A Start
There in the middle of the street stood a figure shrouded in a hood. It did not pay attention to the people around it, it was busy looking at the black parchment in its hands. And the people passing by did not take notice of the hooded figure, nor did they think why they walked around a certain spot on the crowded street. The only reason why they did not see Him was not their own fault, however their brains refuse to believe that He is there because of what He is.* Of course Death could reach out and touch them or talk to them, then they would see Him but not clearly, afterward they would forget the encounter. No, He was busy, and sooner or later He will be needed elsewhere.
Checking His list, He crossed out the names of the people He just visited. He then placed the last empty Life timer back in to his robe. The List was complete for now, so now He will return home. With a voice that would enter the head, but would not be heard with ears, He called His horse, "BINKY COME HERE." There was a flash and a clap of thunder, A tall grey horse appeared, it thundered down the street, leaving glowing hoof prints in the ground. Of course, no one notice the horse that appeared from nowhere, because horses do not appear from nowhere and leave glowing hoof prints.
Death then mounted Binky, then patted the horse on the neck, "WE ARE GOING HOME." He then took up the reigns and gently spurred the horse forward. The horse and Its rider galloped thru the crowd and a couple walls,** before rising into the air as if riding on top a invisible hill. With a flash, they disappear into time and space, heading toward Death's Domain.
Somewhere along the way, a rock or meteor became more real than its surroundings, either by chance or for it simply willing itself to be more "real" than it should be. Binky stumbled off of this meteor, unprepared for this minor bump, Death was thrown off of Binky. As He tumbled into time and space, all He could say was,"OH DEAR" Then Death was lost to the world.
Death fell between the Inner working of the universe, with its streams of energy, pulsing light, and intricate working arrays, He only sighed, if He could sigh.*** After what seems to be hours, or years of repeating patterns and lights, Death hit water... well fell into water. What He could see, He fell into a pond. It was a clean pond, you could easily see in it, not like a normal pond, where the water was muddy, and smelled fishy. No, it was just clean, and pleasant to be in, plus He did not know what it smells like; since He did not have a nose. After walking along the bottom of the pond and onto the shore, Death found Himself in a forest.
After getting the water out of His robes, Death had a looked around the forest. It seemed peaceful with its elm and Maple trees. It disturbed Death, at first He thought this world was run by the Auditors. As the world seems to be organized, but He reminded Himself that the Auditors did not approve of Life, as it was unpredictable. To Death, the forest was disturbing; because of the fact that a path cut cleanly thru it as if the path had always been there, the trees were comfortable spaced apart to feel open, none of the Autumn leaves fallen yet, and there some or no underbrush. It felt more like a park then a forest.
Death picked up His scythe, its edge glowed an eerie blue color. He then chose a direction of which would lead to civilization. Death then pondered while walking down the path, what world He has landed in, He did not feel the heart beat of Great A'Tuin, the giant space faring turtle. So He was not longer on Discworld, so maybe He is on an ordinary boring spherical shaped planet.
Death left the forest behind and entered an open field, He stared at the small village before him, exactly for an hour, not a second more or a second less. The Colors were bright and did hurt his eyes, Compared to Ankh-Morpork, the small village was a clean as His home. In Ankh-Morpork, dirt, dust and filth covered the buildings, the streets, and the people, The river was so muddy, it was thought to flow upside down. Here the buildings were clean and bright with color, the streets spotless, and the people came in many an array of pastel colors. Well the people were ponies, but that did not bother him, What bothered Him was that it felt like it was a from a children's story. It did not have the detail of the reality of a normal life, it was innocent, free of poverty, free of crime, and the harshness of life. It was too Lively, He did not trust what He is seeing.
Death wonder if this was some joke that the Higher-ups pulled on Him. That meteor was too convenient, Death expected a Voice to greet Him and tell Him why He was here. They could be letting Him go... again. It did happen before, when the Higher-ups forced Him into retirement. There was a farm nearby, and He did ended up working on a farm last time. As for the ponies, life could take any shape, as it was unpredictable. Although it would be hard to use tool with only hooves. Death looked at His hands while He spun the scythe around.
Death wondered how life evolved to this point, He thought about how such being would go around inventing things. They must have magic, He could feel it in the air. If they know magic they could send Him back to Discworld, or at least point Him toward the right direction. The He pondered on how to approach the ponies without scaring them silly, He already has no trouble scaring people back at home, He was a walking skeleton. As Death pondered about His predicament, a cyan blur dove at His head.
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*Normal people do not wish to see Death walking around them.
**Death and Binky could walk thru walls and other objects because they are more "real" that the ordinary things around them, thus ignoring what would normally be consider obstacles.
***He already seen it, since the Beginning in fact. Also He would need lungs, a mouth and other things to sigh.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I do not own My Little Ponies, nor Discworld, they Belong to Hasbro and Terry Pratchett respectively.
This is relevant to my interests
Awesome. As a fan of Discworld, and the character of Death especially, this story just promises great things. Keep it up.
Wow...I must say, of all the crossovers I've seen in this site...this is a unique one if I ever saw it, and I'm liking it.
She really needs to watch where she is going...
Was that who I think it was who just ran into Death?
> If it was not a disc that is supported on the backs of four elephants which, in turn, stand on the back of a giant turtle, just a regular boring spherical shape planet.
I'm not sure that sentence makes sense. Perhaps remove the word "if"?
Needs moar footnotes
lol but this is pretty cool, cant wait to see what happens next. Dash?
I didn't even read this and I like the idea of MLP + Discworld!
Hows is my favorit char??? its DEATH dont mess this up ok
Good Luck ^^ and make it Awesome
i know next to nothing about discworld but i love this concept
oh this looks like fun
You've got some run on sentences, and some words are capitalized that don't need to be, but other than that its good so far.
530599 If you are talking when I capitalize "Him" Terry Pratchett makes all direct written references to Death are proper nouns. Of course he only did that in two books, but I think that will make Death stand out. But on the other hand, many of the other character that I will place into the story are mares. I know I have some run on sentences and if there are other words that are capitalized. For that, I am sorry but I did write this story in a spur of the moment deal, at 1:00am last night. So there bound to be many mistakes,
Other than that, Thanks.
530736 Are you referring to his portrayal in Color of Magic and Light Fantastic? He's much different in later books, especially Reaper Man.
Is it too much to hope for other Disc regulars to appear? Vimes? Granny? Rincewind?
The errors can be fixed easily, since there's nothing wrong with the content.
this seems like a great concept, but i think you need to fix it up a little. It feels a little fast.
I'm gonna be harsh. I'm also going to be nice.
Go read more Terry Pratchett. He is one of the great masters of the English Language of our age.
What you have here really didn't capture Death's feel. Re-using references to 'real' is one thing. Instead, try and use something akin to 'the stone buildings wouldn't be there in a thousand years anyway, so didn't matter much.' For another, staying on Binky's back is a matter of Binky's will, not something that can be accidently lost. The Auditors aren't in so much for rules as they are predictability, and hating things that don't have material existance (eg friendship). Lastly, what's with Death judging how 'right' the scenery is?
Further, be more consistent with verb tenses. That'll make the whole thing read better.