I was tortured, betrayed and tormented by them, but I had my revenge, one by one, I hunted them, one by one I killed them, and now this country is mine and WHY THE FLOOR IS FUCKING SHINI--
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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interesting start, this already earned a tracking from me as long as a like.
My friend, this is not the type of story you should be introducing yourself to fimfiction with. Do another round of editing, pick something a little lighter. Dark can be a wonderful way of exploring larger themes and topics other stories might not be able to touch on...for more experienced authors. If I were you, I'd start with something a little lighter. And I'd keep it in editing for a while longer.
I'm all for villian(s) stories. It's refreshing to get away from the protagonist. But the spelling is quite troubling It's almost as if you wrote the story drunk or you were fallen asleep but fighting to stay up.
Hmm. I don't know what to say about this story, I'll track it for now.
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thanks, well, about the spelling, well, i'll do my best!
I didn't see many big errors, but let me help you here a bit:
whenever you make a character speak, give it its own line, see that bold part? Instead of making it part of that paragraph, it should be like this:
also, here I see a few spelling errors: "PONIE" - pony; 'yers" - years; Also, every "i" must be capitalized. for these small errors, I recomend using Word, as It can automatically inform you of them.
Edit: I know that I shouldn't do this, but could you guys spare a minute to look into my profile? I'm in the process of making two new stories that I think that you guys would like, they happen in the same universe, but with different protagonists, also please take a look at my story "Getting out of Hell", only two chapters at the moment, but I'm doing the third right now ( about 90% finished ) and I'm planning on making 3 more before uploading them.
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OK! Thanks for everything, I'll fix it as soon as possible! and at the moment I'm not reading anything so why not?
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Also, don't let the downvotes take you down, I've seen other stories earned many downvotes when they started, but the balance changed as they received more chapters
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it does not shake me, I do not write stories to win likes, I do it because I like it, the likes I get are just a bonus !!!
besides, I think these dislike are because, well, a mother exchanging hooves for her children? genocide of all the characters that appeared on the show and were given a name?
perhaps
This is legit. If you don't mind me asking, what is your mother tongue?
Ooo...this is dark...why do I read this on Sunday