I Cast Gun

by hamster wizard

The Vendetta

Twilight pushed open the door to Sugercube Corner and entered the bakery. She was followed by Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy, and all three of them seemed a bit nervous. They could see Mrs. Cake leaning on the counter, sobbing with her face down. Twilight stepped forward.

“Mrs. Cake! I can see you’re busy, but I was wondering if you’ve seen Pinkie Pie?” Twilight asked innocently.

Mrs. Cake looked up, tears staining her eyes, “Oh princess! It’s terrible! Pinkie Pie, she- she-” she sniffed loudly, “She’s been kidnapped by ninjas!”

Rainbow and Fluttershy shared a concerned look to each other, and Twilight asked, “Are you certain she was kidnapped? Pinkie gets up to some odd things you know.”

Mrs. Cake shakily passed Twilight a folded note, which she read aloud: “Mr. Cake. We have kidnapped the pink one. The time has come to pay for your sins. Signed, the Blue Icing Syndicate.” She turned around and spoke to her friends, “This is serious girls, this was definitely sent by ninjas. Mrs. Cake! Do you know where the they’ve taken her?

“I can tell ya.”

The group turned to see Mr. Cake leaning against the wall. They were certain he hadn’t been there when they entered. He had on a blue suit with a messy necktie, and had the stubble of a cigarette hanging from his mouth. He took a long drag and looked to the ponies, “The Blue Icing Syndicate. 20 years ago in Neighpon, I left a lot of bad blood behind. This was before my bounty hunting days mind you. It started during the National Baking Federation regional convention back in 79. I was young, out to make a name for myself, and I was-” He continued on, and the group turned their attention to Mrs. Cake.

She hoofed over an empty envelope, “Here, the return address is on it.”

“Well that’s convenient.” Twilight remarked.

Mrs. Cake wiped her nose and asked seriously, “Twilight, are you a bad enough mare to rescue Pinkie Pie?”

“Don’t worry, we’ll handle this!” Twilight proudly declared.

Rainbow flew up in the air, “Well what are we waiting for! Let’s go kick some ass!”

“No Dash, this is serious. I’ve dealt with ninjas before. They don’t mess around, and to be frank, you’ll just slow me down.” Twilight spoke with an authoritative meter.

Dash sulked, but nodded her head.

“Glad you understand, now come on Fluttershy, we’ve gotta get moving.” She made for the door, motioning for the pegasus to follow.

Fluttershy followed hesitantly, “Oh why me?” And the two of them made their exit.

Rainbow slowly turned her head to watch them leave, mouth hanging open. Mrs. Cake walked up and put a hoof on her shoulder, “Don’t you worry dear, Pinkie is in good hooves! Now how about I fetch you a glass of chocolate milk. Doesn’t that sound nice?” Rainbow sniffled as she quietly nodded her head.

Mr. Cake was still going on off to the side, “-and so West Isle Cooks were wiped out by my hoof, there were no survivors. Or so I though. You see, I wouldn’t feel the fallout from that bloody night until the shipping lanes came into jeopardy, and they brought me in. I was the best after all, but what I didn’t know was-”

̿̿ ̿̿ ̿̿ ̿'̿'\̵͇̿̿\ /̵͇̿̿/'̿'̿ ̿ ̿̿ ̿̿ ̿̿

Night had fallen. Twilight and Fluttershy quietly crept through a secluded grove as cherry blossoms peacefully drifted in the wind surrounding them. They crossed a short wooden bridge and found themselves before a three-story pagoda. There were lights on inside, but not a sound could be heard. Twilight nodded to her friend, and Fluttershy slowly drew a shining katana from her back. Twilight spoke in a hushed tone, “We’ll go in fast, you work down, I’ll work up. The plan is find Pinkie and get out. Now let's wreck some shit.”

Fluttershy nodded and silently took off toward the third floor. Twilight made her way to the front door. With a deep breath, she cast the portal open and stepped inside.

The room was laid out like a sort of lounge, there were several short tables near the floor with mats for seating, but it was mostly empty. Quickly standing up, Twilight counted 20 ninjas, suited in black outfits. She slowly slid the door shut behind her as they drew their weapons; whips, knives and swords flashed in the flickering candlelight. Twilight spoke with an unsettling quiet, “Before we do this. Does anypony want to leave?” Her foes started advancing in response. “Alright. Don’t say I was misunderstood.” She cracked her neck. Showtime.

The closest enemy rushed toward her, a short sickle brandished. Twilight fired a gun spell and the ninja went down with a thud. The pin dropped, and the ninjas swarmed. Launching herself upward with a flap, Twilight neared the ceiling. Stunned, her foes were pegged with a trio of shots, downing three more. Not missing a beat, Twilight then teleported across the room, firing a shot into the back of another enemy. A nearby ninja whipped a razor-sharp chain at Twilight’s head. She grabbed it with her magic and reeled in the offender, blasting a spell in his face as he drew close.

A pair flung knives at the princess. They bounced harmlessly off her magic barrier, and then Twilight responded by shooting them both down. Another charged her with a katana overhead. Twilight snagged the blade from his grasp and impaled the ninja with it. As he fell Twilight broke the blade in two effortlessly. She then hurled the blade at another ninja, who managed to dodge only for it to strike the one behind her. She recovered only to get skewered by the handle that Twilight had then thrown.

The remaining combatants shuffled defensively, moving to surround the princess. She stomped her hoof and let out a wave of magic, knocking them all to the ground. Twilight then fired a volley of gunshots rapidly, striking five in a row. Three recovered, and charged with their weapons hoisted. One jumped at her, and Twilight slid under the ninja, firing a shot into her underside as she did so. Without pause she kicked a table vertical and pushed in at the advancing two, knocking them to the ground. She the jumped on the table, which made a sickening crunch as the ponies buried beneath it groaned.

Only one foe remained. He glanced side to side nervously, before throwing his weapon away and diving through the paper thin wall. Twilight watched as he dashed off into the night. Yeah, I'm bad. Twilight carefully stepped over the bodies and pools of blood as she worked her way to the stairs.

Poking her head into the second floor, she could see Fluttershy untying a captive Pinkie Pie, who was talking a mile a minute. There were a few bodies scattered around; mostly ninjas but also a few wearing fine business suits. Twilight made her way in as the ropes around Pinkie fell to the ground.

“Twilight! Thank you so so so so so so so-” Twilight idly kicked a body as Pinkie went on, “-so so so so so so so so much! You and Fluttershy totally saved my booty!” She gave her rear a little shake to emphasize this.

Twilight gave her a smile, “Of course Pinkie, that’s what friends are for. Fluttershy-” She turned to the pegasus, “How were things on your end?”

“Oh!” Fluttershy pushed her mane out of her eyes, “It went fine. There was only about 50 of them on the third floor. I took them out quickly and found Pinkie down here. There was this really scary stallion; I think he was called something really edgy like Vicious-” She nudged the corpse of a silver stallion with a long trench coat on and a katana resting by his side, “But he wasn't really that tough. I think he was in charge or something? He was definitely the strongest one here.”

“I wouldn’t worry about it, I’m sure he’s nopony important. Now-” Twilight turned away from her friends, “Time to head back to Ponyville! Where nothing bad ever happens!”

Author's Note:

Hey, down here.
I know that Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood plays during the O-Ren fight. I just like it so it's here. There wasn't really music during most of the Crazy 88 fight anyway.
And if you don't know what I'm talking about then you should go watch Kill Bill.

Comments

[HiddenEntity]

Poking her head into the second floor, she could see Flutterhsy untying a captive Pinkie Pie, who was talking a mile a minute. There were a few bodies scattered around; mostly ninjas but also a few wearing fine business suits. Twilight made her way in as the ropes around Pinkie fell to the ground.

“Twilight! Thank you so so so so so so so-” Twilight idly kicked a body as Pinkie went on, “-so so so so so so so so much! You and Flutterhsy totally saved my booty!” She gave her rear a little shake to emphasize this.

Twilight gave her a smile, “Of course Pinkie, that’s what friends are for. Flutterhsy-” She turned to the pegasus, “How were things on your end?”

“Oh!” Flutterhsy pushed her mane out of her eyes, “It went fine. There was only about 50 of them on the third floor. I took them out quickly and found Pinkie down here. There was this really scary stallion; I think he was called something really edgy like Vicious-” She nudged the corpse of a silver stallion with a long trench coat on and a katana resting by his side, “But he wasn't really that tough. I think he was in charge or something? He was definitely the strongest one here.”

HOW DO YOU MISSPELL FLUTTERSHY 4 TIMES IN A ROW???

[hamster wizard]

10553887
I'm a man of means by no means.

Which is to say I don't know.

[Sparkly sparks]

, and the Twilight responded by shooting them both down.

the twilight?

[hamster wizard]

11122215
Fixed ty