Mapping Manehattan

by The Red Parade

leaving

The elevator stopped working a long time ago. So instead they take the stairs. Their bags are full of tools and equipment, from first aid kits to compasses.

Both of them carry rifles as well, strapped across their backs. They haven’t had to use them in a long time. Lightning hopes someday they won’t ever have to again. They also each have a green book with a compass rose on the cover. Something to keep them busy.

The hotel lobby is cleaner than it was before, but still a mess: luggage carts are thrown against the wall next to the elevators; the red carpets are faded and stained.

The reception desk is battered as well. Red stains and bullet holes line the front, along with signs of hasty repair. But it worked, and that’d do.

A sentry is sitting at the desk. He looks up and waves to them. They wave back. A few other ponies are milling about. Their voices barely reach their ears.

One is lying on a stretcher while another tends to him. A stained bandage is wrapped around his leg. His breathing is pained, but he refused painkillers. They’re running out.

Outside, the courtyard is sealed off with a set of gates and fences. Patrols of sentries walk around, bored and waiting for the shift change. Bleary-eyed but alert, they barely notice Lightning and Fiddle pass.

A lever is pulled and the gates open. Fiddle and Lightning walk through, leaving their sanctuary behind.

The city waits for them. Veins mar the concrete roads. The streetlights stopped working ages ago. Plant life emerges from the cracks, sprouts of green among the black. Vines and bushes line the sides of the roads, spewing over the sidewalks and invading the streets.

An acrid, lonely stench hangs in the air, but it’s nothing new to them. It wasn’t going away any time soon.

The streets stretch off in every direction. The buildings tower over them, guardians of a bygone era. Their rooms are dark, and their windows are boarded. Whatever life used to be here is long gone.

Something moves in an alley, too small to be a pony. A raccoon, maybe. Or a dog. Lightning knows some of the hotel occupants have adopted strays. She hopes nopony’s allergic.

After a brief pause, Fiddle leads the way down the road, away from safety and into the city. Lightning follows.

She kicks a can that’s lying in the middle of the road. It doesn’t go very far. Fiddle laughs. As they pass it she picks it up, sticking it in her bag. Somepony at the hotel was collecting cans. Apparently they can make rope out of cans. Fiddle isn’t sure how.

They know they are safe for a few blocks. The sentry patrols make sure of that. The shops and restaurants here have been picked clean. The windows are shattered and their doors barricaded or kicked down. Shattered glass lines the floor in front.

This is their city. This is Manehattan.

Comments

[Smug Anime Girl]

YUS IT'S UP

[The Red Parade]

10115435
YUH

[The Red Parade]

10115458
Possibly? I only read one chapter of it. Was that also limited to specifics like mine?

[Mystic Sunrise]

Why only 500 words a chapter? I want to give this story a shot. But the short chapters are kind of a turn off for me.

And I've found that really short chapters are never a good sign for the story itself. Plus it feels like they're only this long, so the story gets by the 1000 word minimum to be allowed to be published in the first place.

[The Red Parade]

10115503
That's fair, but as I said in the description this story is meant to challenge me. 1,000 words are usually how long I shoot for anyways so there wouldn't be a point in setting that as my word goal. And contrary the word count hurt me because I want to do one chapter a week, meaning that in order to get the story published I had to break form and upload two to start with. If I wanted to do what you said then I would have picked 1,000 as my word count.

[Nitro Indigo]

10115476
It started off with short, vague chapters with no dialogue.

[The Red Parade]

10115564
Interesting, I guess they are similar then!

[EverfreePony]

10115503
If you want the word of one of the people who edited the story, then I can say this experimental piece fares really well despite the short chapter lengths. Atmosphere, lore, characters, it’s all there

[The Red Parade]

10115623
Thanks! Couldn't have done it without your guys's help!