The Many Philosophical Musings of Gummy the Alligator

by Ironskull

This Is A Playdate?

Author's Note:

In addition to covering the episodes of the show, I also intend to insert an extra chapter after every 6 complete episode sequence from the show. Most seasons have 26 episodes, except for season 3. Most of the time those 26 episodes actually only 24 episode sequences because there are usually two merged episodes, one at the start, one at the end. The resulting 24 episode sequences per season leaves a number divisible by 6 with no leftover. In the event of a number of episode sequences other than 24, I'll probably round and either have a longer or shorter period between extra chapters than usual.

These extra chapters consist not of Gummy's thoughts about the events of episodes, but rather a brief chance to insert thoughts about whatever short original story I choose. They are all either stories about his interactions with the other pets, or one of his rare (rightly so) adventures that he goes on on his own.

Evidently, when two non-speaking creatures in Equestria communicate, they use a combination of audible and inaudible communication, for which the procedure varies from species to species, but it is understood by any creature regardless of their species. Unfortunately, for some reason or other, any species that has developed linguistic communication appears to lose their ability to interpret these more primal communications. For the purposes of making communication between two critters as clear as possible to readers, the intended meaning of their various complex signals to one another is interpreted into words. These 'sentences' between critters will be surrounded by apostrophes instead of quotations. Italicized sentences are reserved for Gummy.

When it comes to animals communicating with Gummy, he is still extremely subtle with his inaudible communication, which he uses exclusively, and the creatures he interacts with have a hard time reading him. As a result, they usually can only understand him about as well as Pinkie Pie can understand him, despite having an entirely different problem.

Theoretically, this means that if Pinkie Pie was to ever somehow acquire Fluttershy's ability to immaculately understand animals, she would finally be able to understand Gummy perfectly. Unfortunately, the odds of this happening are fairly low.

'I can't believe Rarity is forcing me to go on this... this... No, I refuse to even use the term!'

A certain bunny named Angel gave the irritated feline (whose name, of course, is Opal) a look of bemusement. 'What? Play date?'

'Yes! That! It's humiliating! I was just getting ready for a nice nap before she snatched me up, and I have no interest in this affair whatsoever!'

'Didn't you get enough sleep in your other five naps today?' asked Angel.

Opal glared back at the audacious bunny.

'Surely you agree at least that this is a waste of time?'

'Okay, yes, I'll give you that one. A toothless, brain dead alligator, a hyperactive dog, and a snooty cat! Why exactly do I need any of you! And there's no cushions out here! Couldn't she at least have given us some cushions! I mean, my house is right there!'

'You are such a hypocrite! You berate me for my naps, and yet you yourself cannot stand to be outside of your precious comfort?'

'Look, it's okay when I am the one complaining, alright?'

'You cannot possibly be serious!'

'I don't like this!' declared Winona, Applejack's pet dog with obvious unease. 'Why do you two have to argue? Can't we just play instead?'

Opal and Angel both gave Winona a look of annoyance. In Angel's case, however, this dissolved into a look of unhappy acceptance.

'Actually, I really don't feel like arguing with you. Prissy. So yeah, I'll play. For now.'

Opal hissed.

'Yeah, whatever,' continued Angel nonchalantly. 'Here, let me find a stick and we'll play fetch,' he said, now adressing Winona. The two ran off together at great speed, much to Winona's delight.

Opal looked over to the vacantly gazing gator.

'And what about you? Please tell me you aren't going to just sit here and stare at me. I know that I am gorgeous, but you are creeping me out.'

Gummy started to waddle off to watch the other two.

'Can't you move any faster?'

Gummy stopped, and then, after a moment, turned around to face the long haired cat.

The journey!

Opal actually flinched at the sudden and erratic motions from Gummy.

...

Opal stared at the gator in disbelief.

Is as important as the destination.

And then he continued his waddling.

He was content to spend the rest of the playdate watching Angel and Winona. No more harsh exchanges were made between any creature, and Opal even eventually decided to sit and watch beside Gummy.

She made a point of keeping a bored and discontent expression the entire time, of course.

Comments

[Ironskull]

I kid you not. I This is a project that I have been sitting on and working on for four years. It's not the only project I have like that either. One of these days the fans of my Discord Underground Talk Radio will have something to be very happy about. I hope. If there are any left. Anyway, there is a LOT more where this came from. I have chosen to release it up until this point so as to gauge people's reactions. If you want to know why I'm suddenly choosing to release it now, its because recent awful events in my life have left me brooding quite a bit, which when harnessed properly can be conducive to philosophy, and I used that state of mind to write quite a lot. Those events are also the reason I vanished from the site in the first place. This isn't the place to rant about that tho. I'll make a blog about it later.

So yeah, There's plenty of this already written, so you should be able to expect regular updates for at least a while. However, anybody that knows me knows that I have this incredibly annoying habit of disappearing for months without warning. But hey, I also don't leave any of my stories abandoned when I inevitably do come back.

RainEStar, I can see that you are still out here after all this time. Maybe you will stumble upon this by chance and get a surprise. I am seriously very sorry that it took this long to put this out, but if not for you then this wouldn't exist at all.

[IDontWatchMLP]

I like this... Good job.

[Ri2]

You tell her, Gummy!