How Do You Shoot a Gun With Hooves?

by defender2222

The Arrival Part 4

Beckett stared at the ceiling, refusing to get up. Normally she was quite a morning person; one had to be when they were a cop. Also had to be a night owl, if you wanted to get technical. The life of a cop meant that sleep schedules were the things of fantasy and fairy tales. More than a few rookies learned that the hard way and suddenly made the switch from law enforcement to private security. Beckett prided herself on being able to wake up at any point and tackle the day with a grim smile and a heavy dose of coffee.

Of course, this wasn't a normal morning for her. She hadn't awoken in her own bed, for one. And she hadn't awoken in her own body either. Or maybe it was her body, just twisted and reshaped into the purple-red pony form that she found herself in. Was she still her on the genetic level? Or had her spirit been placed in this form? It didn't matter in either case, as Kate Beckett now found herself a talking pony sleeping in a replica of Richard Castle's loft.

It wasn't the physical changes that were causing her to lose sleep. She'd fallen into bed the moment Castle and her had gotten back, exhausted from the meet and greet which had quickly devolved into a Pinkie party. Even with all the sugar running through her body (apparently these ponies had such a high metabolism that they NEEDED sugar and sweets to survive...though Beckett doubted any of them ate quite like Pinkie Pie) she had been sent to the land of slumber the instant her head struck the pillow.

Beckett could admit that it was one of the better nights she had. With no case to keep her up and her current situation left up in the air till the Princess arrived, Beckett's mind had been able to drift into more pleasant dreams.

Pleasant...but strange...dreams.

Beckett had dreamed of her mother. That in and of itself wasn't strange; she often dreamed of Joanna Beckett, having dream conversations with her beloved mom. As silly as it was, Beckett found that those simple dreams, where her and her mother discussed simple things were the most peaceful images she could have. Ever since she had lost her that fateful night, when someone within the shadows had decided to snuff out her life in order to protect his own sins from ever finding their way into the light, Beckett had dreamed of her mother and it helped her feel at peace.

What had been different about the dream was her mother. It hadn't been the woman Beckett knew: a tall, regal yet humble woman with long brown hair and caring eyes. Yes, those aspects were there...only her mother had been a rust-covered pony, with a dove as her tramp stamp ('Cutie Mark' her brain whispered softly to her). They had been walking through Ponyville, discussing Beckett's visit with Twilight and her friends and what Beckett might do the next day. She'd awoken just as her mother nuzzled her check against hers, telling Beckett that she loved her.

The detective had smiled and enjoyed the lingering memory of the dream for 30 seconds before the startling realization that she had dreamed of her mother as a pony and she wasn't disturbed.

Beckett had sorted through her thoughts and what she found was...well, not disturbed, but off-put by the situation. First, it was easier for her to think of herself, Castle, her family, and her friends as ponies. Oh, she still had a clear memory of what she looked like as a human, as well as her mother or Roy or Ryan and Esposito. But it was so much simpler to think of everypony in pony terms. She could see Esposito with a Green Beret logo Cutie Mark and Ryan with a bottle of milk and some honey (and boy, would he hate that!). She could see Martha easily trotting about town, heading to Rarity’s show to get a new hat…it was freakin’ weird to see everypony she knew as ponies.

And that was the other thing: her vocabulary had been quickly altering to fit the Equestrian Standard, as she had come to think of it. It was somepony, not someone. Castle was a stallion ('Note, do NOT let Castle hear you say that') and she was a mare. She thought of Castle with his smug smile and annoying jokes and tried to call him a jackass in her mind, but all that did was conjure up images of mules.

'And why can't I swear?' Beckett thought to herself in annoyance. She was careful around Castle and would never do it in the bullpen like some female detectives she knew, always trying to make themselves seem tougher, but Beckett did have a bit of a potty mouth. Who didn't? But she couldn't even bring herself to say da...da...darn.

Beckett rolled her eyes. It was as if this body had come with a Disney filter!

Finally making her way out of bed, Beckett trotted into the bathroom to get ready to face the day. It was interesting just how similar her routine was in this form; somehow she was able to grip the brush with her hoof (she wasn’t even ready to try and figure that brainteaser out!) and get her mane free of tangles and her teeth minty white. Giving herself a once over in the mirror she didn’t know if she should be pleased or horrified that the pony staring back at her no longer startled her.

She found a small bathrobe and threw it on. She had gotten use to being naked rather quickly but that didn't mean she had to like it. Rarity had mentioned she was a dress designer; Beckett made plans to ask the pony to design some clothing for her. No shirts or pants, as it was quite clear that those were off the table, but perhaps a replica of her jacket...the tight leather one that she...

'No...not leather,' Beckett thought, realizing just how horrifying that might seem to the girls. That would be like asking a tailor to make a suit out of his neighbor. 'Maybe I should get something new, something different. If I am stuck as a different pony...person...I might as well enjoy it and live a little.'

Making her way into the living room, Beckett found that Castle was already wide awake and making breakfast while Twilight and her friends sat around, talking or helping where they could. Pinkie, while still bubbly and upbeat, was for once focused on her task of making some apple bread, while Twilight and Fluttershy listened in rapt attention as Castle explained how he got his muffins to turn out perfect each and every time.

"Well, mornin' sleepy head," Applejack said from where she stood, watching Castle work. "We thought ya weren't ever going to wake up."

"Leave her alone, Applejack. Just because some of us prefer to use a rooster to wake up doesn't mean there is any shame in getting one's beauty sleep," Rarity said from over the corner where she was admiring one of the sculptures Castle had.

Beckett walked over and nodded to each of the girls. "Sorry, didn't realize everypony would be up..."

"We decided to come early, that way we could get the day started," Rainbow Dash said. She was lying on the couch, her nose practically buried in the copy of 'Heat Wave'. "That way we can get the boring junk out of the way and get on to the cool stuff."

"Rainbow Dash, the museum is not going to be boring!" Twilight complained, her horn glowing as she set the table.

"Yeah yeah...I still say we should be showing off some more instead of visiting some dumb exhibit!" Rainbow Dash set the book down, her wings beating hard as she began to float up into the air. "Come on, wouldn't you rather see me show of some of my amazing moves, Kate?"

Beckett walked over to the kitchen, nearly crying in delight when she saw that, yes, Ponyville had coffee. Sure, she had to drink it from a straw, but the caffeine-goodness would perk her right up. "I'm sure there will be plenty of time to see the museum and your 'amazing moves', Rainbow Dash. Remember, we don't know how long Castle and I will have to wait before the Princess gets here."

Rainbow Dash, for her part, crossed her legs and let out a 'humpf'. "Geez, it’s like hanging out with my mom!"

"Considering my age, you aren't far off."

Twilight looked at Beckett, surprised. "You don't look that old, Kate. Even if you were a mother, you'd only have a baby."

Castle chuckled. "Don't be so sure, Twilight. We might look young but we are older than you think...my daughter is probably a few years younger than you." His horn began to glow and he moved a knife back and forth, spreading some creamy butter on the corn muffins he had made. He was quite enjoying having a superpower and was going to miss it once they got back home.

"You have a daughter?" Fluttershy said softly.

"Yeah, Alexis." Everypony could hear the fatherly pride that dripped off every word as he spoke his daughter's name.

"What is she like, Richard?" Rarity asked.

"Does she look like you?" Applejack asked.

"Does she have her cutie mark yet? What's her special talent?" Pinkie Pie asked excitedly.

"Do you think she'd like us?" Fluttershy said softly, scuffing her hoof against the floor.

Castle tapped his hoof against his chin. "Well...you six remind me a lot of her." He pointed at Twilight. "She is a dedicated student...always worried about her grades. I honestly don't know where she gets it from, because I was such a troublemaker." He gestured to Fluttershy next, then Rarity. "She is incredibly kind and generous...she'd rather see others happy before herself." He turned to Pinkie Pie and grinned. "But she is my daughter and she has a VERY playful side. Me and her play la...uh...tag all the time and she comes up with very creative ways to win." He turned to Rainbow Dash and Applejack. "She is also honest to nearly a fault...she hates to lie to me...and she will stand by a friend to the bitter end."

Castle paused and looked at Beckett. The detective was startled to find such emotion radiating out of his deep dark eyes; the power of it made her heart beat a touch faster.

"She's also a bit like Kate too."

Not Beckett. Kate.

"How so, Castle?" Beckett said, trying to sound flippant but failing to keep the soft whisper out of her voice.

"When she sees something is wrong...she never stops till it is corrected."

Beckett blushed at his words and was thankful her skin was its reddish-purple, as it hid her embarrassment quite well. She was so use to him joking and his cocky attitude...when he was like this it had the power to sweep her off her feet.

"As for your other questions..." Castle said, moving out of the way and letting Pinkie get the apple bread from the oven, "Alexis looks a bit like me but she has her mother's fiery red mane." Castle got a strange look on his face and Beckett nodded slightly in confirmation: he too was experiencing a change in his vocabulary. "She hasn't gotten her cutie mark...I honestly don't know what her special talent will be, because she can do anything." He paused, looking down at Fluttershy and gently nudging the side of her head with his. "And yes, she would love all of you."

"I hope we get to meet her," Twilight said happily, unaware of the flash of pain that went through Castle and Beckett when they thought of the possibility that THEY would never get to see Alexis, or any of their friends, ever again.

"Yeah...me too," Castle said, trying not to choke on the words. "Now then," he said, forcing himself to be chipper, "I believe breakfast is served!"

The girls quickly gathered around the table and began to eat. Castle and Beckett both looked at each other and silently shared the same thought: while this was a nice vacation, they needed to get home.

Comments

[defender2222]

A bit of a slower chapter, I will admit, but one needed in order to get the 8 cast members together and interacting under normal circumstances. This being MLP, of course things will go crazy pretty darn quick (there is a reason this has an Adventure tag!) and I wanted to show Beckett and Castle with the girls before the insanity begins.

[blazikenking]

1148713 I prefer to believe things went crazy the moment Pinkie Pie showed up. And it's a wonderful kind of crazy that she has.

[BenRG]

I found this chapter interesting because of Kate's.... well, the only way I can describe it as "change of mind". It must be a consequence of the transfiguration magic that turned her into a pony but I would be as disturbed as heck if my memories were scrambled that way.

[defender2222]

1150735
Yeah, it is part of the magic. Will be explained in later chapters how it happened and why it affected her mind.

[theepicartists]

awesome chapter!!! love it

[McPoopin]

I wouldn't mind seeing Alexis make a cameo at the end of this. She would probably implode seeing ponies.

[faren455]

Im not sure if this is funny... Or very dark. The way their minds are being edited to be more pony like, seems like conversion bureau disturbing. Then again it was written by you and everything you do is hillarious.