.......there is no way in hell's deepest pit a unicorn filly could kill twilight. also no way in hell's deepst pit a unicorn horn could pierce spike so easily let alone fatally.
though I guess the biggest fact is there is no way in hell the element bearers could both bear witness to derpy's demise and be the element bearers at the same time.............................. really hate the forced characterization.
Her next target is Rarity and Sweetie Belle......*Sigh*.......Dinky must be stopped. I hope the princess Celestia and Luna know about this. Dinky is making me angry now.
3838138 Yeah, that's my whole reason for writing this story. How they were in the original story disgusted me, so I wanted to do something about it by writing this grimdark story where they are all going to pay. Fan fiction is fun, isn't it?
3838755 ........i find it half annoying and owuld avoid if it not for those few gems out there. and if the endign disgusted you tehre are a thosuand other things that could ahve been done without a foal somehow overpowering the most powerful unicorn known in equistria, having a dragon somehow breached by a filly's blunt little horn, and so on. or you could have created a story where you had derpy awakening from it like some nightmare, and realizing that something is mentally attacking erveryone in ponyville, also causing equially horrific dreams. make it that instead of attacking a killstory with another killstory, use it to inspire something else.
3838161 Sorry, you're happy ending is in another story. This is Grimdark, and every deserving pony is going to die. However, some certain ponies will be spared. The hint is in the 4th post.
3838777 Really? Well. I'm going to be surprised what will happen in the next chapter. True it is a Grimdark. But still, Dinky needs to be stopped. I'm just glad the Princess Celestia and Luna didn't went to see the Derpy's execution. And it seems Zecora's warning was true.
3838811 Actually... Celestia did. If you read the original story, she came near the climax of the excecution. But I'll leave her part in the story a surprise.
3838855 Ok then. What Princess Luna? I don't think she was there. And plus I'm just surprised that everypony in ponyville is going to get killed by a filly name Dinky. I'm not surprised. And plus I know Dinky wants revenge but even Derpy is in heaven. What will Derpy think of this? I just don't know what went wrong.
3838875 Nice one; but yeah, Luna wasn't there, but what happens with her will be unknown. I know some people aren't going to like how it ends, but that's the risk of writing a story such as this. As for DInky... let's just say the forest changed her; sorry Derpy.
Poor Derpy
.......there is no way in hell's deepest pit a unicorn filly could kill twilight.
also no way in hell's deepst pit a unicorn horn could pierce spike so easily let alone fatally.
though I guess the biggest fact is there is no way in hell the element bearers could both bear witness to derpy's demise and be the element bearers at the same time.............................. really hate the forced characterization.
Her next target is Rarity and Sweetie Belle......*Sigh*.......Dinky must be stopped. I hope the princess Celestia and Luna know about this. Dinky is making me angry now.
3838197 ? Um...ok?
3838138
Yeah, that's my whole reason for writing this story. How they were in the original story disgusted me, so I wanted to do something about it by writing this grimdark story where they are all going to pay. Fan fiction is fun, isn't it?
3838755 ........i find it half annoying and owuld avoid if it not for those few gems out there.
and if the endign disgusted you tehre are a thosuand other things that could ahve been done without a foal somehow overpowering the most powerful unicorn known in equistria, having a dragon somehow breached by a filly's blunt little horn, and so on.
or you could have created a story where you had derpy awakening from it like some nightmare, and realizing that something is mentally attacking erveryone in ponyville, also causing equially horrific dreams. make it that instead of attacking a killstory with another killstory, use it to inspire something else.
3838161
Sorry, you're happy ending is in another story.
This is Grimdark, and every deserving pony is going to die.
However, some certain ponies will be spared. The hint is in the 4th post.
3838777 Really? Well. I'm going to be surprised what will happen in the next chapter. True it is a Grimdark. But still, Dinky needs to be stopped. I'm just glad the Princess Celestia and Luna didn't went to see the Derpy's execution. And it seems Zecora's warning was true.
3838811
Actually... Celestia did. If you read the original story, she came near the climax of the excecution. But I'll leave her part in the story a surprise.
3838855 Ok then. What Princess Luna? I don't think she was there. And plus I'm just surprised that everypony in ponyville is going to get killed by a filly name Dinky. I'm not surprised. And plus I know Dinky wants revenge but even Derpy is in heaven. What will Derpy think of this? I just don't know what went wrong.
3838875
Nice one; but yeah, Luna wasn't there, but what happens with her will be unknown.
I know some people aren't going to like how it ends, but that's the risk of writing a story such as this.
As for DInky... let's just say the forest changed her; sorry Derpy.
3838885 The Everfree Forest change Dinky?
3838897
That is all I will say.
3838968 Ok
The sole reason luna wasnt at the execution: gaming. And who gives a fuvk about the rest of equestria?
Is it wrong that I think none of the characters have been tortured enough?
Eh, maybe I'm a sadistic bastard.
Anyway, I can't wait to see Dinky slowy carve somepony's face.
I stand corrected dimound and silver
The moral of this part is to not bully people nothing is gained but hatred
'“Have your men squandered all over town and be on the lookout for this… killer. Whoever it may be, they are not going to get away with this.”'
what are men
woops
I'm not sure that "squandered" is the word you're looking for.