little bit, “princess are you okay?” a royal guard asked, “i’m-” Celestia began but then Luna burst in panicked, “Sister did you feel it?!” she exclaimed.

“Yes Luna I did” Celestia said, standing up and trotting off her throne Luna trotting behind her“come Luna let’s track down the source and see if it is a threat”.

East coast of equestria
The village of the indomitable Gauls had been transported and was now an island slightly off the coast of equestria; the four Romans camps were somewhere in the nearby forest. The villagers had stopped fighting fish raised in mid swing and eyes wide in surprise, “I-I do say that was a blinding flash What” Anticlimax said, “yes a blinking bright one” Asterix agreed looking at the gem which disintegrated in his hand.

“Um Getafix what just happened?” Vitalstatistix asked baffled, magic and spells were Getafix’s area, Getafix honestly had no clue, “I’m afraid I don’t know” he admitted, “piggiwiggi!” Called a voice from the gates of the village.

It was Impedimenta, Vitalstatistix's wife. Vitalstatistix really wished his wife would stop using his pet name for him in public. “I think we need to find a way across,” Impedimenta said as the rest of the villagers went through the villages to see what she had seen.

They all started in surprise to see the sea not where it was supposed to be, “by Totatis!” Many exclaimed, “Look” Obelix said, “why if it isn’t our old friends the pirates” Asterix said, indeed it was the pirates that roamed the waters around gaul and have the bad luck to somehow always meet asterix at sea, their ship had been beached some way down the shore and they were clinging to it despite some of the crew had been partially buried in the sand.

“Well this is a fine beach they aint it” the captain said sarcastically “and i just stole this ship” “Male Parta Male Dilabuntar” said his old peg legged first mate who was always ready with a latin saying “What was wrongly gained is wrongly lost, don’t say i didn’t warn you”.

“Oh shut up we stole it fair and square” the captain snapped, “um excuse us but can we reuse your ship for a better use” said a voice down by the beach, he looked and went slightly pale, “th-th-th-the gauls” he squeaked and jumped down and fell on his knees, “please spare us take our ship if you must but please don’t phrash us” the captain begged, “well then off you go obelix looks like he’s getting excited” Asteris said pointing behind him, Obelix was trying to run up to the pirates hands outstretched in front of him for a grab, Unhygienix, Anticlimax and Geriatrix were pushing Obelix stomach and Fulliautomatix and Cacofonix was pulling the back of his striped breached to hold him back.

The pirates ran for it, “we’re sunk again” remarked the lookout man, “even beached i get that sinking feeling” another crew member said, “calm down do” the captain said despite being the one running the fastest, “we’ll just go find a port and get us a new ship follow me then it will be a beach day”, “and as usual I’ll have to be the lifeguard” the peg legged first mate grumbled. “Alright let's break this thing apart and build a bridge” Asterix said, “Obelix go find some rocks and build some pillars like this” he then drew the shape of a pillar in the sand with a stick.

“Alright Asterix” Obelix, “come on dogmatix” he then walked of to a cluster of rocks nearby with his small dog not to far away “maybe we can even build two, one for walking and one for fishing,” Fulliatuomatix suggested, “why might I ask?” Unhygenix asked suspiciously, coming nose to nose with Fulliautomatix “because then your fish won’t stink so much” Fulliautomatix replied.

“Well hop to it you two” Asterix said before the situation could grow as he took a swig of magic potion in a gord he always carried around, he then gave it to Anticlimax to take a swig who gave it to Geriatrix then to Cacofinix, then Unhygienix and Fulliautomatix. Now that they were all dosed up with magic potion they got to work, Asterix and Anticlimax pulled the boards apart with his bare hands and gave them to Geriatrix and who jogged them over with great speed to Unhygienix and Fulliautomatix who nailed the boards together.

“Can I give a-?” Cacofonix started, “no” Asterix cut in sternly knowing what he was about to ask and not willing to get drenched, “awfully sorry old bean but the weather in Brittany can’t compare to the level you bring with your yapping What” Anticlimax agreed keeping his upper lip stiff, Cacofonix scowled.

After about 5 minutes Obelix came back carrying 10 pillars, 5 balanced on each other in each hand, “are these good Asterix?” he asked, “why they are my old friend”, “a smashing good job What” Anticlimax agreed “come on then let’s put them in place” Unhygenix said. Together they placed the pillars in place in the water, it wasn’t that deep and they could place 2 on top of each other then nailed the platforms together with more boards of wood.

The Chief had wanted to hammer the final nail into place so they finished placing the boards into place and allowed the chief to do so, “Friends, Gauls, Countrymen, lend me your ears!” Vitalstatistix began, “oh marvelous another long winded speech” Impedimenta said sarcastically, “may this bridge be a symbol that no matter what this village of Gaul remain indomitable to all, weather it be by invaders of natural causes”, “hardly natural being teleported to belenos knows where” Getafix whispered to Asterix, “what does Teleport mean?” Obelix asked, “teleport: moved from one place to another” Getafix enlightened.

“Well why isn’t it natural i do it all the time with Menhirs'' Obelix pointed out, “SILENCE” Vitalstatistix shouted, “now as i was saying-” “AmOriCA, amORIca, TOtaTIs SaiNt’s FOR theE” Warbled the voice of Cacofonix, he was tied to a tree and gagged, or was supposed to be because the gag had slipped allowing him to sing, they all clapped their hands over their ears. Dark Clouds formed over the village, “AmORIca Oh ThaNKS FOr the GrEaT Gift OF THE lAnD” Cacofonix continued completely out of tune as the rain came down, the wind picked up, the waves in the ocean became very rough and lightning struck and they all got drenched.

In the bushes of the forest a patrol of romans ran back to the camps also getting drenched, “this isn’t even the final drop” one said, “dripping miserable is what it is” another commented, “less dripping more fleeing” a third said. When they got back to the camp of Totorum they all had nasty colds and their sentimental centurion couldn’t tear them a new one, “report to the medical tent and get yourselves warm” he ordered.

“Got cold feet did yah” the medic said teasingly, “better a cold then gauls” one of them said, “everytime i see one i freeze in fear” another agreed, “enough puns my patients is reaching below Zero” the third snapped, “oh stop being such drips” the medic snapped.

Canterlot castle meantime 11:00
Celestia and Luna were addressing their Royal guards including shining armor, “alright brave guard, we had detected a large magical wave in the east we need you all to go scout the area, if there is a threat capture it and bring it to Canterlot” Celestia said, “use force if necessary” Luna added, “you heard her men” Shining armor spoke up, “keep your wits and be ready and don’t hold back”, “sir yes sir” they all said.

They got into chariots pulled by Pegasus and soared into the air towards the east, an hour later they touched down half a kilometre away from the east coast. “Alright men spread out towards the east and cover ground leave no stone unturned” Shining Armor ordered, “and we shall show all the strict discipline and order of our ranks”.

With that they all marched towards the east.

Back at the Gaulish village
It was lunchtime at the Gaulish village and Asterix, Anticlimax, Obelix and Dogmatix we're going hunting, as it turned out the boats had gotten, “okay Obelix let’s split up and see if we can’t find something for our village to eat” Asterix said.

“Oh goody let’s make it a game” Obelix said, “whoever brings something to eat first wins”, the four went in opposite directions, “i say old fruit will good old Obelix be okay what?” Anticlimax asked, “worst case he runs into a roman patrol and we all know how that ends”
They knew but the ponies weren't, the ponies that Obelix was heading towards.

Another roman patrol was walking through the forest and mapping out the area, “i’ve came and saw a lot of places” one remarked, “but this place is new, i don’t think we’re in gaul anymore”, “impossible” dismissed the patrol leader, “how can the four camps and the village be moved just like that?”. “Well, remember that light we saw before we came here?” the legionary said, “and don’t forget these gauls have magic powers”.

The patrol leader couldn’t dismiss the idea, “well okay but-” “halt in the name of celestia” said a new voice, they all turned and their helmets jumped up in surprise entirely under their steam as they saw colorful horses wearing armor and holding spears and sword, the leader was wearing purple armor so the patrol leader assume he was the leader.

“Who are you to dare oppose the might of Rome'' the patrol leader orders, “be silent monsters'' the purple armored horse said, unknown to him the roman patrol leader and his romans were trying very hard not to laugh, “surrender we have you outnumbered” that was the final straw. The romans fell about laughing, “don’t get on your high horses just yet” the roman patrol leader said mockingly, “oh stop it Thisisnthumorous Hahahahahaha” laughed another Roman rolling on the ground in fits of laughter.

“I agree this is not humorous, you will surrender for questioning” Shining armor, who it really was, ordered angrily, “oh please you think you can stand against the roman legions with armor like that?” The Roman patrol leader asked, “That's gold, what will gold do against swords? I must say you don’t have much horse sense.”, “Be silent creatures,” the shining armor said, not liking being talked down to by someone he didn’t see as his superior.

“*sigh* take me in then” the patrol leader said wearily “it’s better than-” “CRAZY GAULS” shouted the rest of his squad, “yes that”, “ROMANS” said a voice of happiness, the Patrol leader took a double take, and his eyes fell on a very happy Obelix with a very angry dogmatix jumping out of the bushes “EEK! help! It's him! retreat!” the roman patrol leader said, running away with Obelix hot in pursuit. Shining armor fired a shot at obelix’s helmet which bounced off of course, Obelix skidded to a halt and turned, “grrrrr”growlee dogmatix “halt creature or face our wrath” Shining armor said.

“They’ll be hoarse in the morning” one of the running romans commented, “alright fatso” said a extremely cocky royal guard mockingly, “what are you gonna do nooooooooowwwww” he finished 250 feet in the air, the guards follow their companions crash course, “talk about taking liftoff” one quipped. “i am not fat” Obelix said, the guards began to shake fearfully as Obelix spun his fist in the air “stout maybe but not fat”. Meanwhile back at the village Cacofinix saw the ponies go flying, “Obelix must have run into a roman patrol, that means the romans are here” he called down, “the easiest way to take fliet” Fulliautomatix commented smugly.

“Crash course is more like it” another villager remarked, “those guys are always living off when they see him” a third quipped, “it’s a crash course more like” Unhygienix said.

Back at the pony guards they all landed back at the chariot, 25 of them all together along with some pegasus to guard the chariots, Shining armor and his men got up sporting impressive bruises and black eye’s. “Huh captain are you okay?” one of the chariot pegasus asked, “no we gotta warn the princess come on men” Shining Armor said.

In truth his confidence had been rattled and he did not want to put himself or his men back up against that big fat Gaul he heard the Romans call it.

Ponyville an hour later
Twilight and her friends were having lunch in their throne room, there were six large thrones for the element barriers, and a seventh next to twilights for Spike and a makeshift extra large one for discord. Suddenly Spike held his mouth as if to throw up and burped out purple flame and a scroll appeared in the air, Twilight magically unrolled it and read it carefully “What does it say sugarcube?” Applejack asked, “It says we’re needed at Canterlot” Twilight said urgently, “it’s urgent

Author's Note:

Right that’s another chapter done sorry for any spelling mistakes and comment on what you thought but be polit about it that way I respect everyone’s opinion

Comments

[efug25g]

Oh dear, BBBFF is in trouble. Wait until Twilight hears about this!!!

[valexto]

That's a really funny crossover, I honestly can't imagine how it can evolve but I look forward to the next chapter. Keep up the good work!