Ernest Saves Equestria

by Emerald Harp

Stars Above and Pits Below

Spike watched in awe as Zecora dipped her hooves into the pool of liquid glass. Twilight for her part was pouring magic into the mirror, keeping it in its fluid state. The dragon had seen the alicorn perform feats of magic above and beyond his wildest dreams. However, this was another level. Building a portal to another dimension, albeit a temporary one, was something he had never expected to witness.

The zebra grunted. “For me to breach into the beyond I’ll need more magic to weaken the bonds.”

Twilight only nodded and redoubled her efforts. The mirror now fully encased in the Princess’s aura began to float off the ground.

Spike did not know how Zecora was doing this, but he was now very sure he did not want to get on the zebra’s bad side. It did not seem like she had done much. She had painted her face in violet swirls and sprinkled some purple dust in the shape of a pentagram on the looking glass’s surface. Last, but not least, she had placed a grease-stained rag that had come from Ernest’s old truck in the center of the pentagram. She then began chanting. The brew mistress had nodded to Twilight, giving her the signal to give life to the spell. The glass in the mirror had turned to indigo-colored mercury, and through it Spike could see into one of the rooms of Canterlot High. The view was blurry, like looking into a lake of purple haze, but he could make out enough to see that they were looking into some kind of music room. Moments later a tall, lanky figure appeared, pushing a mop around the floor. “Ernest!” Spike had shouted. “It’s him.”

Zecora’s grunts turned to shouts as she struggled against an unseen barrier just beneath the pool’s surface. Spike watched Ernest stop mopping and focus his attention on the mirror. It looked like the human was saying something, but Spike could hear nothing over Twilight’s magic and the Zebra’s chanting and grunting.

“Zecora, I think you’re doing it. He’s seeing something on his side of the mirror,” yelled Spike.

Thus encouraged, the brew mistress hollered to the princess. “More power, my friend. We are approaching the end!”

Twilight closed her eyes and dug deep. Sweat washed the pony’s face and began to collect underneath her hooves. The mirror’s wooden frame buckled and broke underneath the intense pressure.

The zebra’s chanting shouts increased in volume to full-on screams as her hooves pressed down. Spike bit his talons as the tension continued to build until finally Zecora’s hooves passed through the mirror and into Ernest’s realm. The dragon could here singing the second Zecora had pierced the barrier.

“ ’Tis I’ll be here in sunshine or in shadow!
Oh Danny boy, Oh Danny boy, I love you so!”

Spike watch Zecora lunge forward almost dipping her face into the purple maelstrom of barely contained energy. She grabbed the human and heaved with all her might. The baby dragon did not wait for an invitation when he leapt to help. He reached his claws through the purple pool and grabbed onto something that felt like a foot. Spike heaved with Zecora. As he did so, he felt the appendage he was pulling on change from something cold and metallic to something round and rubbery. The two pulled until a great big chunk of anthromorphic metal exited the warped mirror. As soon as this happened Twilight cut off the flow of magic to the mirror and collapsed to the floor in exhaustion. The purplish mass of liquid glass coalesced into a disfigured chunk of black sand and shattered when it hit the wooden floor of the library.

Spike winced at the noise, but his attention was solely on what he and Zecora had just fished from the dimensional pond. “What is that? It can’t be Ernest, can it?” The dragon looked at the metal thing’s glowing, blue, square head. It had a message that said, “An error occurred while displaying the previous 27,532 errors. Rebooting in 10, 9, 8 . . .”

Zecora frowned. “I hope so, my little dragon, for we do not have the resources to try this again.”

“7, 6, 5 . . .”

Regaining some of her strength, Twilight slowly walked up to where the others were and looked down at the machine. Words laced with exhaustion she commented, “Maybe he’s in a costume. Ernest can disguise himself pretty well when he wants to.”

Spike and Zecora nodded hopefully.

“4, 3, 2, 1”

With a happy jingle, the blue screen disappeared and was replaced by a smiling, yellow face decked out with a flat cap. The robot slowly sat up. “Faith! Either that was one heck of an update package, or I need some serious defragging. Now, where’s me mop?”

Spike frowned. That did not sound like the voice of the redneck. “Ernest? Is that you?”

The robot blinked and studied the three other occupants that were in the room with him. He stared at the Equestrians for a long time before the small bulldozer blade lodged in his chest flipped down to produce a keyboard. With fast, hydraulic hands, Willie typed frantically all the while muttering, “No, no, no. This can’t be right. I thought he was just telling me stories. I can’t be here.”

Twilight, Spike, and Zecora looked at each other in confusion as the thing typed and talked.

“I have spent little time with Ernest at best, but was he usually like this?” asked Zecora.

Both Spike and Twilight shook their heads.

With a loud clunk the robot’s keyboard retracted back into his chest cavity. “Okay, there’s nothing wrong with me. No virtual gremlins, hard drive is pure, posotronic brain accelerator and flux capacitor are green, I’m even current on me patches by Jaysus. So that means . . .” Slowly, the robot pushed himself up onto his wheeled feet. With one of his hands he rubbed the back of his monitor/head like he was unsure how to proceed. He looked at the alicorn and asked, “Lass, be ye Princess Twilight Sparkle, per chance?”

Twilight beamed, “Yes.”

The robot closed his eyes. “Stars above and pits below. The database and facial scans don’t lie. This place is real. I’m in Camelot.”

Spike brightened. “Ernest! It is you.”

Willie shook his head. “Nay, lad. Me name is Willie. Ernest P. Worrell is me creator and Da. Right now he’s watching Sunset Shimmer back at the academy perform a play that I’d be proud to watch in the Abbey Theatre.” Willie’s virtual eyes narrowed. “Speaking of which, why am I here instead of over there?”

Zecora motioned for Willie to follow her. She opened a door to a small adjoining room and gestured to what was inside it.

The robot took a look inside, and then did a double take. “By Saint Simon’s stubby shillelagh, that’s here too?” Inside the room was the pin-cushioned, catatonic troll. “I thought Da took care of all the foul fae folk. How many of these wee demons do ye have knockin about?”

“There’s one more somewhere in the Everfree Forest, and he could have five dolls,” Twilight muttered.

Willie closed his virtual eyes and processed these new revelations. “Do we know where the evil Yggdrasil is?”

“What?” asked the alicorn.

“The tree, where’s his bloody tree?”

Spike shook his head. “We don’t know yet. Nopony has spotted anything in the forest yet.”

Willie bit back a curse and looked back at the pinned troll. “I take it he didn’t want to talk?”

The Equestrians filled him in on the brief interrogation and how it ended so abruptly.

“Okay, so he’s not dead. He just stroked off after he said something about a Pony of Shadows. How very Shakespeareic of him.”

Before the Equestrians could reply, Willie held up a hand to silence them. “Okay, here’s the plan. You lot get my Da here. I don’t care how you do it. I don’t care what favors you have to call in. I don’t care how many mirrors you have to bugger up; just get him here.”

Twilight frowned. “The mirror to Canterlot High is closed. We need to send a message to Princess Cadence to see if she can somehow open the portal and bring Ernest back.”

Spike grimaced. “We got another problem. Even if they find Ernest, it’s going to take hours for him to get here.”

“Leave that to me, my friends. I have an acquaintance that will help us to our ends.”

“Who is it?” asked Twilight.

“There is no time to explain, Twilight, my friend. Preparations need to be made, and I will begin.” With that, Zecora left the company and ventured forth into a much more uncertain world.

The alicorn turned her attention back to the robot. She watched one of its fingers telescope out to form a fine, foot-long point. “Willie, what are you doing?”

Willie eyed the Troll’s skull like it was a watermelon about to be cut in half. “Something ye don’t want to see. If he won’t talk, then we’ll have to find out what he knows another way. And we don’t have all night.”

Twilight nodded in understanding and shoed Spike out of the room and told him what to say in the message to Cadence. Meanwhile, Willie had placed one of his hands on the troll’s head.

The alicorn watched in fascination as jumbled heaps of raw data streamed by on Willie’s monitor/head, completely obscuring Willie’s avatar. After several moments, Willie’s smiling, yellow flatcapped face reappeared on the monitor. “Bloody hell. Can’t go in through the skull; bone density is too thick, even for my widgets. Have to go in through the mouth.” The robot repositioned himself to the front of the troll and looked up into the gaping maw of the catatonic troll. He nodded. “Should work.”

“Can I help?”

Willie blinked and looked at the tired alicorn. The poor thing looked like she could barely stand and her face had a greenish complexion. The robot flexed his hands as if loosening them up for the task ahead. “Are ye sure you wouldn’t rather be somewhere else, lass? This won’t be pretty.”

“I’ll try and keep him from biting down on your arm while you are operating.”

“Much obliged, if you’re up to it. You look about as healthy as an Irish man’s liver.”

Twlight took a deep breath. “I’ll be fine. Just give me a minute.” The pony looked at the troll and asked, “This might seem like an odd question, but why do we still need Ernest? He’s just a human, right? Aren’t you better equipped to handle this problem with your instruments and knowledge about the trolls?”

“In a word, no, I’m not. There is a prophecy written about these little buggars back on Earth. ‘From the innocence of five, an evil army shall arise. When blossoms shower down like rain, my dark kingdom shall come again. There is one who can stop me, if he will dare, with the heart of a child and a mother’s care.’”

Twilight nodded. “That’s from Old Lady Hackmore’s book. Remind me to give that to Ernest when he comes back.”

Willie turned back to the troll and pointed. “Everything I know about trolls, Equestria, ponies, has come from Ernest P. Worrell. According to my Da, back in Missouri he encountered a troll so powerful nothing could stop it. Not milk, not bullets, nor the combined might of an entire town. Troll Fighter One doesn’t know how the troll grew so powerful; no one does. But it did, and it was a holy terror to behold. This troll had taken five innocent children and turned them into wooden bookends to create his army, just like this wee turd blossom was doing,” Willie said, thumping the pinned troll on the leg. “The people wanted this thing’s blood and weren’t too particular about how they got it. They thought their kids were gone and gone forever. At the end, it was my da against probably the most powerful creature on the planet. All Ernest had was a carton of milk in his hand and a ring of fire at his back. You see, I have my dad’s memories in my head. And I will never forget to my deactivation day the naked hatred in those people’s faces.”

The pony’s eyes widened. She had been told this story before by Ernest himself while he was in his hospital bed. He had explained things in his own unorthodox way, but he had not impressed on her just how epic the confrontation really was. “But Ernest won. He kissed the troll, and it exploded.”

“Aye, that’s what he did. For a few seconds he loved that troll like any mother would her son. The creature that wanted him dead became the most important thing in the world to him.” Willie sighed. “The point is, it’s easier to give love, even unconditional love, to your family, your friends, people you know that have your back through thick and thin. Unconditional love is a bloody rare commodity when it comes to dealing with strangers, the shady characters in the streets, or the average joe in a crowd. Unconditional love for an enemy that wants to kill you and messes with kids like that . . .” Willie paused and shook his head. “I’m willing to bet my wheels and rubber that you can’t fill a water closet with enough people who can give that kind of love to a monster.” The robot gave the alicorn a hard look. “Lassie, I’m a robot. I don’t even know if I can love, let alone give it unconditionally like my father does. All I do know is that Ernest P. Worrell can give that kind of love. And that is why we need him here.”

The Princess considered what the robot had said. “I never thought about that. But, you’re right. I don’t know that many ponies that could or would love a troll like Rotnart.” She let her gaze wonder to a nearby table. On it stood the six wooden dolls that were very near and dear to her heart.

Gently, Willie replied, “Don’t fret, Princess. We’ll turn them back. You have me word on that. Now if ye are ready, I could use your help.”

Without a word, Twilight’s magical aura encompassed the troll’s jaws. She didn’t feel any resistance from the comatose troll.

Moments later, Willie stepped up to Rotnart’s gaping maw. With a quick, fluid motion, the robot implanted his probing spike through the roof of the troll’s mouth.

The alicorn looked away while still maintaining her magical hold on the creature’s mouth. She felt the troll jolt but remain docile.

“Hmmm, interesting. It’s like watching a crappy Welsh play with half the acts missing and no one’s talking.”

Twilight opened her eyes in curiosity. She was about to ask what the robot was seeing, but to her surprise, she didn’t need to. Flashing by on Willie’s monitor were strange images that only lasted seconds at a time. The pony stepped back in surprise. She saw Discord gesturing to the Tree of Harmony. After that she saw another troll talking and walking to a crumbling building that she recognized as the Castle of the Two Sisters. Moments later, she saw what looked like Nightmare Moon enchant both trolls with some sort of powerful spell. “These are Rotnart’s memories, right?”

For a reply, Willie extracted his metallic probe which killed the feed to the troll’s memories. He repositioned his arm by a few degrees and stabbed into the troll’s brain once again. This elicited a wet gurgle from the troll. Twilight felt the troll’s jaws reflexively bite down. The alicorn held back the teeth and after a while, the troll stopped biting. Twilight looked at Willie’s screen and saw that Rotnart’s memories began to flow by on Willie’s monitor/head again. “Aye, I’m trying to hit the hippocampus . . . but I’m not bloody sure where that is. It’s not like there’s an anatomy book on these things that says ‘poke the evil troglodyte here to get to his head-movies.’”

Twilight’s eyes lit up. “Maybe not on these trolls, but there is one on cave trolls. They might be similar.”

The pony could hear the confused surprise through the robot’s speakers. “You have one of those?”

“Yes. This is a library, after all. I know exactly where it is.”

Without looking up, Willie said, “We don’t have time for . . . .” The next thing he knew, a book was under his proverbial nose. The pages depicted detailed pictures of a troll’s brain, skull, and scalp, along with little descriptions of each part.

The robot extracted the probe and took a closer look at the book. He smirked. “Heh, well done, lass. This helps.”

Twilight felt a smile twitching across her tired face. “Thanks.”

After a minute of speed reading, Willie put down the book and declared, “Right then. According to this book we should find what we’re looking for about here.” Slowly, the robot inserted his super-fine probe once more into Rotnart’s gray matter. The flat-capped, yellow, smiley face that represented Willie’s emotions frowned. “By Cromwell’s cursed cock. What is this?”

“What? What’s wrong?” Twilight heard the sound of thin metal hitting thick glass. “Tink, tink, tink, tink.”

On the fourth “tink,” Twilight saw a blinding flash of blackness. To the alicorn it was like staring into an eclipse. Half a heartbeat later she heard a loud crash. She blinked away the after images of the bright, dark light and saw that Willie had been thrown across the room and had landed in a heap, breaking several bookshelves. The robot’s monitor was cracked down the middle. The smiling, yellow screen avatar had two x’s over his eyes and several virtual teeth had been knocked out.

The princess galloped over to the robot’s side. “Willie, are you alright?”

The machine slowly rose to his wheeled feet. “Jaysus, Mar---, bzzzt, and Joseph,” muttered the robot. “Yeah, I’m ok--- aaaaaaaay.”

“You don’t sound ok.”

Willie slammed his hydraulic metal hands against the side of his computer screen, which seemed to help some. “I don’t know what’s in that tro-- ‘bzzzzt’ head, but it’s none too pure. Something put a block of nasty crap in there, and it’s ‘bzzzzzzzt’ keeeeeeeeeeping the troll down and out. It’s sending signals to keep the troll in a coma. And apparently it doesn’t liked to be tam-, tamm-, ta-, ‘bzzzt.’ Bloody Hell!” screamed Willie in frustration at his new speech impediment. “It doesn’t liked being #*#$ed with.”

Twilight put her hoof to her mouth in concentration. She thought of the blinding black light and the images she saw of the pony of shadows. Both times she saw the same blackness. She quickly put two and two together. The alicorn turned to Willie. “If we remove that blockage in Rotnart’s brain, will he return to normal?”

The robot shrugged. “If I was in his shoes, I’d probably feel a lot better. Can you ‘bzzzt’ do it?”

Twilight looked at Rotnart. “Maybe, if this is what I think it is. A disenchantment spell should do the trick. Since you already set off the trap, this should be fairly simple.”

“Happy to help,” Willie replied drily.

Twilight sent her magic questing through the troll’s mouth, following the pin-prick holes Willie had made minutes before. “A thousand years ago, Nightmare Moon enslaved ponies by using her magic to place these talismans in her victim’s heads. Her magic would coalesce and form into small, solid blocks. According to the books I’ve read, the effectiveness of these blocks of magic were not consistent. Some ponies could resist being controlled by Nightmare Moon better than others. Ironically, the less intelligent the pony was, the better they could resist.”

At that moment, Spike peaked into the room. “Is everypony okay in here? I heard some crashing and swearing a minute ago.”

Willie raised his hand. “Guilty of both. You got the ‘bzzzzt’ message done?”

“Yeah, I just sent it. What happened to you?”

“The Troll’s egg salad was booby trapped. Long story. I’ll tell ya when you’re older.”

Before Spike could ask any further questions, Twilight sent a pulse of energy through her horn down the tendrils of magic that ended in the Troll’s brain. The alicorn could feel the dark block of magic dissolve and disappear completely.

The troll’s eyes popped opened. The next thing Twilight and her friends knew, Rotnart was filling the library with his screaming. “Rabuf! Rabuf! Don’t read the book!” The Troll was sweating profusely and his breath came in strangled heaves like he had just seen a ghost. Rotnart then locked eyes with the alicorn. “Rabuf, my brother, he’s going to the tree! He’s going to the Tree of Harmony. Once he reads the book to transform the tree, the Pony of Shadows will be freed. We got to stop her! She’ll kill us all! Ponies, trolls, . . . whatever the hell that thing is.” Rotnart said nodding at Willie. “I touched her mind when she tried to ruin mine! I know what she’s going to do, and it’s #$*^ing terrible!”

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Rabuf followed the flight of winged opossums through the night sky with his eyes. It looked like they were looking for something. “Good luck you brave marsupials. I hope you find what you’re looking for,” he said hopefully. The troll turned his attention back to the task at hand. He was close. From where he stood, he could see the staircase that led to the shiny plant thing. He felt a wave a joy wash over him. He was about to make some more friends. There was only one thing that was bothering him. He thought back to the last time he had spoken with Rotnart.

Earlier:

The king turned to his brother and helped him to his feet. “Rabuf. Brother. I am going to ask you to do a very hard thing. Maybe the hardest thing you’re ever going to do in your life. But the future of our race is now in your hands. I need you to concentrate and pay close attention to what I’m about to tell you.”

Rabuf nodded enthusiastically, already forgetting that his brother had tried to choke him to death moments ago. “Sure, boss. What do ya need?”

“I need you to take all the kid dolls you can get your disgusting hands on to the shiny place in the middle of the forest. When you get there, turn to page forty-two in my book. I need you to touch the book to the tree, and then put the five dolls in the hole.”

The younger trolled frowned. “But you told me never to read that book. You said you’d use my intestines as a jump rope if you caught me with that book.”

“I know. But the plan’s changed. Do you know what the number forty-two looks like?”

“Yeah, it looks like a gallows with a snake next to it.”

Rotnart blinked and shook his head. “If you’re short a doll, there’s another one buried with the book and sword right in front of the tree. I don’t know if Discord is a kid or not, but it’s worth a shot. You know where to look for these things, right?”

“Sure, I got it on the map.” Rabuf then proceeded to pull out a piece of old, moldy fabric that had a big X on it and nothing else.

The troll king began to massage his temples in exasperation. He was about to ask Rabuf another question when he looked up suddenly. “Yeah, I know. I know they’re coming. Just throw me a bone and I’ll take care of them.”

Rabuf frowned. “Boss, aren’t you coming with me?”

Rotnart looked at his brother for a long moment. “Yeah, I’ll be right behind you. I just got to take care of something first. Just do as I say and everything will be fine. And for hell’s sake, don’t wait for me.”

The younger troll smiled. “You can count on me.”

Rotnart nodded and started walking away from his brother. He then yelled over his shoulder, “Hey Rabuf, that sword by the book is yours, by the way. Happy Nightmare Night. I’ll see you in the hot country.” And with that, Rotnart disappeared into the crowd of costumed opossums.

The Present:

Rabuf smiled at the memory. His brother sure was great. He knew how much Rotnart liked that sword. It was strange though that he was just giving it to him. And what did he mean by, “I’ll see you in the hot country?” Were they taking a vacation to a desert after this? The troll shrugged. He’d have to ponder on these questions later. As he descended the last step of the stone staircase, he took out his map and referenced it. He began counting his steps from the base of the staircase heading straight east. Once he paced off the last of his steps, he bent down and used his meaty hands as shovels. About a minute later he had procured the buried treasure.

Reaching into the hole, Rabuf produced the sword. He unsheathed the blade and marveled at how shiny and sharp it was. “I could shave many a opossum with this,” declared the troll. Images of a troll-staffed barber shop danced in his head. He pulled out the heavy, hide-bound book next. The tome seemed to have a life of its own as he flipped through the pages absently. He could feel the book pulse with dark powers as he cradled it in his hands. The young troll’s eyes began to burn as he skimmed over the eldritch runes and words. He shook his head and put the book down to grab the last item. Grasping the doll by its long serpentine body, he unearthed the strangest doll he had ever seen. “And you must be Discord,” the troll said to the doll. “My brother told me about you. He said to put you in the Tree of Harmony thing if I don’t have enough tiny opossums. I hope you don’t mind?” Then something occurred to the troll, and a sinking feeling came over the troll’s stomach. “Speaking of which . . .”

The troll emptied his sack that contained the small opossums that had not been sold at Filthy Rich’s stand. Only three dolls fell out onto the ground. After adding the Discord statue to the pile, he found that he was still one doll short. He patted himself down to see if he had hidden away any other small dolls. But all he found were a couple adult opossum dolls and the jackalope figure. Rabuf frowned; none of these would work. The troll shrugged. “Well, guess I gotta go back to Opposumville and get some more. They’ll be so glad to see me.”

Before Rabuf could head for the staircase, he noticed a young squirrel in the white tree. The troll stared at the animal for a moment and then looked down at his collection of kid-dolls. He nodded to himself. “Worth a shot,” he said quietly. The troll cleared his throat and did his best squirrel impression. The mammal looked down from its perch and glared at the new comer. Rabuf stopped talking, his cheeks reddened with embarrassment. “Oopsie, uh, let me rephrase that . . . squeak, squirk, sqwak, squakinoff.”

At this point the squirrel started hurling whatever it could get its little paws on, all the while cussing up a blue-streak at the troll. Rabuf recoiled in shock at the youngling’s viciousness. He was very polite when he asked the little guy if he wanted to be turned into a wooden figure. He even said, “please.” A simple “no” would have been enough; there was no need for all this aggression and bad language. The squirrel was so upset, it lost its balance and fell out of the tree.

The troll sprang into action. With a running-dive, Rabuf caught the furry creature in the cusp of his hands. The troll sighed in relief as he cradled the squirrel. “Don’t worry, little guy, you’re safe now.” Rabuf frowned when he didn’t hear a reply from the mammal. He looked at the small creature and cringed. “Oh, right. Sorry.” The little squirrel had turned into a doll, frozen in a terrified position.

Rabuf looked at his five dolls dubiously. “I wonder what Rotnart would say about this.” He considered waiting for his brother but shook his head. The Troll King had told him not to. Picking up the ancient tome, Rabuf turned to the desired page. He felt the book vibrate in his hands as if it sensed what was about to happen. Rabuf paused; something felt off with what he was about to do. He couldn’t put his finger on it, but then again he had come too far to quit now. And above all things, he wanted to make his brother proud. With that thought in mind, he touched the book to the tree.

The troll took a few steps backwards. He felt an invisible force push him back like a strong gust of wind. He looked at the Tree of Harmony and frowned. It was exactly the same. Just to make sure, he walked around looking for a gaping hole in the tree to put the dolls in. There was none. The book had fallen to the ground. Bending down Rabuf picked up the book and flipped through it. All the pages were blank, and he no longer felt the pulse of energy from the tome.

Rabuf stood there scratching his head considering the current predicament. “Oh boy, Rotnart is not going to be happy that I broke the tree. Hmmm, what would he do if he was here?” The troll looked up at the tree and screamed, “Work you #*$king piece of $h!t!” At that moment he felt that invisible gust of energy again. This time it was coming from behind him. The troll stumbled forward and nearly fell but righted himself just in time. He looked behind him and watched a spectacle very few had ever witnessed.

Trailing the gust were legions of black spirits highlighted in the Tree of Harmony’s bright majesty. They slithered and glided forward just above the forest floor, pouring over the sheer cliff face and staircase. The ghosts came from all directions heading straight for the white tree. Slowly, the ancient tree turned a morbid shade of black and began to droop like a weeping willow. The bark flaked off exposing the rotting underside. Rabuf gazed in fascination as an enormous cavity formed on the side of the transforming tree.

The troll sighed in relief. Grabbing the five dolls, Rabuf marched into the hole and placed the five dolls on top of five shelves built to cradle the troll’s source of power. This only seemed to accelerate the Tree of Harmony’s metamorphism. Green pods began to form on all the branches, starting out the size of tiny buds but rapidly growing into apple-sized vessels. In each pod was one of Rabuf’s brothers or sisters. When the pods grew too heavy, they would fall from the tree and grow.

Rabuf reveled in the moment with a great grin on his face. He had done it. A new troll kingdom will be born.

“That’s quite a sight. You have done well.”

The young troll turned to regard the familiar voice. There before him was the Pony Shadows in all her dark glory. “Well, hi, great black opossum of the under-castle. What are you doing here? I thought you couldn’t leave the castle. And have you seen my brother? He’s late for the fun.”

The ghostly alicorn regarded the troll for a moment before saying, “That book of yours released all the evil spirits shackled to the earth for miles around, including yours truly. Ever since you two intruded upon my lair, I have been watching through your brother’s eyes. I knew exactly what his plan was and was able to prepare myself accordingly. I have no intention of feeding your incubator like those other pour souls are now doing.”

Rabuf blinked and looked at the river of ghosts streaming into the roots of the tree. “Oh, is that what’s going on? I thought there was another party going on down there, and you had to be dead to attend.”

The pony of shadows cleared her throat to get the troll’s attention. “As to the fate of your brother, I’m afraid the worst has happened.”

Rabuf raised a shaggy eye-brow. “He bit his tongue?”

“No.”

“He stubbed his toe?”

“No.”

“He ran out of toilet paper?”

The dark alicorn bit back a frustrated scream. She took a deep breath and replied, “He’s dead. The ponies captured him and tortured him to death with milk.”

The young troll stared at the ghost for a moment. “What?”

“I saw it through your brother’s eyes. The King of the Trolls is dead. You are now the leader of this new generation of trolls. Rotnart sacrificed himself for you so you could get here and raise this army. He asked me to be your advisor and help guide you as King before he died.

Rabuf shook his head in disbelief, tears forming in the corners of his eyes. “No. No he can’t be. He’s supposed to be here. We need to rescue him. We can’t leave him in the hooves of the opossums. They’ll cut off his head and lay their eggs in his ears.”

The Pony of Shadows nodded her head. “You’re right, your highness. We’ll recover Rotnart’s body, and then the ponies must pay. When these pods fall, we will have an army the likes of which Equestria has never seen in centuries. We will reduce this kingdom to submission in a week.”

Rabuf wiped away his tears and looked up at the growing pods blossoming on the branches of the corrupted tree. “We’re coming, brother.”

Comments

[BradtheBrony]

Heh, funny stuff. And things are getting "super cereal" now.

[Lunar Pitch]

New chapter, Instant read and enjoyment also, Willie is Irish? never knew that or is it Scottish, oh well good to know

[Emerald Harp]

8271650
You know it.

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A part Irish, and part Northern Irish. He has a little bit of orange and green in him.

[Captain-Brony]

Whoooaaaaa! Tree of Harmony got taken down

[Emerald Harp]

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ponies.hexstream.net/images/crazy-twilight/crazy-twilight-evil-smile.jpg

Heh, heh, heh.