It was the last week of term before the summer holidays, and I was rather excited. The year had passed so quickly it was unbelievable. It was Tuesday, and the entire college was having an assembly..at the same time..in the sports hall. It was for a good cause, but even so, I wasn't looking forward to sitting in a crowded room with twelve hundred other students for two hours.
Anyway, when I arrived at school, and sat down in the sports hall. I wasn't really expecting much to happen, I knew I'd be sitting there for a while, completely bored out of my mind, but even so, what was going to happen over the next few hours, was defiantly not what I was expecting.
After about an hour, I felt something tickling my left hand, I looked at it, but there was nothing there, so I ignored it, and just continued to listen to the head teachers speech.
After only a few moments, I felt another tickerling sensation, but this time in my right hand. As I looked at it, I saw something yellow spark from my finger before disappearing. I thought I was imagining things, so I ignored it. But before I could do anything else, I saw another yellow spark coming from my hand. I was completely confused, what was happening, was I imagining it, or were little yellow sparks flashing around my fingers.
I looked at the back of my hand, the day before I'd drawn my ponysonas cutie mark on it, mainly because I was bored, but it made me think. My ponysona could control electricity with ease, the yellow sparks I'd seen, looked a lot like electricity. Maybe I was dreaming, maybe this wasn't real life...
Before I had a chance to get my head around what was happening, the mark on my hand started to glow faintly, and then, after a few seconds a bright white light engulfed me and lightning sparked around it, I was scared, but it was so bright, i couldn't see what was happening.
After what seemed like for ever, but was only a few seconds, the light cleared. I was laying on the floor, and as I opened my eyes, I realised that my hair was draped across my face, but what shocked me, was that it was not light brown..but blue...I sat up and rubbed my head, but I couldn't feel my fingers, I looked at what I thought would be my hand, but was instead a..a..a hoof. I stood up slowly and looked at my back, wings, two blue feathered wings where folded against my sides. I glanced at my hip, and saw a yellow lightning bolt, that was slightly shaped like the letter 'Z', placed there, my cutie mark.
That's when I realised that everyone, even the teachers, where staring at me. I looked around, the people sat near me where edging away slowly. One of the boys who had been sat beside me looked up at me and spoke.
"What happened to you?" his friends where nudging him and telling him to move away.
"I---I don't know.." I mumbled.
I flapped my wings a few times and lifted off the ground. I flew around the hall and landed in front of my two best friends, they looked at me, confused. They where two of only five people who knew I was a brony, or pegasister or whatever you want to call them. They to were into the fandom, not as much as me, but, as far as I knew, they liked the show and all that. I looked at them, scared, worried, frightened. They knew who I was, they knew the pony I'd become. My ponysona, Zap.
"You better go." one of them said. "Before someone tries to catch you."
"I know but..What if I never see you again." I whimpered.
"It'll be ok." the other smiled. She hugged me tightly and I wrapped my hoof around her shoulder. "Just promise you'll return if you can." She whispered into my ear.
"I will." I replied, before letting go of her and taking off again. I flew across the room and towards the door, but before I left, I looked at everybody who was sat in the room, they where still staring at me, I saw a couple of people with massive smiles on there faces, I guessed they to, where bronies. I sighed before landing in front of the door, I opened it slowly, and walked out. I was expecting people to follow, but they didn't, no one did. I left the building and flew up into the sky.
Flying felt amazing, I was now very glad that I'd made my ponysona a Pegasus. At first I thought that flying would be hard, but I felt as if I 'd been able to do it all my life. I headed towards the main gate of the school. I didn't know what had happened, but I had a pretty good idea that the only way I'd find out, was if I left the school grounds and had a look around town.
I flew over the gates and followed the road towards my house. The streets where fairly quite, it was ten o'clock on a Tuesday morning after all. But the people who were there, looked up at me and just frowned, they obviously thought they where seeing things.
I reached the church in the middle of town, and landed on the top. There was an amazing view of the town from up there, I could see everything, the super market, the park, the schools...My house. I sighed.
I can't go back... I thought. If I do..What will my mum and dad think.. I looked at the sky, it was overcast, and rather chilly for the middle of July, It had been raining the day before, and the clouds were still rather grey, and I was hoping it wouldn't start raining again. I closed my eyes and thought. What do I do..Where should I go? As I opened my eyes, a white flash caught my eye. I turned my head and saw a very peculiar looking cloud, it almost looked 2D and was pure white, causing it to stand out against the others. I flew towards it, and as I came close to it, I could feel a strange energy flowing from the cloud, I touched it gently with my hoof, and a white circle of light started to appear slowly. When it stopped growing, I put my hoof in slowly, sparks of electricity flew down my leg and threw my body, causing me to pull my hoof back.
"What the.." I muttered. I swallowed hard and took a deep breath before flying though the light. Everything went white, then black, and then, I think, I passed out..
Oh this is going to be awful isn't it? My spidey-sense is tingling like a jackhammer dildo.
*Edit*
While the grammar and spelling are there. I'm going to have to agree with my spidey-sense. Why? Because, off the bat, you have your OWN self transforming.
Ay dios mio, it's going to be a self-insert isn't it? Yeah, self-insert fanficiton, especially when the main character is thrust into his role without any clear backstory, is never good.
"I chose to go, I had no choice,..."
Great start.
^
Lol
Well, nice written. I hope you'll approve. But i think that's why you are here ,).
Broly. Out !
1011212 My thoughts exactly, good sir.
1011213
Oops, I fixed it, it makes a little more sense now
1011212
Wait, what do you mean by 'my own self transforming' and 'self-Inserted'? All will be explained why she was sent. It's how I write and no one can change that, I like to keep people guessing, but apparently that's not really welcome on here, or at least not for the first chapter. I thought the title alone would with give people some idea...*sigh* I'm not taking this out on you, I'm just annoyed that no matter what I try I receive nothing but bad reviews, people trying to guess what's happerning before anything acctully happens.....
I just want to be able to write a decent piece of fanfic that people will like and enjoy, but apparently, I'm not even capable of that..
Again, I'm not taking this out on you, since I had a feeling you'd comment since I often see you on other people's work, but even so, why jump to conclusions? At least give me a chance to progress the story a little
1011256
Thank you. I will try not to disappoint :)
1011476 Firstly, I jump to conclusions to shave time off a story. And what I mean, is that your story began with no introduction to character or HER thoughts. It's just kind of like "Bam! I have a ponysona and I'm becoming her!" At least that's what I got from this. That, and you're giving away too much in the first chapter.
1011515
Well I guess that makes sense. But how am I giving away to much? I thought it was ok. Once I get the second chapter written and posted, then her character will be explained more, as will other characters that will be appearing. I have the majority of the story planned out, and I'm not changing it for one person. The cause for the transformation will be explained as well, just wait, you'll see
Why am I easily impressed by most every story I read?