The Heist
The man known to his fellow henchmen as Number 5 stared silently out of the window, gazing across the street at the Gotham Conversion Bureau. More specifically, he was peering down at the roof of the building, the place he and Number 4 would soon be zip lining across the busy road to in order to complete their parts of the plan.
He looked back at 4, noting with satisfaction that he had already loaded his weapons and had prepared the launcher. Stepping back from the window, he gave 4 enough space to smash out the glass with a blast of highly compressed air, before clearing the remainder with the butt of the launcher.
After attaching the cable, he lined up his shot, the roof appearing in the sights. Firing the cable across, he gave it a few tugs to make sure it had secured itself properly before he grabbed his bag and clipped it and himself onto the wire. 5 quickly followed suit, and they were soon gliding over the busy street below, their bodies dangling by their clips and carbines as they sped across the gap between the buildings.
Thankfully, none of the pedestrians or people in any building seemed to pay them any mind, which let them drop down onto the Bureau’s roof without even a whisper of trouble.
After skidding over the gravel surface of the rooftop, they unclipped themselves and immediately began their assigned work, with 5 heading over to the electrical box near the entrance to the building’s interior while 4 watched over all of the places an errant civilian could enter and ruin their element of surprise.
“So why do they call him the Joker?”
“I heard he wears makeup”
“Makeup?”
“Yeah, to scare people, y’know, war paint”
Having timed their arrival as close to when they would be needed as possible, 5 found the silent alarm activating just as he smashed open the box’s panel. After quickly shutting it down and doing the same to any other systems that could jeopardize their mission, he mentioned the peculiar nature of the silent alarm’s intended destination.
“That’s funny, it didn’t dial out to 911, it was trying to reach a private number.”
4 looked over from his spot near the door. “This place is practically run by terrorists and their supporters, and you expect them to ask human cops for help?”
“Whatever. Lets get downstairs.”
He stood up, collecting his equipment as he went before he walked to the door, opened it and began to descend the stairwell. Hearing 4 close the door behind them, he pulled his pistol from its holster, not knowing if the others had been successful in their part of the job, despite the clear advantage that surprise and guns gave them over the guards.
Seeing the light pouring from the bottom of the stairs, he reassured himself that his comrades would in fact be waiting for them. Taking a deep breath, he calmed his nerves as they approached the doorway.
“Here we go”
Joker grinned behind his clown mask, it was almost as if they wanted someone to break into their Bureau. There was less than half a dozen guards in the entire building, all but one of which was stationed by the entrance to the building.
It also helped that they were only ponies with spears, as opposed to the three clowns who each carried some form of automatic weapon, be it a SMG or pistol.
Stepping out of the car they had pulled up to the bureau in, the Joker and henchmen each drew their weapons, holding them at their sides while they approached. 2 and 3 each held Mac-11’s while the Joker himself carried a Glock18, the fully automatic machine pistol holding more than enough rounds in it to dispose of any enthusiastic guards.
Pushing their way through the front doors, the clowns held the surprised guards at gunpoint, forcing them into one big huddle before 2 pulled grenades from his belt and mushed them between the hooves of each guard before pulling the pins and leaving them to group together in terror, clutching the explosives and the safety catch together tightly.
Leaving the guards to themselves, Joker and the other two ran past several offices in the middle of the open bureau before they got to the main lobby of the facility, through which every other major area could be accessed.
Firing several rounds into the air to gather the attention of those ponies and the occasional human that were gathered in the lobby, they rushed to subdue the remaining guard.
Grabbing the armored unicorn by the horn, 3 dragged it out into the open where he hogtied it with a couple zip ties. Now panicking at the sight of three armed humans bursting in and attacking their guard, 3 fired a dozen rounds into the ceiling and walls around the crowd, shouting at them to lie down on the ground.
Joker started putting grenades into the hands or hooves of those on the ground while 2 dragged the employees hiding behind counters out onto the floor. He then began to do as the joker was doing, putting grenades into the care of ponies and humans all around.
“We don’t want you doing anything with your hands, now, do we?”
3 walked along the group of terrified captives, making sure that they were no longer a threat. He had just smacked the remaining guard back to the floor when a blast of buckshot from one of the nearby offices knocked him off his feet and onto the floor, dead.
As a red unicorn with a brown mane walked out of his office, a sawn-off shotgun being held in his magical grasp, he shot again, though this time at 2.
2 had to scramble from cover to cover, dodging the heavy lead shot coming from the quickly advancing unicorn, before he made it behind a table with Joker.
Having tried to keep track of the number of shots that had come from the shotgun so far, he looked over at Joker and asked, “He’s out, right?”
Joker looked off into the distance for a moment, trying to recall how many times the unicorn had shot at them, looking back at 2 after a moment’s deliberation and nodding.
2 stood up to shoot the pony, but was caught by a blast of lead firing out of the shotgun, catching him in the shoulder, the kinetic energy knocking him off of his feet.
Thankfully for them that had been the unicorn’s last shot, the gun, not having another shell to load, was indeed empty, the sound of the empty breech opening and closing as he pumped it being heard as he tried to load the weapon.
The room was once again filled with the sound of gunfire as the Joker stood up and let a salvo of bullets rip from his pistol, the fast automatic action burning through many rounds before he released the trigger.
“Where’d you learn to count?” 2 angrily shouted, looking at his injuries as he rose to his feet, though fell silent once he saw the severely wounded unicorn sprawled out on the floor, seemingly satisfied that the one who had shot him had been repaid in kind.
“Watch them, I’ll go check up on the other guys.”
As soon as 4 and 5 exited the stairwell, they made their way over to the room containing the Conversion Bureau’s vault.
Staring at the massive steel door for a moment, 4 was broken out of his stupor by 5 nudging him forward, towards the safe. Setting his bag of equipment down next to the safe, he pulled out his drill, placing it against the spot of the thick door that he knew contained most of the mechanisms that held the door closed.
He was actually glad that the boss had told him at the last minute not to shoot 5, after all, he felt much safer with someone watching his back while he worked. He had gotten nearly all of the way through the door when he felt a blinding and burning pain shoot through his body.
Before he could figure out what had happened, he found himself lying on his back with 5 staring down at him.
“You okay?”
“Y-yeah”
“Damn, they must have electrified the thing!”
“Not a problem, at least not now that I know 'bout it.”
4 quickly put on rubber gloves before he continued, the drill going through all the way after only a few more moments of drilling, though this time without 4 being electrified.
He removed the drill from the door before spinning the various wheels and knobs that unlocked the door. Just as he went to spin the last part of the vault’s lock, he heard someone running towards them.
He and 5 pulled their guns and prepared to make whoever came through the door look like Swiss cheese, though refrained when they saw that it was only 2. He stopped in front of them, observing the singed nature and spiky appearance to 4’s hair before he pulled a fold-up lorry from his duffel bag, the small, wheeled platform looking to be the perfect size to stack on boxes or crates.
“Hey, they wired this thing up with, like, 5000 volts! What kind of place does that?”
“An alien terrorist organization’s body-swapping clinic. Guess the Joker’s as crazy as they say.”
As 4 gripped the final wheel and spun it, he turned back to 2 and asked, “What the hell is even worth enough in a Conversion Bureau that it has to be locked in this kind of vault?”
“That” 2 said as the door swung open, revealing several rows of crates stacked several high and marked with several numbers and letters underneath the title ‘batch code’.
“Is this for real?” 5 asked.
“Are we seriously going to steal a bunch of ponification potion from a Bureau?”
“What did you think we’d be stealing?”
“I don’t know, maybe some of that equestrian money made of gold, but not this!”
"Well then, you can go walk your sorry ass out of the building and be on your way if you don’t want your share.”
“…Fine, lets just get this shit out of here fast.”
“That’s the plan! Now, grab some crates and get a move on.”
Waiting back in the lobby, the Joker looked over to the hallway that 2 had disappeared through to see him, 4 and 5 walking out, each with several crates stacked in their arms, or in 2’s case, being pushed along on a small lorry.
They stacked all of the crates in the center of the large, open room before going back for more, their clown masks bouncing up and down on their faces as they jogged back to the vault.
“W-what are you doing with that!” one of the ponies hiding behind their desk shouted at Joker.
“Nothing that concerns you, little horsey.”
“H-horse! How dare you!” She stood up from behind her hiding spot, though she was quickly forced back down when the Joker walked up to her and stuffed one of his many frag grenades in her mouth, silencing and terrifying the pony.
She whimpered and whinnied through the explosive gag, but that just made the raving psychopath next to her giggle insanely, reveling in the sounds of her fear.
Hearing the others coming back with more of the crates, he went back to supervising the rest of the hostages, sweeping back and forth over them with his G18 while he looked for any others he would have to ‘discourage’ from causing problems.
After they had taken a few minutes to empty the vault of all of the crates, even the ones labeled as experimental and specialty, they were waiting for their form of transport to be revealed.
“How the hell are we going to fit all of this in the car?”
“We’re not, dumbass. Boss called us in a nice ride, one that won’t be tracked and will have more than enough room for all this.”
“Well then, where is it then?”
All of a sudden, the wall of the building closest to them exploded, the back end of a yellow bus crashing through the debris until it came to a stop just a few yards away. The back door of the bus opened and another guy in a clown mask popped out, remarking “That’s a lot of potion…”
“Yeah, well, lets hurry up and get it in the bus!” They moved quickly, passing the crates to each other until they reached the bus, at which point the driver would stack them on seats and on the floor. As they moved the crates, the unicorn that Joker had shot earlier tried to stand, not dead quite yet, but not in very good shape.
As the last of the crates were transported into the bus, it spoke. “You think you’re smart, huh? Don't you know who you’re stealing from? You and your friends are dead! You hear me! Dea-urk!”
He choked as the Joker grabbed him by the neck, suffocating him slowly as he examined the miniature horse held aloft in his grasp.
The other guys, now with the crates stowed and nothing else to do but watch, looked between each other nervously as their comrade tormented the pony.
He grabbed the pony’s muzzle and forced it open before reaching into his jacket. Taking a smoke grenade from it, he stuffed it into the pony’s mouth; leaving the pin clipped to him via a long, thin string.
“I think, whatever doesn’t kill you simply makes you… stranger…” He then released the pony, letting it fall down to the floor where it stared, cross-eyed, at the cylinder jammed between his teeth.
Joker then turned and walked to the bus, the other clowns quickly hopping inside before Joker pulled himself inside, closing the door behind him and leaving the smoke grenade’s string caught within it.
Unclipping the string from his jacket, he took a seat across from 5, who quickly looked out the window as the driver sped out onto the street. Joker grinned behind his mask as he heard the snap of the string being pulled taut behind them, imagining what would be happening to the pony as the grenade released its airborne payload.
As they joined a caravan of identical school buses, Joker set his feet up on top of one of the potion crates, relaxing as he took in the sound of police sirens as cop cars sped past them and towards the bureau.
He turned to see 2 opening one of the crates, checking out the vials within that contained the swirling, purple liquid. He reached inside for one of his own, and, examining it for a moment, he placed it back in the crate, staring at it with hatred in his eyes.
You’re the reason Batman is a pony. You're the reason I can no longer fulfill my duty to chaos by fighting the Batman. If only I didn’t need you for my plans, I would destroy every last bit of you that I could. If only, if only…
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After reading this story, it has been determined that its content is not in keeping with what The Conversion Bureau group is looking for. This story will be removed from the group.
Fyi I am imagining Mark Hamill voicing Joker and not Heath Ledger.
5395231
Lol works well with either voice
5395230
I assume the reason for this being that it hasn't gotten to the part containing more ponies? If so, i'd appreciate your waiting for the story to really take form, as this is only just a beginning from which it can go in any number of directions.
5395256
Truthfully, the primary reason for the removal of the story had nothing to do with the amount of pony in it. If it's enough for the site, then that suffices for the group, in addition to obvious need for the core elements of a TCB story. The primary reason that this story was removed from the group was that the focus of the story appears (and I will grant that the story is still young) to be the Joker carrying out a campaign of fear and terror against the ponies for converting Batman. That, coupled with the fact that most of the second chapter appears to retain a bulk of the content from the Joker's initial scenes in The Dark Knight film, was enough for me to make the decision I did. Should the story's premise become more benign in later chapters, then I would be happy to re-evaluate my decision. But for the time being, a story like this is not something that we are interested in having as part of our group.
5395293
I suppose that isn't unreasonable. I made the first chapter like the opening of the movie simply because I thought it would be a nice way for it to start. I hope the next few chapters will show that it will NOT be just the movie with ponies, but in fact it's own being, following far different events that spiral in one of several decisions, depending on how i decide to write it.
I hate Conversion Bureau Stories with every fiber of my being... But I like this one. Liked and faved. Keep it up.
The idea is interesting, but one thing I noticed about this joker is that unlike the Joker in The Dark Knight, he didn't really kill any one of his guys after the heist. I'm also surprised that this potion seems to just change humans forcibly, but leaves the mind intact rather than convert it into a mindless happy drone that it normally does in other CB stories.
Like the idea, but wondering whether or not Joker is going to make that potion into something similar to his laughing gas. Also, it would be really helpful to gain insight from Batman himself about his current situation, and whether or not he'll have to choose between the two evils of either forced conversion ponies or a mad criminal mastermind.
Update soon and good luck!
This is going to be good.
Also, if you could please put in Harley Quinn.
Bring in all of Batman's Rouge's Gallery in minus Ghul since he would actually sympathize with Celestia.
5395446
I didn't have any of the henchmen killed because I think that, due to his hatred of anything pony because of what the PER has done, he would consider having humans kill each other or killing them himself to be against his immediate goals and would make him synonymous with the supposedly evil nature of humanity that the PER preaches about, something he would not want.
5395446
You should like the next chapter, as it will mainly focus on what is going on with Batman as well as other figures who will become important soon.
You should bring other villans to help Joker. It would be interesting to see Bane meet Celestia and the Elements.
Hmm so are you going to bring any other DC villians/heros/or possible mercs in this or is it just Batman villains we're waiting for? Just curious.
You have my interest well done!
Haven't read a good TCB in two years.
So this is not about Jeff Moreau bombing Celestia with the Normandy SR-2...
I NEED MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
holy shit this is good keep it up
Normally, I hate standard TCB stories with a passion (Chatoyance being one of the reasons), but this one looks interesting. I'll be looking forward to more.
Hmmm. The bus, smoke grenade in the mouth, shotgun by guy coming out if his office... you know what I'll just stop there, but good job changing a bit of that part so far. I saw what you did there.
Ehh, and there goes my good mood, this is was too cut and paste of the intro to dark knight so far. I'll be watching but no faves yet.
Wait a sec...
Is... he gonna turn himself into a pony, got to Equestria, and wreck all of Celestia's shit?
A crossover of Batman without Batman?
img.pandawhale.com/107174-joker-I-like-that-gif-Imgur-He-74ro.gif
Dear Zach.
Oh...oh...ooooooooh. Oh dahling, I haven't been pulled in by a primes like this in years! Now considering that it's about 1 am in my neck of the woods, I won't be reading this fic right now. But expect to hear from me soon.
Sincerely Yours, The Cake Devil.
I like the idea. Although Batman should have been made a bat-pony, heh.
Movie? Aw, and here I was thinking we had BTAS Joker. Shame.
Movie? Aw, and here I was thinking we had BTAS Joker. Shame.
Chapter 1 got my hopes up quite a bit. Seeing how directly you ripped off the beginning of the movie in this chapter made them crash back down again.
(A story is supposed to build a world in the reader's head. Ripping off the movie this directly in response to completely different events is so unbelievably implausible that it caused that illusion to shatter, revealing wooden puppets on strings.)
Thumbs down.
P.S. I agree with another comment I read that this would have felt more satisfying if it were crossing with Batman: The Animated Series rather than the Dark Knight movies ...or anything with a more "comic book supervillain" rendition of the joker, really, such as Tim Burton's 1989 version. (As long as it's not the '60s series with Adam West. That's not serious enough.)
The Dark Knight version of the Joker is a little too "psychopath, not supervillain" in tone to truly live up to the potential of a TCB cross. (If you do the TCB in any way familiar to form, the Dark Knight content doesn't have room to shine. If you do TDK properly, the TCB content falls short unless you're really good and reinterpret its tone and detail significantly beyond what you've done in the intro.)