• Published 29th Jan 2019
  • 3,526 Views, 54 Comments

Sour Sweetness - RisuUmbra

Anon has lived in Equestria for a while now and all he wants is Pinkie Pie’s love... too bad she hates his guts

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Chapter 5

Anon was relieved Pinkie was following behind him so she wouldn’t see his nervous expression, thoughts about what to do next once they reached the cafe shot through his mind at Rainbow Dash levels of speed which didn’t help him whatsoever so Anon decided to just get to the cafe first and go from there. The cafe was small and family run but it was a favorite of Anon due to its delicious grilled cheese that he orders whenever he needs to calm down which was the main reason why he chose the cafe in the first place. A quick glance behind him showed the target of his affections was looking away from him and was looking across the road where a few pegasi were arguing about something while standing on some low hanging clouds, planned weather was the first odd thing Anon had to get used to in Equestria but it didn’t take long for Anon to grow used to it as it had an establish schedule that he could work around which benefited him a lot when it have to his job. Turning back forward Anon saw that his destination was in sight which relieved Anon and he was about to pick up his pace when the loud crashing of thunder startled both him and Pinkie Pie making them whip back around to see what happened.

“False alarm move along” There standing in front of the once quarreling pegasi were two unicorn guards wearing the standard gold armor, but one of their armor was a bit burned around the edges. Seeing that it had nothing to do with Pinkie and Anon they hurried over to the cafe and sat down at one of the tables put out near the door, it didn’t take long for a young earth pony to come around and take our order. Anon ofcourse ordered a grilled cheese while Pinkie seemed hesitant to order anything so after a quick deep breath to stop his voice from cracking Anon told Pinkie that he would pay for their meal as he was the one to bring them there, it didn’t take Pinkie long to order a strawberry smoothie with extra whipped cream on top then the earth pony left with our orders leaving Anon and Pinkie alone to speak.

*ahem*”T-thank you again for agreeing to come speak with me… So I think we should talk about location first is that okay?” Looking up at Pinkie he could see her take a moment then nod and wait for him to continue to speak, taking another deep breath Anon entered the usual state of concentration he get when he’s working which made him voice lose its uncertainty and sound like a professional doing their job.

“So I was able to send out some letters to some of my usual locations to get some options on where we could host the meeting and I also mailed a few letters to some of my more trustworthy caterers who could help cook the food we plan to set out for the summit” When Anon finished speaking he looked over to Pinkie to see her reaction to his preparations and was shocked to see her mouth had fallen down onto the table giving Anon a whole new meaning to jaw dropping before snapping back up to her upper jaw and speaking.

“W-why would we need caterers? I always cook all the food need for my parties” Seeing Pinkie was confused by his actions Anon kept up his professional persona in an attempt to stay calm and focused.

“While you are very adept at cooking and baking I can have you doing that and exhausting yourself when I still need your help planning the whole thing, plus some of the guests are griffins so they might want meat instead of the regular pony fare” Anon thought his logic was sound and reasonable so he quickly moved on so he wouldn't second guess himself. Reaching down into his bag Anon pulled out four pictures and presented them to Pinkie.

”Here are the four locations I reached out to, first we have an open conference room thats in Manehatten which is pretty nice but is very strict when it come to their cleaning and security deposit so there is a bit of risk to choosing this one but it's a good fallback location, second is actually an open garden that´s in Hollow Shades that was recommended to me by one of my clients so I looked into it, third is a presentation hall in Baltimare that has complementary helping staff but they don't really care about your stuff because I came back with a few broken glass bowls from when they were helping me clean up so some caution is advised, and lastly we have the ballroom of Canterlot Castle that was offered to us to use when Spike told the Princess about his day and what he heard about our job, given the chance I would usually choose the castle but once we put tables and chairs and everything it still leaves a lot of open space that doesn't look right so we might be better off with one of the other choices” Finishing his spiel Anon glanced up at Pinkie to see her face stuck in a stunned expression and was about to try and snap her out of it but was interrupted by the server returning with their food which Anon realized he was starving for as he had forgotten to eat breakfast. The unicorn server sat Pinkie's smoothie down first then my grilled cheese and fries next and a few condiments before turning and trotting away while wishing us a good meal, Pinkie was gazing at her smoothie and was licking her lips in anticipation while Anon had taken his first bit of the sandwich which was just as melty and delicious as always but the fries had enough salt but not enough pepper so he grabbed the pepper shaker the server left and started shaking out a good bit to get my fries how he liked them then a small breeze blew by catching the small cloud of pepper and carrying it into Pinkie´s face just as she was gonna take her first lick of the whipped cream. Both Anon and Pinkie froze then Pinkie gave a small sniff which quickly escalated to a deep breath then froze then sighed in relief as the sneeze passed which make Anon sigh to.

”ACHOO!” With power equivalent to Rainbow Dash crashing headfirst into the ground Pinkie sneezed down into her smoothie launching it up at Anon and in a moment of pure panic Anon closed his eyes and ducked under the table as if this was Spike’s fire all over again. Anon felt the feeling of wind blowing over him and assumed it was the smoothing flying past him as terminal velocity and when the wind died down Anon peeked over the lip of the table and only saw Pinkie blowing her nose into a napkin and a empty cup with no spilled smoothie in sight. Anon was baffled, bewildered, and beguiled and was looking around and searching for the launched drink but was having no luck in finding it. Anon turned his attention back to Pinkie and deflated slightly when he saw the annoyed look she was giving her cup and by association him so Anon simply looked back down at his cooled sandwich at picked at some fries while Pinkie flagged down a server from inside who responded pretty quickly despite the sizable pile of dishes balancing perfectly on the earth pony’s back.

“Can I have another strawberry smoothie with extra whipped cream please?” The server winced at her request and seemed a bit hesitant to reply before take a quick breath and speaking.

“I’m very sorry but all the ingredients we use for the smoothies have run out regretfully… again I apologize” Anon looked incredulously at the server along with Pinkie and was about to ask where the rest of the ingredients went so early in the day but Pinkie beat him to it.

“How? It’s still early?” It was quite a sight for the famous nonsensical and logic breaking Pinkie Pie to look completely bewildered at the server until the server nodded their head towards the window, in sync both Anon and Pinkie turned and looked through the window into the cafe where they could see what looks like a grown stallion swimming in a giant glass cup full of strawberry smoothie and laughing all the while. Anon just took a deep breath and shook his head already used to the randomness of the world while Pinkie just huffed and waved the server away and turned her attention back to the pictures on the table then pointed to one with a hoof.

“Let’s just do this one, I have some plans later with my friends so I need to wrap this up” Anon deflated a bit at the news but nodded his head and collected the photos after marking the picture of Hollow Shades with a pencil then putting it back in his bag. Both rising from their seats Pinkie nodded goodbye to Anon while channeling her inner maud then turned and left leaving Anon behind to pay the bill, leaving the correct amount of bits plus a tip Anon took a deep breath in an attempt to release some of the disappointment in his chest before turning to leave himself. During his walk back home Anon tried to get rid of any disparaging thoughts about himself and focused on his next task which is writing up some letters to the gardeners and land owners of that garden in Hollow Shades.

Author's Note:

Sorry for the long hiatus and short chapter but a bunch of stupid stuff is happening in my life plus I’m getting ready for my finals so I’ll try and get some chapters out while I can
Sorry <3