My name is Nox. I am an immortal necromancer, once slave of King Sombra, now free. I was once human, a species unheard of here in the land of Equestria. I am the only one here that I know of, brought here after buying a costume from a Merchant. This
So I guess someone collapsed the ceiling on her, and a reanimated zombie (her sister? If so she has one really fucked up family tree.) dug her out... Umbra got a room and the butler almost died... To top it all off the guard is just having a WTF moment.
All in all I feel like this was rushed. There is almost no explanation for what is going on, and this feels like a filler chapter. No story progression, no bonding between Umbra and our Protagonist, and needless gore.
Now for Questions: Who is the half pony half dog thing that tried to dig our protagonist out? Why did the ceiling collapse? Is Umbra bipolar? (going from crying and screaming mommy to having a smile on her face when she rips her 'mommy in two is kind of disorienting) Why did she save the butler? (if she is too close to anyone when she revives doesn't she kill them and take their lifeforce?)
6342099 I will admit, it probably is a bit rushed. As for being filler: It helps me get someplace, as I have stated before I started this story without any real direction and posted it before I could talk myself out of writing. (I would have.) That being said most chapters.... are technically filler. It is the monster calling her sister, not a zombie. (I guess I didn't write that in well enough. Eh, Live and learn.) Now to your questions:
1. You will learn soon enough. Because this WILL BE explained and people may wish to hit me upside the head for it. 2. It will be explained. 3. I'm not saying. 4. This I will explain, though it is technical and might not actually be touched in the story. Reviving is a slow process, depending on the damage. Where Nox was stuck would have prevented her revival from happening, so until she was dug out she couldn't revive. So aslong as she wasn't unburried before he was removed there was no danger of her draining him. And as she was dead, the living would take first priority. Plus Nox values life, she doesn't like innocents being killed.
I have a problem with the idea that anyone could be prepared for this, seriously if I was one of thoes guards I think Umbra was Damian, or possessed by King Sombra's ghost. I mean she ripped the corps of her dead mother and started dancing with it. I'd be almost positive she was nuts. Also why was Umbra freaking out in the first place. If she didn't care that her mother died again she should have been creepily calm. Unless this was the point where Umbra went off the deep end
this is just confusing
So I guess someone collapsed the ceiling on her, and a reanimated zombie (her sister? If so she has one really fucked up family tree.) dug her out... Umbra got a room and the butler almost died... To top it all off the guard is just having a WTF moment.
All in all I feel like this was rushed. There is almost no explanation for what is going on, and this feels like a filler chapter. No story progression, no bonding between Umbra and our Protagonist, and needless gore.
Now for Questions: Who is the half pony half dog thing that tried to dig our protagonist out? Why did the ceiling collapse? Is Umbra bipolar? (going from crying and screaming mommy to having a smile on her face when she rips her 'mommy in two is kind of disorienting) Why did she save the butler? (if she is too close to anyone when she revives doesn't she kill them and take their lifeforce?)
6342099
I will admit, it probably is a bit rushed. As for being filler: It helps me get someplace, as I have stated before I started this story without any real direction and posted it before I could talk myself out of writing. (I would have.) That being said most chapters.... are technically filler. It is the monster calling her sister, not a zombie. (I guess I didn't write that in well enough. Eh, Live and learn.) Now to your questions:
1. You will learn soon enough. Because this WILL BE explained and people may wish to hit me upside the head for it.
2. It will be explained.
3. I'm not saying.
4. This I will explain, though it is technical and might not actually be touched in the story. Reviving is a slow process, depending on the damage. Where Nox was stuck would have prevented her revival from happening, so until she was dug out she couldn't revive. So aslong as she wasn't unburried before he was removed there was no danger of her draining him. And as she was dead, the living would take first priority. Plus Nox values life, she doesn't like innocents being killed.
Hopefully this answers.... the one thing XD.
I have a problem with the idea that anyone could be prepared for this, seriously if I was one of thoes guards I think Umbra was Damian, or possessed by King Sombra's ghost. I mean she ripped the corps of her dead mother and started dancing with it. I'd be almost positive she was nuts. Also why was Umbra freaking out in the first place. If she didn't care that her mother died again she should have been creepily calm. Unless this was the point where Umbra went off the deep end
Not bad, but yes, a bit rushed. Will keep watching. Good job so far!