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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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4148647 Very true! Very true indeed!
awesome
4148801 Thanks.
not the best grammer, but that has never stopped me before! This is an exciting tale, and I shall continue reading!
... Ummmm, ok?
No offense but it seems kind of rushed and things seem to happen out of nowhere, Daring Do suddenly appearing, the way you made the Elements appear, the Skeletons and Zombies, and the weapons the Elements were using. While admittedly it's, for the most part, original and I'm in no way a critic, especially since I can't write(Dialogue at least), it just seems rushed and makes no sense at multiple parts. I did like the way you introduced the Kirin in the first chapter, and the way the Kirin and Twilight met(Though you may want to change how long after NMM it happened.)
I was gonna write thus whole thing about how bad the grammar is and how badly overpowered spirit is, and generally complain, but then I realized that its time to stop. Also that I should just shut my mouth because I am actually enjoying it, and I am enjoying how overpowered he is, so I gave up on the original paragraph and did this instead.
Anypony else says taste the rainbow mother fucker everytime nightmare moon is defeated in a fanfic?