Beneath her hooves the soft squelch of raw flesh and the occasional moan of pain and terror let her know that the interior of the castle was composed of the same materials that the exterior had been.
comma after beneath her hooves, because the phrase is to long and needs a break and that is the only place where it makes sense and maybe another one after terror
stretched betwixt bent and bloody bone
you either put betwixt between commas or rewrite the whole thing in a way that makes more sense
comma after beneath her hooves, because the phrase is to long and needs a break and that is the only place where it makes sense and maybe another one after terror
Fair enough.
useless comma is useless
Well it was a list of the things disorienting her like - this, that, and the other - but if you think it's unnecessary so be it.
and missing period is missing
Yeah...
you sure you don't want a comma after beauty?
It sounds right either way to me, but since it doesn't change the cadence I'll make the change.
i think that was supposed to be quite
comma after beneath her hooves, because the phrase is to long and needs a break and that is the only place where it makes sense and maybe another one after terror
you either put betwixt between commas or rewrite the whole thing in a way that makes more sense
useless comma is useless
and missing period is missing
you sure you don't want a comma after beauty?
10486476
Yup, sure was.
Fair enough.
Well it was a list of the things disorienting her like - this, that, and the other - but if you think it's unnecessary so be it.
Yeah...
It sounds right either way to me, but since it doesn't change the cadence I'll make the change.
Thanks
Welcome to Candyland
Yooo she has a castle out of suffering souls?