My Little Pony: A Giant in Equestria

by Abyssal Angel

Chapter 4

I held up a hand above my head, squinting as I tried to block the light of the sun. According it it's position, it's almost midday, and a couple hours since the other ponies left me. To my chagrin, my skin has already turned pink due to sunburn, and I cursed inside my head for not having thought of that earlier.

Standing up, causing the two nearby guards to become more alert than before, I considered what to do. I need some kind of shade and fast, plus some water if I don't want to get heatstroke or something, and I've no idea when Twilight or the others will be coming. As it is, if they've been asleep as long as Rainbow Dash here has, that probably means they were up all night, last night. So I can't expect any help from that quarter, the guards won't speak despite my whispered cajolings to at least try and help me pass the time with some conversation, and I haven't seen another pony even once. Considering the way they reacted last time, it's probably best if I don't go seeking them out without my companions.

That just leaves Rainbow Dash, but darn it, I don't want to wake her up! It'd be like purposely waking up an adorable sleepy kitten. It's not only mean, but this 'kitten' might buck me in the face if I break her beauty sleep.

Resolving myself to do everything one handed for now, I look around for a source of water. It doesn't take long to spot it. There's a river that passes along between Ponyville and the... what did Celestia call it? The Everfree Forest, yeah that was it. I started walking over to it, keeping my pace slower than usual, trying to be mindful of the guards, who would probably have to gallop to keep up with me otherwise.

Reaching the river, or more of a small stream from my perspective, I kneeled down at its banks, and scooped up some water one handed. Not only was it not very effective, but my palm came back with tiny fish wriggling on my hand. Sighing, I dipped my hand back in the stream to get the fish off and contemplated what to do. Obviously the river's out unless I want to drink tiny raw fish along with my water. I nearly vomited in my mouth just thinking about it.

I contemplated what to do next. Maybe follow the river? I might find a lake or something...

My thoughts were interrupted by a tiny adorable yawn. I looked at Rainbow, who's head lifted slowly as she blearily looked around.

"Wha?..." she mumbled, then looked up at my face. Her eyes widened for a moment before they settled into recognition, and she squeaked, flying up out of my hand, her face red as a tomato. I chuckled, and said quietly, "Don't worry, no one else saw. And thanks for letting me pet you. It was getting hard to hold myself back and the lot of you are almost ridiculously adorable to me."

"Yeah, well... it was just a onetime thing, so we're square." she said in a huff, putting on a veneer of bravado that at that moment was so fake I nearly sweatdropped.
Disappointed, I looked away slightly and said, "Oh... that's too bad, cause I really liked petting you and was hoping I could do it more often... I mean, it's not hard to see you like to project yourself as a tough awesome pony to others, so I understand, but... even tough awesome ponies deserve a little pampering too, even if it's in secret..."

Rainbow visibly faltered, "Well I, uh... maybe... but only in secret!"

I turned back to her with a wide smile, "I promise."

"Pinkie Promise!" Rainbow declared.

I raised an eyebrow. "Um, ok?" I responded, and held up my pinkie, bemused.

She stared at my hand and asked, "Uh, what are you doing?"

"A Pinkie Promise? Where I come from, when two people pinkie promise, they wrap their pinkie finger," I wriggled said finger a little to indicate it, "around the other's pinkie finger and the shake on it. It's supposed to be a binding promise, and all that. I'm guessing a 'pinkie promise' means something else, considering ponies don't really have fingers?"

Rainbow looked at the, to her, giant finger hovering in front of her and said, "Um, yeah. A Pinkie Promise here is kind of a custom for those who've known Pinkie Pie long enough. 'Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!' See? That's a Pinkie Promise. And no one ever breaks a Pinkie Promise."

"FOREVER!!!" I jumped and turned to see Pinkie Pie's head having popped out from behind a nearby rock. She dipped behind the rock again. Curious, I leaned over to look behind said rock, only to be greeted by a lack of pink pony. "The heck?" I said.

"Yeah, you learn not to question it after a while. Pinkie Pie is Pinkie Pie." Rainbow Dash said, shrugging.

"Ok, well, can you do the motions again? I kind of forgot them when I was startled like that." Matthew said, sheepishly.

Rainbow did the motions of the Pinkie Promise again, "Cross my heart," she crossed her heart, "Hope to fly," she stuck her hoof in the air, "Stick a cupcake in my eye." Here she pressed her hoof against her eye, which she closed at the last moment.

I nodded, bemused, "Ok, seems easy enough. I promise that any times where I get to pet you, now and into the future, will remain a secret between us. Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye." I did the motions, though I palmed my face rather than miming a punch. Wouldn't make sense for a human to hold a cupcake on their fist anyway. Speaking of, I was curious and wanted to ask how a pony holds a cupcake in the first place, but reminded myself there were more important things to worry about right now.

"By the way... is there a place where I can get a drink of water?" I asked Rainbow.

"Uh... why not the river?" she asked in return, gesturing to the river right in front of me, confused.

"I just tried to scoop some water one handed while you were asleep. Not only did I not get much water, but I also scooped a bunch of fish, and drinking raw fish sounds- urp!" I slapped a hand over my mouth.

Rainbow Dash's face had turned a little green at that, "Yeah, ok, that'd be really gross. Alright then, let's see... water... can you drink from a cloud?"
"Say what?" I asked, utterly confused.

Rainbow chuckled, "Here." she flew up into the sky and grabbed a cloud. My brain screeched to a halt, even as she moved the cloud in front of my face.
Rainbow patted the cloud lightly, "This has water in it, so if you drink it, that should work, right?"

I tentatively poked the cloud. My finger went straight through as expected. Just a pile of water vapor.

"How the hell did you move this?..." I asked, still in shock.

"Pegasus magic! It's pretty awesome right? Pegasi are practically MADE for controlling the weather." She landed on the cloud, displaying the fact she could stand on mere water vapor, then flew up into a hover again. "Making it rain, keeping the sky clear, you name it, we can do it. That's my job here in Ponyville as head Weather Manager. Though, that's not the job I really want."

I nodded, "What job do you want, then?"

"I want to join The Wonderbolts! To fly with my heroes and perform awesome stunts! That's my TRUE calling!" she said excitedly, pulling a few loop-de-loops.
I smiled at her enthusiasm, "That sounds pretty awesome!"

"Yeah," she said, then seemed to droop slightly, "But they don't accept just anypony in the Wonderbolts. I gotta train and get better, and practice my signature moves so I can really show my stuff, then I'm sure to get in!"

I nodded, "With that attitude, I'm sure you're going to get in. I can't wait to see some of your shows!"

Rainbow blushed, even as she visibly preened at the praise. "Yeah, it'll be pretty awesome. You want to see some of my moves?"

I nodded. She grinned, and said, "Alright, but first." she pointed at the cloud, raising an eyebrow at me.

"Oh yeah..." I'd completely forgotten about the cloud while we were talking. I tried to push it in my mouth, but only got a wet palm for my trouble. I eyed the thing critically. How the heck am I supposed to drink this? Then I had an idea. I opened my mouth wide and leaned forward, the entire thing going into my mouth. The entire thing dissipated, leaving me with... a moist feeling in my mouth. Not even enough water to really swallow.

I frowned, and Rainbow Dash frowned as well, "Not enough?"

I shook my head, "That barely got my mouth wet."

Rainbow nodded, looking around, "Alright then, maybe... I'll be right back!"

She zipped away, a barely visible rainbow contrail trailing after her. It wasn't even a minute before she came back, pushing a dark grey storm cloud that was significantly larger.

"Alright, I just whipped this up. And don't worry, I didn't add any charge to it, so you won't get zapped or anything." Rainbow said, proudly.

I eyed the cloud and reached out to poke it, only for Rainbow to block my finger, "Hey, careful! I packed a lot of water in there and the lightest nudge will send it all to the ground."

I nodded, chagrined, "Alright."

This cloud was larger than the last one. I had to open my mouth really wide but I just barely got it all in before the entire thing dissipated and my cheeks bulged with water. I swallowed it down slowly, quite satisfied at the end.

"Thanks! That should do for now. A person like me is supposed to get about 8 glasses of water a day, and that was about a little over half a glass I think." I said.

Rainbow's eyes bulged, "Only half!? And you need, like, 8 of those? Not good, 16 of those clouds a day would put Ponyville in a drought in no time!"

I winced, "Oh... well... is there a way to maybe get more water from somewhere else? I mean... push comes to shove, I'm sure I could drink from the river if I have to..."

Rainbow looked decidedly green again, "Yeah, no, don't worry about it. I'm sure I can requisition some more clouds from Cloudsdale or something. If not, I'm sure that Twilight can figure something out. She's got backing from the Princess to look after you, and I'm not going to have you dying from thirst. Not on my watch!"

I smiled shyly, touched at the feeling she'd put when she declared that. "Thanks..." I said quietly.

"Don't mention it. So what other stuff should we look out for? Like, what do you eat?" Rainbow asked.

Cue my stomach growling at the mention of food.

"Woah, was that your stomach!? When's the last time you ate?" Rainbow asked.

"Um, not since I got here, which was just this morning. Before that..." I thought back, "I'm pretty sure I had dinner last night..."

"But you've ended up skipping breakfast. You should've woken me or something. At the very least I could've gotten Pinkie Pie. No way would she let you go hungry." Rainbow said, sounding upset.

"I didn't want to wake you... you all looked really tired, and... I'm kinda used to looking after myself..." I said, trailing off.

"So, you've been lost in another land with nothing to your name besides the clothes on your back before?" Rainbow asked.

"Um, well... no..." I answered sheepishly.

"Then you need help. I totally understand wanting to take care of yourself. I get that. But when you're stuck in a bad situation, there's nothing wrong with asking for a little help every now and then. That's what friends are for! And I'm always there for my friends. So if you need something, speak up, and I'll see about getting it, alright?" Rainbow finished.

I nodded, feeling slightly overwhelmed. After a moment, I responded, "Ok... well, speaking of things I need..."

"Yeah?" Rainbow asked.

I looked down at my arms, then held them up, wincing. Rainbow noticed my wince and looked at my arms, concerned, "What is it? Are you hurt?...actually, were you always that color? I could've sworn you weren't so pink when you first got here... You're kind of pink all over..."

I shook my head, "I don't have any fur like you do. Humans who spend too much time in the sun, when they have my complexion, tend to get sunburned really easily... and I've already been out here for a couple hours without any shade... I can handle half an hour easily enough without sunscreen, but longer than that? The more sunburned I get, the more dangerous it is."

Rainbow's eyes widened in alarm, "How dangerous?"

I shrugged helplessly, "If I'm out here long enough, especially if I'm not getting enough water, I could die."

Rainbow whinnied, actually whinnied, in alarm. In deference to the situation, I tried really hard not to snort in laughter from hearing it.

"Ok, this counts as an emergency. I'm on it!" she saluted to me, and I couldn't help but salute back on automatic, mentally wincing at the reflex from my time in the Air Force. She raised an eyebrow for a moment at the gesture, but then flew off even faster than before without saying anything.

While I waited there for her to return, I looked down at the guards, who's composure's had broken slightly to eye me in concern. "Don't worry, I can stand to be out here for at least a couple more hours I think. It's gonna be painful recovering from even this much sunburn though..." I said, poking my arm and wincing, a stark white finger mark left on my arm before it faded back to the ever darkening pink.

The two guards turned to each other, and seemed to confer so quietly I couldn't even hear them speak, even if I saw their mouths move. One of them then nodded, then started galloping for the town.

"Where's he going?" I wondered.

"To inform Princess Celestia's protégé Twilight Sparkle of the situation. " the guard's surprisingly deep voice answered.

"So you CAN talk!" I said, surprised. The guard merely stared stoically back.

"Oh come on! I heard you talk. What, can you only speak when there's something important to say?" I asked.

"Yes." came the short and succinct answer.

My eyes widened, "Oh. Well, I guess that means you're not going to say much while on duty then. When do you get off duty?"

"I am always on duty for the Princess. Our job is to guard her royal highness and her lands from outside threats at all times. There is never a time when that duty ends. That is the life of the Canterlot Royal Guard." the guard said.

"Woah... hardcore... I was in the military myself back home, but we were never 'on duty' all the time. We were definitely on call if something happened, but we had our off hours to unwind so we wouldn't burn ourselves out." I said, slightly awed.

"We have the same up to a point. The Royal Guard, and the Night Guard. But we royal guard do as our Princess commands, and if we are to guard you day and night, that's what we will do." he answered stoically.

I nodded, "Fair enough." we lapsed into silence after that.

It wasn't long after that two ponies ran up from the direction of the town. It was the guard again and Twilight Sparkle.

"I just heard the news! You get sunburned? Why didn't you say anything?" Twilight asked, panting slightly.

I shrugged, "It wasn't really a big deal at the time. I spend most of my time indoors, so getting a sunburn hasn't come up for me in a really long time. It wasn't until a bit after you all left that I realized I was in trouble, what with the sun beating down on me and all."

Twilight bit her lip and was about to reply, when a shadow passed overhead. A very LARGE shadow.

Looking up, my jaw dropped at the sight of Rainbow Dash helping and directing a veritable flock of Pegasi in pushing an almost ridiculously large cloud into place to cover my head.

Once the cloud was in place, a number of the Pegasi disengaged and flew back towards Ponyville, while I could just barely hear Rainbow Dash shouting, "Alright, good work team! Raindrops! Stormchaser! I want you two to take the first shift. Do not let this cloud move from covering that human! His very life is at stake!"

Rainbow then flew down and immediately spotted Twilight, "Oh good, you're here Twilight. So what do you two think, huh? Will that be enough?"

I opened my mouth to answer, but Twilight beat me to it, "Actually Rainbow, this could actually be more dangerous for him."

"WHAT!?" Rainbow asked, crying out in disbelief. She turned to me, and I nodded sadly. "It's true. A lot of people back home tend to think cloud cover will protect them from the light so they can go out without needing sunscreen, and they get confused when they come back home, sometimes with a worse sunburn than if they'd been out under the sun with no cloud cover at all."

"But, but that doesn't even make SENSE! You're in a shadow! Doesn't that count for anything!?" Rainbow asked desperately.

I nodded, "It does a little, but the thing is, see how that cloud up there is white? It means the cloud isn't actually blocking the light from the sun, it's just scattering it. So instead of getting straight on sunlight from a small circle shape, I'm getting scattered beams of it from a much larger cloud shape. It's even worse if the sky is absolutely full of clouds. It's better if it's a rain cloud though, since... well, you know how the more full of rain a cloud gets, the darker it is? That means it's actually blocking more and more light."

Rainbow listened, then looked at the cloud, "Well that wouldn't work. Turning a cloud that size into a rain cloud would just cause the whole thing to start pouring rain."

"Don't worry Rainbow, we'll figure something out." Twilight told her, then turned to me. "So aside from shade, is there anything else you absolutely need immediately?"

"Food, water, shelter." I promptly answered. "I haven't eaten since dinner last night, I've had one rain cloud, courtesy of Rainbow Dash, which roughly equaled about half a glass of water, and a human needs 8 glasses of water on average a day to stay healthy, though I can survive on less if necessary. And I need food three times a day to stay healthy."

Twilight nodded, "That sounds about right for a pony as well, though a glass and a plate of food for you is going to be a lot larger than what we eat..."

"We should get Pinkie, Twilight. Between her and Applejack, they can whip up a lot of food quickly." Rainbow said.

Twilight seemed to turn a bit green at that, and laughed one of those fake laughs, "Eheh, that they can. Maybe... Rainbow, could you go fly over to Sweet Apple Acre's and ask Applejack if they have any leftovers for our friend here from their reunion?"

"Can do!" And Rainbow was off like a shot.

"Now," Twilight said and I turned back to her, to see her holding a scroll and a quill that she got from... somewhere. "I need to make a list. What can and can't you eat?"

I scratched my head, "Ok, well, I'm what is called an omnivore. Humans need a balanced diet over the course of the day, that can be best depicted by an image that humans call the food pyramid."

I then stuck my finger in the ground and made a large triangle, then drew lines in it to draw the pyramid. "Here on the bottom, represents pasta and grains. That represents a large portion of what humans eat. Above that are two roughly equal sections, fruits and vegetables. Above that in smaller portions would be dairy and meat, and above that, would be dessert I guess. Cake, sugar, cookies, fats and oils. Stuff like that."

"I... see..." Twilight said, still writing. "Can we go back to those last two? What do you mean exactly by meat and dairy?"

"Well, humans require protein and other such things that can be most easily obtained by eating meat and dairy products." I answered.

"What constitutes 'Dairy products?'" Twilight asked.

"Um, milk, cheese, yogurt, butter, stuff like that." I answered.

"I know of milk, and I've heard some other omnivore species eat cheese, but what are yogurt and butter?" she asked.

"Ah, well, butter is... well, it's a yellow spread that I know is made by using a churn, and doing something with milk and stuff... but I've honestly no idea how it's actually made beyond that... as for yogurt, that... actually has less to do with milk I think, and more to do with... some kind of culture of bacteria... I know how to make more yogurt if I have yogurt in the first place, but no clue how to make it from scratch."

"Ah well, it sounds a little... strange, anyway. Maybe we'll find something similar to it that we have here in Equestria. What about meat? What kind of meat do you eat?" Twilight asked, slightly nervously.

"Well, humans can't eat meat raw. It has to be cooked. As for what type of meats we eat... technically we can eat most any kind of meat, though the meat that's most widely available back home and thus the meat we eat the most would be chicken, fish, pork, and beef. Er, that is, the last two are pigs and cows." I answered.

Twilight's eyes widened as her quill accidently snapped, "You eat COWS!?"

"Er, yeah... but if that's a problem here, I don't have to... in fact some humans are able to eat a completely vegetarian diet, able to get the protein they need from certain types of beans and such. I've eaten vegetable patties, that are made completely from vegetables and such that tasted very similar to meat that I found quite good, though... the problem with both is that I've no idea how to make it or what type of beans have protein in them, especially here."

"Ok, yes, but... why do you eat COWS?" Twilight asked.

"Is there something particularly wrong with eating cows over the other meats I mentioned?" I asked.

"Well, yes, for one, cows are sapient!" Twilight said loudly.

My eyes widened, "strike cow from the menu while I'm in Equestria then. Thing is, where I'm from, humans are the only sapient creatures on the planet. Lots of animals, but the majority of them aren't even close to being intelligent, rather they're mainly governed by their instincts. Attempts have been made to see if certain animals with smarter brains can be taught, and for the most part they can be, recognizing colors and shapes, but it's mostly pattern recognition and learning behaviors to please their owners in return for food."

Twilight's eyes were wide as she listened. "Wow... I can barely imagine something like that... there are many different sapient races here in Equestria. Ponies, Griffons, Zebras, Minotaurs, and Dragons just to name a few. And the majority of animals are smart enough to hold conversations with if you can learn how they speak. My friend Fluttershy's special talent is that she can speak with just about any animal and she learns and helps them. Very few animals fit the description you gave of what animals are like on your world, though fish is one of them. Do you think you could survive off of fish alone?"

I scratched my head. "Maybe? I've never really tried, and even people from island nations on my world tend to have more than just fish and other stuff from the sea to eat, having pigs as well at the very least."

Twilight nodded, "I'll... send a letter to Princess Celestia to see about maybe getting in contact with the Dragons. They tend to eat meat and gems exclusively, and we could probably import some from them for you every now and then. Other than that, it sounds like your diet mostly meshes with what ponies eat. Do you like hay?"
I made a slight face at the question and said, "While I can't say I've ever tried hay, I've never heard of a human eating it either. Horses and other animals certainly, but humans? No."

"Oh. When you said grains, I figured hay might be doable... what kind of grains do you eat if not hay?"

"Bread and cereal mostly. Wheat is a huge staple of the farming industry on earth, even though I don't think we can actually eat wheat directly..."

"Interesting... so you should be able to eat baked goods from Sugar Cube Corner easily enough... is there anything else about your dietary requirements I should know?" Twilight asked.

"Mmmm... not that I can think of... I don't eat gems, that's for sure." I said, shrugging.

Twilight nodded, "What about bugs? That's a big food staple for griffons and birds."

I made a face, "While I've heard that some humans can cook and eat bugs, for the most part the idea of it sounds really gross."

Twilight nodded and wrote something down on her scroll, then rolled it up and put both items... somewhere.

"How did you do that?" I asked.

"Do what?" Twilight asked.

"The scroll and quill you were just writing with. Where'd you put them?" I asked.

"Oh! It's just my storage space. You don't have one of those? Most ponies have them, though how magical they are tends to limit how much can be stored in them. I keep lots of scrolls and quills in mine, plus a few various other things I've needed. If I end up needing to carry anything more than that, I just use my saddlebags."
I shook my head, "I don't have anything like that. Humans don't have magic."

Twilight nearly tripped in place, "What- but- how!? That shouldn't be possible! Everything has magic! If we didn't have at least a little we wouldn't be alive! Even the ground and the trees and everything about us has trace amounts of magic! In fact..."

Twilight's horn started glowing, and a wide cone of energy shot out and went up and down my form once or twice. Then the beam cut out and Twilight grinned, "So do you."

I blinked, "Um, what?"

"You have magic. I just checked. It's far less than an Earth pony's or even some animals, but you do have some. Actually it's pretty fascinating that your magic quotient is so low. Usually it correlates with the level of intelligence of the subject, but you seem to have completely broken the mold! Oooh how fascinating! I can't wait to do some tests and see what else we can learn from you!"

I grinned slightly and said, "So long as you're not going to turn mad scientist on me, that should be fine."

Twilight quirked her head, "Mad scientist? I've gotten kind of mad before, but nothing too extreme I don't think. Is there something about angry scientists that trouble you?"

"Ah, no... when I say mad, I don't mean angry. Mad in this instance tends to mean 'crazy'. Back on my world, a mad scientist doesn't usually start out that way. Usually. It tends to start out small. They want to know something, but testing it requires breaking the edges of morality. It's all down hill from there. A mad scientist has lost all touch with morality and gives it up purely for the pursuit of knowledge for knowledge's sake. The worst of them have been characterized as hacking people into pieces then sewing the different pieces together, mixing in certain chemicals, and then super charging them with energy to see if they can bring the dead back to life, or other bad things."

Twlight's face was composed in a rictus of horror. "That sounds awful!" she cried.

I nodded, "It is. Most aren't that bad, but the danger of falling into unethical scientific practices is an ever present danger for some scientists, and there are some that slip down that slope and experiment with things that are best left alone."

Twilight shook her head, disturbed, "Your world sounds kind of scary."

I shrugged, "Parts of it can be. Human beings are a bit unique in the fact that our actions can range from purely good to downright evil. The majority of us sit in the middle of those two ranges and try to do the former as much as we can, even if we do get a few who end up gladly and happily doing the latter. When that happens, us people who try to do good have to do necessary evils to protect ourselves."

"Necessary evils?" Twilight asked, a slight frown on her face.

I nodded, "I can already tell Equestria knows some of them. In a perfect world, guards wouldn't exist. I would appear and you wouldn't have to fear the possibility I might be dangerous. I would have met a naive race of ponies that would have taken one look at me and welcomed me with open arms. In a way, I'm actually kind of glad the majority of you ran away screaming in horror. If you'd all been completely naive, just being my normal self would have scarred the lot of you horribly. Can you imagine explaining the concept of death to a herd of innocent bunnies that can understand you? That'd be about the same equivalent."

Twilight made a face even as she nodded, "I think I understand what you mean."

I think she was going to say something further, but at that point we both noticed a cloud from a group of ponies running up, lead from the front by Applejack, with Rainbow Dash flying just over head.

Author's Note:

Man, copy pasting from my Microsoft Word documents then having to go through this whole thing spacing out everything correctly afterwards is annoying!

Comments

[Gyro Pony]

???
Why so few comments?
I was thinking about this story recently - glad to see it updated!!

Also, yes.... correcting spacing for EVERY LINE will leave you cursing.

[Dj7291993]

ask Applejack if they have an leftovers

I think that should be "any".