Scootaloo sighed. I wish I could tell my friends, but I am so embarrassed. How could I tell them that when I saw the Changelings battling the Royal Guard for control of Canterlot, that I wanted to be one of them...one of the Changelings? That I want to ride with the Hive...that I want to be one of their loving family? At the very least they would be horrified, maybe even disgusted with me. Perhaps they might even turn me in to the Royal Guard for an interrogation or worse. It's one of the most shocking things that a pony could ever wish to be. But then at least I could sleep in a bed instead of on the streets or in the public parks or the CMC Clubhouse. She met Babs Seed walking down the street and Babs said to her "Scootaloo, you look a bit unhappy. Would you like to come to my house and talk in private?" Scootaloo nodded. It was getting cold now as summer turned into autumn, and not having a house to live in, she stayed at her friend's houses as much as she could, always joining any sleepover that was going on, and never staying too long in case she outstayed her welcome. It had been this way since she was a young filly. So a few minutes at least at the house of Babs Seed would provide some much needed warmth and perhaps something to eat.
When they were in Bab's house Babs asked her "Scootaloo, what's wrong? Since we first met I have rarely seen you so unhappy. Have Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon been bothering you again? Whatever the problem is, I want to know about it." Scootaloo backed away up against the wall. "Babs, do you promise not to tell anypony about this? This has to remain between ourselves."
Babs nodded and Scootaloo blushed deeply and said "Babs...I...I want to be a Changeling! I want to join a Changeling swarm and ride with them and do everything that they do. I want to be loved...I want to have a family. I don't have one...my mother died when I was a young filly and my father rejected me and threw me out of the house several years ago. I'm homeless. It's not that bad in summer, there is plenty of fresh grass and berries to eat and it's warm too and rarely rains at least in town. But when it gets cold, and the grass starts to die, I have to share your food, shoplift from shops, beg, or busk. My skateboard is all that I own. I stay at any sleepover that I can get to, otherwise I sleep in the bushes or under bridges or sometimes in the CMC clubhouse and stay out of the way of the Royal Guards. As a changeling I would have a loving family again...an entire swarm."
"Scootaloo, are you serious about this or is it a joke of yours?" Babs asked her gently.
"I am serious...I want more then anything to be a Changeling."
To Scootaloo's immense shock and surprise there was a flash of green flame and where Babs Seed had stood, there was a black-shelled, green winged changeling of the kind that had invaded Canterlot. Rather then scream or panic Scootaloo stood her ground and grinned. "You are amazing...can you make me one too?"
Babs Seed took her old shape and said "No...but I can put you on the path to becoming one. But first hear me out. Whilst there are many wonderful things about being a changeling, it's not all that you think it is. It's not all crafty undercover work at least, not at first, and certainly it won't be for you, a pony who wants to become a changeling. Changelings are always suspicious of those who want to join their ranks, in case they either can't cope with it or worse, are spies or even would be assassins. But I know you so well and you are no spy or killer, and I trust you and think your wish to be a changeling is genuine, so I'll start by teaching you Changeling 101, otherwise known as basic changeling protocol. Only Changeling Queens can turn ponies into changelings, and contrary to the beleifs of some ponies and griffins they never do so lightly."
"First, there are four main Hives known as the Big Four...Miasma's, Chrysalis's which is the one that I belong to, Aractnia, and Necrotia. Hive Miasma does not like Hive Chrysalis and they have been feuding for years. Aractnia works with griffins, and griffin love is much harder to gather then that of ponies. Necrotia, well, the less said about them the better. Tonight I'm going to take you to meet the fellow changelings of my chapter. Don't expect them to shake hooves when you first meet or be particularly friendly until they get to know you. Don't call them Bro or Sis. You have never shared your love ration with one of them who is sick or injured, or stood and fought to enable one of them to escape a fight, or taken a punishment for one of them who did something wrong. You have not earned the right to call them your brothers or sisters. Show them respect, they love that. Oh, and this is very important...don't touch their wings. Changeling wings are a lot more sensitive then pony wings and unfortunately are weaker too, and as such they are very protective of them. Touch one once, you'll most likely just get a warning not to do it again, do it again and you'll get a hoof in the face. Do you still want to meet my chapter?"
Scootaloo nodded and Babs Seed took her to a house quite near Sugarcube Corner and tapped three times on the door. "Let me in, I'm with a friend of mine who wants to be a friend of ours."
The door opened and Babs and Scootaloo walked in. The room was full of undisguised changelings, chatting to each other, drinking cider and playing pool. They fell silent and all eyes were on Scootaloo until Babs took changeling shape again and said "She's with me, she wants to hang around here," and everything went back to normal. Scootaloo accidently brushed against the green translucent wing of a changeling, who spun around, grinned, and said politely "The next time you do that, pony, I'm going to wrap my cue stick around your head," and went back to his game.
"The Chrysalis Hive has a saying "Three can keep a secret if two of them are dead." Scootaloo, you may be one of my best friends, but if you inform on us, I will cut your bucking throat, understand?" Babs said. "Now, tell them why you want to be one of us."
"I have no family, my mother died and my father threw me out. I want to know I am valued and loved, and what better way to find love then as a member of a Changeling Hive? This Hive, Hive Chrysalis."
A large Changeling with a dent on his shiny black carapace beckoned her over. "So you want to be one of us, do you? Well, most changelings are born from eggs, not made. If you want to join this chapter, first you just need to hang around a little, and let us get to know you. Then we'll take you to our Hive and you get to become a prospect-a Changeling without wings or changing ability yet. For a while, you'll need to do the hard and dirty work of the Hive. Things like digging new tunnels and shoring them up, guard duty, bringing Changelings cups of love, maybe even latrine duty. After anything from a few weeks to up to a year, you'll earn your wings and be taught your full Changing abilities and be one of us. From then how far you rise is up to your talents and luck. The best job that the average Changeling can get is that of infiltrator, when you get to replace a pony and life as that pony, basking in the love of that pony's family and friends...and sending some of the love back to the Hive of course. If you want an easy life...you could always choose to be cocooned instead."
Scootaloo shook her head. "No thank you."
"One on all, all on one. If one of your fellow Changelings is ever in a fight, be it military in nature or a bar brawl, you must always enter the fight on that Changeling's side, even if it means you get hurt, arrested or both. I got this on my carapace helping out one of my brothers, and I don't regret it a bit. If I had to I would do it all over again. Now contrary to what you might think, we don't generally fight a lot. Apart from the legal and physical risks, fighting interferes with our primary aim, the collection of love for the Hive and ourselves. We fight in emergency self defence, to protect our cover, to protect our interests including from other Hives, or, very rarely, in an army when our Queen summons us to do so. If we can avoid fighting so much the better. Many Changelings get to avoid fights through their whole lives, but if it happens, always come to the aid of your brothers and sisters. They will do the same for you."
"Do not worry about my loyalty."
The Changeling continued. "Snitches are a dying breed. If you ever inform to the Royal Guards or indeed to anypony or anybody on another Changeling, even if that Changeling is not of our Hive and hates us, if we find out and we catch you, we will kill you and eat your body down to the bones, and leave the bones in a public place as a warning. Now, it's possible you could escape, perhaps Canterlot Intelligence will put you in a witness protection program. But even then you will spend the rest of your life wondering if we will one day track you down. Understand?"
"I understand."
"Blood in, blood out. As one of your final tests to become a full Changeling, you will have to help entrap a pony. As for leaving the Hive, you only get out by dying, naturally or otherwise. I'm going to give you one chance...if you want to leave now, you can walk out of that door, but if you choose to stay, there is no going back."
"I really do want to become a Changeling."
"Well....eat that meat then. It's chicken, not pony meat." And he pointed to a chicken breast on the table. Scootaloo's stomach churned but she forced herself to bite into it, to the laughter of the changelings in the room, and to her surprise she found it tasted good.
"Hey, maybe you have what it takes to make it after all."
After a few days hanging out with the changelings and getting to know them she was told "Tomorrow we're going to take you to the Hive itself out in the Badlands, where you will meet Her Majesty and start the prospect stage. Things will be hard, but remember how good it will be once you earn your wings and your full changeling abilities."
"I....I can't fly, there is something wrong with my wings."
"We'll rig up a basket for you. Once you become a full Changeling, your new wings will work perfectly well and after a few days or weeks of flight training you will be as able to fly as any of us. Meet us here at 9:00AM tomorrow. If you are not here we will fly off and leave you behind."
The next day Scootaloo went to meet them, very excited and a little bit worried about what would happen next.
A few grammatical errors and the paragraphing was weird. Also its very fast paced.
Other than that I love the premise and I will look forward to more. Have a like and fav!
You make good Changeling stories.
This was good so far, and I'll favorite it so I can see any updates to it, but I have some personal constructive criticism for you. I like it was rushed a bit in this chapter, and that some stuff should be made more clear. By clear, I mean having context or dialogue that answered questions like "If Babs Seed was a changeling, then where's the real Babs, cocooned or was there never a real Babs? Also, it would help to know when this story takes place in comparison to the series.
By it being rushed, I mean that there wasn't much of an introduction, but that's of little importance, the story is really what matters. What really bothered me was when you simply went from her first day with the Changelings to "after a couple days," and that leaves a massive cluster of unanswered questions and possibilities to the reader. Questions and possibilities such as what she did there, whether it was standing there doing nothing the whole time, socializing, fighting, etc., or anything that happened during those days that wasn't inside that building as well. So far we've seen nothing to do with her friends, other than the brief mentioning of their names and sleepovers, and I'd think that they would have had something to say at some point (or multiple) about Scootaloo "not being around as much" or her suddenly being more secretive or spending more time "thinking" than usual, etc.
I mean, the story's good, but it's not great, and it leaves a little bit more than usual to the reader. I haven't read any of your other stories, so I can't know if it's your style or anything, but I'd just like to see more insight on what's going on outside (outsight?) of the Changeling house. That's just my two cents, I hope you take it into consideration, have a great day .
i don't mind the premise. Actually i love it, and the concepts are pretty neat too. The only thing is the 2 paragraph shift in Scootaloo going from "i could never tell anyone" to "Bab's can you keep a secret." Why admit it to Bab's? Why is Bab's in Ponyville? Or is Scootaloo in Manehatten for some reason? What is the setting they're in? How long has it been since the wedding?
Not trying to come down on you but the story could use a little embellishment before hitting your readers with the big reveal.
Personally i'm a bit of a continuity whore so i don't like big gaps of time where an unknown type or amount of progress is made. So (again i stress this is just a personal thing) the several days of getting to know the changelings would be nice to have embellished as well. Other than that i think i'll look forward to seeing the next few chapters and find out where you start taking this.
3737027 I'll try and make the next chapter better for you.
3736887 You're right, a better writer then me could have made this a lot better-but it's far from a total failure or you would not have read it.
3737027 Yes, really this chapter could have been easily twice as long and she (and the readers) could have got to really know the changelings.
Please continue on this story. Even if it sometimes makes no sense. But I still want to see what becomes of Scootaloo.
3737910
Please don't take what I said in a bad way, I'm not saying you're a bad writer at all, this story is still enjoyable to read, and has a plot that I haven't seen before, so that gains originality. What I'm saying is that to have your story gain a larger audience, it could use a bit of refurbishing. My recommendation would be to get an editor to help insert or take out details or little errors, respectively, or even a co-author (or the same editor) to help fill in where you may have missed important details. I still hope to see more, no matter what your decision is.
Interesting concept. Favorited.
I know you watch Siansaar on deviantart, or have at least browsed his gallery.