CYOA: A Heist With Pinkie Pie

by Leondude

A Heist With Pinkie Pie

You hid behind a tree outside of the entrance to the castle. There was only one royal guard outside. One who merely wandered around with a torch in his mouth. It was a good thing your employer informed you of the recent royal guard strike otherwise you would have been far less prepared. Unfortunately, you didn’t bother bringing a torch with you, believing you were going to do the heist in the middle of the day. If your friends ever found out you believed them when they claimed thestrals guarded the castle at night, they would never let you live it down. They would probably give you a medal with ‘Gullible Weenie For Life’ engraved on it.

As soon as the guard had left, you quickly trotted over to the entrance and shot your grappling hook at one of the windows above, hoping nopony would hear the resulting glass shattering. It would have been easier if your employer had given you a balloon so you could reach the air vents the easy way but she was half an hour late so it was now or never. After much grappling onto windows, you finally found the air vents and quickly hopped in. It only just occurred to you that you should have paid more attention to the blueprints. That way, you would know which vents lead to the throne room. After much navigation through the vents, hoping the chocolate cake you had earlier won’t betray you by leaving you stuck in the vents, you have found your way to a window just outside the throne room. After uttering many obscenities after realizing crawling through the vents was unnecessary, you elegantly jumped through the convenient circle in the window. And then you heard a faint yell that steadily grew louder.

“INCOMIIIIIING!!!”

Smashing through the window was your employer and partner, Pinkie Pie.

“Hi there,” she said, “My name is Pinkie Pie and I organized this heist just for you!”

You didn’t listen. You were wondering to yourself why Pinkie’s entrance didn’t wake up the flock of geese that acted as the security alarm.

“As you know,” she said while enacting the most egregious exposition cliche in history, “Twilight wanted the castle’s security to be better than ever so she put me in charge of testing our new security system, which is like our old security system but better! And since you’re the best of the best, what better way of testing the security than by hiring you to help me steal this?”

She pulled out a picture of the artefact. You had no idea what it was nor did you care. What you did know was that you could make a fortune selling it on the black market. Though, it was probably best to keep that little tidbit to yourself instead of informing Pinkie Pie.

“Now, did you remember to get the stuff?”

You nodded as you pulled a hayburger out of your bag.

“Yay!” she said cheerfully, “Now you stand there and keep watch while I use my super-duper ninja skills to avoid all the geese and take the magic goober from the throne.”

She pointed at the throne, where the artefact was placed. It was surrounded by a flock of geese. You watched as Pinkie jumped from where you and her were standing and performed all sports of acrobatic moves to dodge the sleeping geese, including flopping like a fish while spontaneously defying gravity. You wondered if the geese were heavy sleepers or they were just tired after a long honk. Soon enough, Pinkie had her hooves on the artefact. Unfortunately, her bushy tail was tickling a goose’s beak, causing it to sneeze and wake up all the other geese.

“Quick! Jump down!” she commanded.

You quickly hopped down and ran towards Pinkie Pie, trying to avoid all the honking geese.

“There are two ways we can get out of this doozy!” she shouted over all the honking geese, “We could escape using the trap door or you distract the security guard while I whip out my party cannon!”

Author's Note:

Party Cannon

Trap Door

Comments

[Horseus lord of horses]

Is this based off "A Heist with Markiplier"?

[Leondude]

10465295
Pretty much. Though, it's certainly shorter than A Heist With Markiplier.