Mechanic Hearts And Postage Stamps

by Ebony Runwick

Chapter 2, Ordering Stuff A Quality Time

The mare briskly trotted towards Gizmo’s Hardware store with her friend in tow. “Come on, you’re the one who wanted to go! Stop trudging behind you ol grump!” She chuckled, looking back at her companion.

“I’m not old!” The stallion protested as he trotted after her, his hoofsteps sluggish. “For your information, I haven’t slept in two days! So shut it!” The words had a slight bite to them, but he knew Ebony knew him well enough not to be hurt by it. He always got like this when he was tired. It didn’t stop him from staying up as long as he could so he could get his experiments done though.

As predicted, the mare didn’t even flinch as they neared the automatic doors which opened without a word. Inside were all sorts of tools, materials, and other goods anypony would need for all kinds of jobs. “Well, here we are! Now, what materials do you need again? Hopefully nothing dangerous this time around…” Ebony eyed him carefully, looking at his prosthetic leg.

“Don’t give me that look.” He shot a tired glare at the mare, huffing as he slipped past her. “It was one time Ebony, and that’s because I stayed awake for two whole weeks straight and could barely see and hear straight, let alone be aware of the table saw right next to my leg. Besides, it’d be an improvement anyways. Robot legs are much better.” He spoke as he walked, perking up slightly as he scanned the aisles for the materials he’d need.

She shook her head. “Aaaand this is why I’ve been trying to get you to eat and sleep more often. Because this stuff happens when I don’t.” Shaking her head again she walked behind him, grabbing some things she needed herself along the way and adding them to the cart. “Super super glue, new toolbox, drywall screws… Where the hell are the rotor blades?!” The pegasus huffed in anger.

Circuit snorted softly, trotting off as he left her to find her things. He grabbed his own cart before wandering about the aisles, grabbing the things he needed. He also tossed in whatever things he might need, and whatever just looked interesting. He hesitated a bit before snatching up a new saw blade, shoving it in the bottom of his cart in hopes that Ebony wouldn’t see it. This wasn’t the first time he’d tried to buy a new one, the old one was covered in blood now after all, and with his luck it, probably wouldn’t be the last.

She finally found all of the things she would need for her sister as well as some other things just to be safe all while staying under her budget. As if she needed one but still, nice to be careful and all that. With the last of her work done and everything checked out the mare began to walk over and look for her companion. Ebony found him in the blade section, shoving said saw blade into the bottom of the cart. “Hmm, looks like someone’s trying to be sneaky~!”

“Oh come on Ebony!” He whined, sounding more like a young foal rather than a twenty something year old stallion. “I need a new saw blade! You can’t keep me from getting a new one forever! Would you rather a use the old rusty one that cut off my arm, or a brand new safe one that won’t cut off any of my appendages?” She sighed and rubbed her temples with her hooves before replying in a tone that reminded the stallion of a mother.

“Don’t make me regret this, be good, be safe, if you get hurt I swear I will fill you with so much laughing gas that you’ll be loopy for weeks.” And on that note, she threw in a pair of safety goggles, heavy duty edition. Circuit just rolled his eyes, letting out a soft snort.

“Yes mother...I’ll be careful. I’ve already realized that trying to stay up for two weeks straight is a bad idea, you don’t have to remind me. Now c’mon. I need to talk to the owner about ordering some specialty parts.” The mare rolled her eyes but smiled all the same.

“Yeah yeah, hurry up. I know how you get when you want your experiments to work so just get on with it, I can wait.” She shook her head to clear it before picking up a magazine from the register area and flipping through it. The stallion simply huffed and trotted off to go speak with the owner, blathering on about various machine parts and what not until he finally got shooed off so the manager would tend to more customers.

“All right, the parts are all ordered. Let’s finish paying for this stuff and then we can go.”

The pegasus looked up from the magazine and put it down before walking over. “Yeah alright, let’s get going, I have an idea…” Ebony’s face turned into one of a maniacal, mad science look that only occurs when the mare has a devious plan that usually involved frilly things and dresses.

“No...No no no no!” His eyes got wide as he frantically pushed his cart over to pay for his things. “You’re not putting in one of those...Those torture machines again! I’m paying for my things and then I’m going home and there’s nothing you can say about it.” As he finished paying, the mare crept up behind him, grabbed him by the tail, and promptly began dragging him in the direction of a small beauty parlor that sold dresses of all kinds.

“Help! I’m being kidnapped! This mare is crazy! She’s gonna murder me!” Despite his frantic shouts it didn’t bring him any help. All it got him were a bunch of strange, and sometimes amused, looks. “You’ll pay for this Ebony! I swear it!”

“Again with the payback? You know I’m going to get my way you dork. I always do~!” She giggled despite having his tail between her teeth. As the door to the store opened, she dragged her friend inside and promptly shut the door. A tan unicorn with pale purple mane and tail as well as a sewing needle and thread cutie mark blinked from behind the desk.

“Um… Hello there…” Ebony waved before motioning to her friend.

“Little bit of a fashion emergency, don’t mind us.” With that, the mare promptly set down a few bits on the counter, making the owner go quiet.

“Help yourselves please.” She said before walking into a back room.

“This is cruel and unusual punishment! You can’t do this to me!” The gray coated stallion continued to flail his arms and whine, dragging his hooves across the ground as he attempted to get a grip. He clung to the doorway to the back room, gripping it as firmly as he could.

“Quit your whining, your gonna look great! Maybe we can find a nice stallion for you ey?” She winked back at her friend before giggling to herself at that. The owner left them to their own devices as Ebony quickly began to ruffle through the shelves of neatly hung dresses.

“You, sit, good grumpy stallion.” The mare pointed to a raised platform surrounded by mirrors. Said grumpy stallion did as he was told, though the look on his face made it clear he wasn’t happy about it whatsoever.

“I’ve told you before Ebony, work is the only stallion I need. And we’re in a happy, monogamous, marriage.” He pouted as he spoke, crossing his arms in front of him. The mare looked back at him and raised an eyebrow before looking back through a particularly frilly section of the dresswear.

“Sureeee, and my name is Shirley Temple!” Ebony let out a snort and picked out a dark purple one with silver ruffles on the bottom and long billowing sleeves.

“No.” Circuit said immediately, barely giving the dress a once over. “You know I hate things with billowing sleeves, they get in the way of everything. If you’re going to make me do this, then at least pick something more my style.” She huffed in annoyance before replacing the dress in favor of a black one that was sleek and the arms came down to the elbow. It was a bit slinkier, and made of soft fabric that was stretchy.

“Alright, how about this one Mr. Picky?” Ebony asked with a sassy head bob to the side.

“No. That one’s too slinky, you know I don’t have the proper figure for that. I’m a stallion, not a mare. It’d look good on a mare like you, not a stallion such as myself.” He let out a soft scoff, rolling his eyes. The mare facehoofed a facehoof that was so perfect, it would go down in history as the best facehoof ever. She let out a small sigh before returning the dress back to its spot. Digging through the shelf, Ebony finally found one that she liked, it was deep green with a few ruffles on the bottom, high sleeves, and silver linings on the bodice. Circuit carefully scanned over the dress, sighing as he realized he couldn’t find any faults with it. Well, aside from the fact that it was a dress, but he knew Ebony wouldn’t care if he protested.

“Fine, I’ll put it on. Now shoo, I’m not dressing in front of you.” He shooed the mare out, remembering the last time he’d attempted to put a dress on. He’d ended up tangling himself in the blasted thing, and it took Ebony along with a few of the ponies in the shop to get him out of it. There was no way he’d let her see him struggle with it again.

The mare squealed with delight before rushing out of the room to find some ribbons and accessories to go with the dress. Score one for Ebony! She thought with glee at getting her stallion friend into a dress yet again. Circuit just let out a fond sigh, certain he’d never understand his friend's strange obsession with putting him in drag. One of the many things he’d never understand about her really. He shook the thoughts out of his head, turning to narrow his eyes at the dress in front of him.

“Guess I have to put you on….Stupid…” He continued to mutter as he pulled the dress on, letting the soft fabric billow around him. “This better be worth it...Crazy mare…”

Author's Note:

Hey hey! Enjoy another chapter! Feedback is always welcome! :3