Three Worlds

by CookiesOnFridays

Three Dimensions

(Authors note- This is my first third person view fic and this may be kind of random… But I gave this a little thought and I decided why not. This isn’t a serious story so don’t count on anything dramatic or awesome lol. There are ponies in this story, I have the indications down below.)

(*** means Team Fortress 2 POV, --- means Skyrim POV, [[]] means Ponyville POV)

Chapter 1- Three Dimensions

***

-At the Map Badwater Basin-

As a once famous scoot said, 'grass grows, birds fly, and brother? I hurt people'

That is the same concept here except, lets just say there is a lot of blood and less birds.

The beautiful mountain tops with their tint of brown, the small buildings and a tunnel that cuts right underneath a small hill. The rail tracks shimmering under the hot sun that leads toward an endless abyss. This was the perfect place for peace, quiet, and meditation... Except...

“Medic, Medic, Medic, Medic, Help me doctor-“

But it was too late as an arrow suddenly was implanted in the Sniper’s knee as he was trying to run back to spawn.

As for the red team who were defending, they were losing the battle. Already the blue team has pushed up the cart at a steady pace and with a spy going around sapping the Engi’s ‘dispenser’, all seemed lost.

The medic at spawn has brought half of his teammates back to try and make a battle plan, but everybody was excited because for dinner today, they had cream bacon with loads of sandvich’s and gravy.

“Everyone listen up!” The Medic said to the scunt, soldier, spy, and hoovy.

The Medic pulled back his gloves, “We need an uba to destroy all of the Blue Teams precious arrow snipers! This is truly embarrassing, we are getting beaten by nine snipers!”

“Well at least they have better aim then you!” The Spy said snorting and laughing.

“MEDIC! They have pushed the cart near final bomb station! We must push da cart!” The Hoovy said picking up his mini-gun.

The rest of the team nodded in agreement while the Medic started to charge up his Medi-Gun.

“Then let’s go practice medicine…”

The Heavy and the Medic burst out of the spawn room and Heavy Weapons Guy started firing toward the advancing enemy cart.

“Push up!” The Medic shouted over the gun fire.

As the pair advanced, the huntsmen snipers started to fall one by one, but both knew they would be back after the spawning time was over.

The Hoovy sneered, “Let us spawn camp!”

The entire team cheered with approval at they charged up the slope and charged alongside the tracks, all the while firing their weapons like idiots.

The Blue Team has spawned before Red Team has gotten there, but were quickly demolished by the new pride and spirit the Red Team had. With a final push and evil laughter the Hoovy fired his mini gun at the incoming Snipers.

“You are all baby men!” The Hoovy said while imitating baby cries.

From inside the Blue Team’s spawn came the sound of a yelling Sniper, “You’ve already lost Red Team! You didn’t know of our plans!”

With that the Hoovy stopped firing and took out his sandvich, “Vhat!?”

The laughter of Snipers came from inside of the Spawn was over welling, until finally someone cried out.

“We had a spy with us you dumb o’l twit! And he’s probably pushing the cart right about-“

There was a rather large explosion, bigger then there normally was coming from the Red Team’s base.

The Snipers didn’t seem to celebrate their victory but rather closed their spawn doors in a panic.

“Vhat is going on doctor!?” Hoovy said looking at the mushroom cloud.

The Medic’s jaw dropped to the floor, “I have no idea, but that must be the new bomb the announcer had in store for us!”

The rest of the Red Team were screaming and running around in a panic.

“I have an uber ready Heavy, we can do this!”

The Medic looked at the advancing cloud of dust and the rumbling sound seemed to get louder.

“Charge me doctor-“

The Medic had just enough time to release his charge before the explosion hit them. It lasted for only a split second and when everyone re-spawned, the Hoovy wasn’t there… As if, he was killed off entirely from the blast…

---

-(On Top of the Throat of the World)-

The sound of laughter and shouts rumbled across the mountain. An evil far greater then the creatures of the dark, are enjoying themselves... As the blizzard thickens, the ground rumbles like thunder, causing hundreds of citizens below to tremble with fear. The creature laughs and continues to drink, while a fearsome dragon rages on. The laughter goes on and on, like an old fairytale that seems to echo across the jagged snowy mountain top. The dragon finally let out another shout and blasted fire into the air.

The Elder Dragon laughed as he pounded the white snow with his big claws.

“Oh Dragon Born, you amuse me when you’re drunk! You could actually speak English.”

The Dragon Born took a swig of mead, “W-Well I got to tell you man, I have a new trick over here!”

The Elder Dragon looked at him with a curious face, “Oh really? What is that?”

“I-I could blast off across the world! But I need you to use your Fus Ro Dah-“

“Wow, wow, wow, I can’t do that. My shout is so strong, it’ll blast you out of this world-“

The Dragon Born just laughed like an idiot, “Don’t be such a party pooper Dragon buddy! Come on!”

The Dragon sighed and got ready for his shout, “Alright but don’t say I didn’t tell you so.”

The Dragon Born laughed and got ready as well. But before he could position himself correctly he took another swig of mead which was a big mistake.

The Elder Dragon already released his shout and the three words echoed across the mountain and blasted a drunken Dragon Born away. Far past the planet, far past space, and far past an orange planet that had seemed to have a big explosion.

[[]]

-(At the Tree House of Twilight Sparkle)-

The room was filled with the sound of popping bubbles all concentrated inside a test tube. The room was filled with tension as Twilight, carefully added another drop of yellow like liquid. Even the books that were everywhere, in their shelves seemed to hold their breathes.

But Applejack just had to ruin the tense moment like a cunt!

“I don’t know about this Twilight, are you sure this spell will make us well… More attractive?” Applejack said as she stomped her hooves against the floor of the tree house.

Twilight giggled and flipped through her spell book and potion’s book, “There’s nothing to be afraid of Applejack! I mean come on, this will make you girls superlicous! you will be well… What do did Rainbow Dash say?”

“She said SWAG which stands for Super, Wooper, Alooper, Great Party! We will have cake, cupcakes, cookies, punch, milk, and cupcakes, and cupcakes, cupcakes, cupcakes, cupcakes!” A rather pinkish pony said as she crashed through the front door.

Twilight lost her concentration and accidently poured the whole content of a white like fluid into the potion bottle. At first Twilight was skeptical about there being an explosion, but after a while nothing exploded. She just shrugged and started pouring the next few ingredients.

Another few moments passed, a rather white marshmallow colored mare trotted inside.

“I must say Twilight I can’t be thankful enough to see you doing this for us!”

Twilight just shrugged, “Well this is for you guys. I know that you all been eyeing that new stallion that recently came here so I was just thinking I could help you guys out.”

“O-oh that would be wonderful Twilight, I just hope he likes animals.”

“Well guess what Fluttershy, he’s going to be all mine! Who knew he could be hard working, attractive, and fast!”

Another two mares arrived both hovering as they entered the house of Twilight Sparkle. One was yellow and one was a rather rainbow like mare.

“Oh hey Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash, I’m just about done. I just need to add this little drop of spice and…”

Twilight concentrated on her magic as she dropped a single hint of a red fire like liquid and watched as it mixed inside the now shimmering potion.

“Done, now to just heat it up with-“

All the four mares dived for the chemistry tube filled with the shimmering liquid. Everyone besides Fluttershy and Twilight who was furiously trying to get a hold of her friends.

“Wait you guys, I’m not completely finished with it! If that somehow drops by accident it’ll create a whole different potion!” Twilight said as she tried to get a hold of the tube with her magic.

“Girls really, if you’re not careful then it’ll turn into-“

There was a crash and a crack followed by a large mist that seemed to spread like wild fire.

Applejack stomped her hoof on the ground, “See!? Now look what y’all done!”

“What we done? You’re the one who was grabbed it first!” Rainbow Dash yelled.

“It wasn’t me you idiot, it was Fluttershy!” Applejack retorted as she pointed to the yellow defenseless mare.

Twilight stepped in, holding a hoof against Fluttershy, “Fluttershy didn’t do anything! If you guys are going to fight like this, then I won’t make something like this ever aga-“

“Oh so now Mrs. Smarty Pants Who Can Make A Potion is joining the argument!” Rainbow Dash said as she gave Twilight a distasteful look.

The six mares were arguing without restraint, but what they didn’t know was they slowly started to disappear. First slightly fading, then see through, then completely invisible.

Nobody knows where they went, but when the six mares finally came to their senses, the world they knew, was far away throughout space.

(End Note- I think this was kind of cool but weird and random at the same time. Hope you guys liked my random fic? I guess you could call it random. More pony next chapter!)

Comments

[Svgb]

In their tongue he is Demo-kin, DEMOBORN.

A great start, let's see where this goes.

[Nazkan]

englishrussia.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/04/jet_train.jpg
Toot toot, all aboard Nazkan's review train. Yes, that is a jet, no, you don't have a choice, no, I will not be as kind as I can be and yes, there are snacks. Any more questions? No? Good, since this picture takes up 50% of the space I'm comfortable using, let's just cut to the bare bones.

Let's start with story. I find that on crossovers, story is always a good place to start. Now, I assume you already have a basic plan about what's going to happen next, along with how major plot points go, so I won't ramble on too long about that. However, I will give you some tips on writing crossovers, since I have seen people struggle with them before.
Firstly, KNOW YOUR UNIVERSES. This is very important. You need to know each of the worlds you're mixing to a tee. I don't mean a simple, oh, I have the gist of how everything works. You need to know everything about each universe you cross over. Insane level of details, like what kind of cheese Heavy uses on his sandvich, or the kind of tea Rainbow Dash likes. Before you write anything, you must know exactly how the universe works. This goes double for two universes and triple for three.
Second is, how do I say this, second is making sure that the universes you cross are compatible. That they meld well together. Obviously, if you're talented you can ignore this, since anything can work if it's written well enough. Case in point, Silent Ponyville. A game about a cursed town that psychologically tortures criminals and a show about technicolour ponies? Obviously these don't exactly belong in the same area of the video store. Since it's written decently though, it manages to overcome that gap. If the two universe don't mix in the first place, I.E MLP and Skyrim, the more effort needs to go in to make it work.
Thirdly, if you're doing it right, writing a crossover is going to be one of the hardest things you do. It should be physically draining getting everything to fit. As I've mentioned before, a barbarian who is used to solving problems with his sword isn't exactly going to adapt that well to a world without swords. You need to show this realistically.

Which brings me to my next point, showing. Once again, the saying 'show, don't tell' applies here. The very fact that you need a visual cue to show us that the scene has changed is a very very bad sign. You need to show us what the scene is, other than simply telling us what it is.
'-at the map BadWater Basin-' oh that would be very helpful, IF I KNEW WHAT MAP THAT WAS! You need show us what this map looks like, or even better, show us what the main character is seeing and feeling.
Have you ever opened a book and the front page simply said 'Frodo walked through the Shire and met Gandalf?' Of course not, you would throw the book away. The point I'm trying to say is, we need to know what everything looks like, but you can't simply tell us what it is. I know it's a little confusing, so I'll try to give you an example.
Give me a moment, 'Heavy rushed over to the balcony overlooking the drop sight. The flecking paint of the rail was the only thing betraying its true age as the Heavy pushed his gun over the rails. Beneath him, over a dozen people rushed around urgently, huddled together against a single bright blue bomb. The bomb itself was huge, easily the size of a full grown man, but Heavy paid no mind to that. The bomb was no news to him. With a shout, the sound of his prized minigun filled the air, cleaving through the cowards that had dared to try and destroy his company's work. A few tried to get a shot off on him, pulling the strings of their bows back in preparation, but nothing can outsmart a bullet.' See how that's more descriptive than simply, 'in Badwater Basin?' It really shows what you should be aiming for.
Again, explaining 'show don't tell' has never been my strong point.
You also switch tenses at random. Find a tense and stick with it. A little pre reading would be able to catch stuff like this.

Take a couple of peanuts out of the ash tray while I set up point three. There's still two paragraphs till the train stops.
Characterization is a tricky thing. I personally believe that this is because everyone sees a character differently. Is Rainbow Dash an egotistical braggart or a loyal friend who likes attention? All depends on how you look at it. The problem comes when you destroy such characterization as this. I can not for the life of me figure out a scenario in which the Elder Dragon would, even accidentally, kill the dragonborn. I cannot see a way in which Applejack of all ponies calls Fluttershy an idiot and I certainly cannot see a situation where everypony argues fruitlessly instead of figuring out what the potion did, if they're floating in space.
You need to revise your characters to fit canon better, because canon isn't gonna change to fit your characters. Really, pretty much everyone here needs a really deep look at how they've acted.

Author's notes now. You don't need them. Ever. If you need to say something to explain your story, than it should ALREADY BE IN THE STORY. There is literally no reason to have an authors note at any time, and if you do, it should be down here in the comments section.

Finally, just before the train stops and you get a chance to mope for a bit, just know that this isn't an attack against you. I review everyone equally, regardless of what they write or how old they are. Your story is simply one of many, and not a very good one at that. You can't just post anything you pull out of your ass and expect people to praise it, you need to work for those views.
Also, this is where I would usually welcome you to Friendship is Magic Fiction.com, but I see you've been here a long time already. So instead, take some peanuts, step off the train and let me set up your seat for the next writer.
Stopping at 'BetterStoryVilla, Australia.'
Nazkan

Edit: Please tell me that was some sort of 'so bad it's good' reference Svgb.

[[DJ_Pon-3]V_Scratch]

A drunk dovahkiin and an elder dragon fus ro dahing him?:twilightoopscan they do that? anyways here be a moostash for you

[Steel Redemption]

very well done....just know that im a nitpick bout TF2, so get your universes clear!

[CookiesOnFridays]

Lol thanks for the reviews. I'm not really taking this story seriously but seeing that the people make a big deal of crossovers, I'll try and up my game

[whiteportal117]

fus ro fuck yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!