A Beautiful Swallow

by Skijarama

The Fragile

The next two or so months passed without anything interesting happening. Swallow and I kept sending letters to each other, though. I remember she was able to get those bullies dealt with appropriately, which was good. Now, looking back on this, I realize that I picked up a lot on my surroundings without even really thinking about it. For example, Starless Night was very quiet and always kept to herself. She had a small circle of friends she always spent time with, but aside from them she always seemed to be a loner.

And even when she spent time with them, she always seemed to prefer sticking to herself. It was odd, really, as I'd never been able to read fillies before at any level. Yet with her, I could tell genuinely what emotion she was feeling even from a large distance. I didn't even really notice, at the time. It was almost like she was an open book to me with a lot of the words blurred. The general feeling was there, but the reasons or situations were lost to me.

But that wasn't what was bugging me. What was bugging me was the fact that Swallow had recently fallen ill. I didn't know the specifics, but it was slowing down her letters considerably. However, amongst that fog there was a point of good news. She was hoping to convince her parents to spend the night in Ponyville during Nightmare Night at some point. She didn't make any promises, but it was still a point of hope.

It was the beginning of the next school week when a turn took place. Something I frankly wasn't expecting. And it would lead into a series of events that to this day I question. Every time I think of this chain of events, I find myself questioning exactly what I was thinking. I'm still drawing a blank on that.

<^><^><^><^>

The sun was just barely peeking over the horizon. I was really early on the school grounds today. I didn't really care that much, as it would give me proper time to go over what I needed to do over the course of the week. There were a couple essays coming up, and I had been stalling on those. I began running through in my head how best to go about getting all of that set up and done. I seated myself at a tree, and dug into my saddlebags for my research rubric.

A sudden sound caught my attention. It was behind the schoolhouse, and it sounded like a hard impact on wood. I hesitated, and returned to my saddlebags, only for the noise to repeat itself. I sighed, set down my saddlebags, and made my way for the back of the school house. I wasn't sure what to expect, but what I found startled me to standing still.

Starless Night was there, her forehead pressed against the wood of the house and tears streaming down her cheeks. I watched silently for a second as she sat back. What the hay was she doing? Another instant later, and she slammed her forehead into the wood with a considerable amount of force. The sound made me cringe, now that I was closer. I acted on instinct, and galloped towards her.

I know she heard me, as her ears perked up. She didn't move to leave or try and tell me off, instead she simply smashed her head once more into the wall. A moment later, and I was next to her, wrapping my forelegs around her, and yanking her away from the wall. She grunted as we collapsed to the ground, and turned an angry purple eye towards me. “Get lost!” She hissed, before slamming her hoof into my gut.

She was strong, despite how skinny she was. Then again, it might have simply been that I wasn't expecting the blow. The air got knocked out of me as I released her and clutched at my gut. She got up and glared down at me. Her eyes were bloodshot, and stained with tears. I slowly stood up, keeping my eye on her the whole while. “Ugh... What the heck was that for?!” I demanded.

“That was for not minding your own business!” Starless snapped at me, glare intensifying.

“Look, I don't know what's going on, but if I see somepony trying to beat their own brains out on the wall of the school I attend, I like to think it's reasonable to investigate and end the self-harm.” I said, groaning after as the pain in my gut flared slightly.

Starless scoffed at me. “This has nothing to do with you, so just walk away.” She said angrily, stomping a hoof for emphasis.

“I don't care that it has nothing to do with me. All I want is to know why you were hurting yourself.” I said, leveling out my tone to sound calm.

“It's a long and complicated story, and I don't want to tell it to a stranger.” She said, her voice growing quieter. Her eyes lowered slightly, and I saw tears welling up in the again. My eyes widened slightly when she started trembling, and she let out a quiet sob.

“Hey... what happened to you?” I asked carefully.

“Why do you care?” She demanded through the near silent crying. She was keeping her tone level and calm, despite the fact she was crying.

“I... I'm not sure. You’re my class mate, so I guess I just want to make sure you’re okay, at least.” I said, choosing my words carefully.

Starless looked back up at me with an unbelieving gaze. “I don't buy it. Nopony has ever cared before.” She said quietly, also sitting.

“What about your family?” I asked, though I had a feeling the answer wouldn't be a good one.

“They don't care either.” Starless muttered, closing her eyes.

“I find that hard to believe. But even if that's the case, there are ponies that care. I've seen you hanging out with your friends, so their must be somepony who cares.” I said, carefully glancing over my shoulder. A disruption right now would be bad.

“They don't ever seem to get it. Please, just go away.” Starless said, looking back up at me. Her eyes had this pleading look to them, and I found I no longer wished to intrude. I sighed heavily, and started to turn away.

“I'll go on one condition.” I said, looking back over at her.

“What?”

“Stop hurting yourself.” I said, and walked away.

<^><^><^><^>

The next few days sped by, and I now found myself keeping my eye on Starless. She never looked at me, but just kept to herself. I checked behind the school house every day and found that she had stopped beating her head there, unless she simply chose a different time to do that. Either way, I chose not to disturb her, and instead focused on getting my grades up. Things began to blur together for me. Swallows letters started coming more frequently, and it was confirmed that she'd gotten over her illness.

I couldn't help but smile when I read that. It had been a pretty rough sickness, if her descriptions were accurate. I have no doubt they were, but still. The time continued to fly, days turning to weeks, and weeks turning to months. I eventually forgot about the time I found Starless pounding her head into the wall. The end of the school year was rapidly approaching, and I began to grow excited. However, maybe two weeks before the last day of school, the time I stopped Starless from hurting herself on the school wall would re-enter the foreground of my mind.

<^><^><^><^>

The final bell rang for the day, and I started to make my way home. It was a cloudy day, and rain was scheduled for later. Luckily, today had been fairly easy, and light on the stress. I glanced up, however, as I heard a shout. A few ponies were standing, dumbfounded, as Starless Night galloped away from them, another pony with a bright blue coat and a silver mane hot on her tail. Starless' head was down, and the other pony looked worried. Starless glanced up, tears in her eyes, and unfurled her wings. At her age, flying shouldn't have been a problem if she could focus, but I saw anything but focus in her eyes.

I saw desperation in her eyes. Desperation and fear. She flapped her wings hard, and lifted off of the ground, flying straight for me. I ducked, allowing her to soar straight over my head. The pony chasing her, now visible as a male, shot past me, and the other two followed after. “Just let her go, Mint!” One of the two shouted at the blue one. He came to a stop, watching as Starless flew off.

One of the two, a faded green female unicorn with a purple mane, came up to his side, and rested a hoof on his shoulder. “It's okay, Mint. She'll come around,” she said gently, looking at Mint sadly. “But you should still apologize.”

“I don't even know what I said!” Mint snapped, glaring at his friends. Then his eyes fell on me, and he paused. I took a step back, wanting to just run for home. Mint slowly walked up to me, green eyes searching.

“Uh... can I help you?” I asked hesitantly, leaning away slightly.

“You're Stinging Nettle, right?” Mint asked, ignoring my prior question.

“Yes, why?” I said, feeling more and more nervous by the second. Mint's gaze was piercing.

“Can I ask a favor of you?” he asked suddenly, and I raised an eyebrow.

“Depends, what is it?”

“Can you go and check on Starless for me? I heard about how you got her away from the wall. I think she might listen to you.” Mint said, piercing gaze softening slightly. I looked at him in confusion.

“Why would she listen to me? The last time I approached her, she smacked me in the gut.” I said, wincing at the memory.

“Well, she stopped hurting herself. And she said it was you that made her stop. She listened to what you had to say, and actually acted on it. I’ve never been able to do that.” Mint pressed, taking another step closer. The look in his eyes was practically begging me to do him this favor. “Please, I just want to know she’s going to be okay.”

“Ugh… alright, but I’m not going in blind,” I finally relented after several moments. “Tell me what happened.”

“I’m not exactly sure what set her off like that. I simply asked her how one of her friends was doing, and she ran off.” Mint explained, lowering his gaze slightly.

“Did something happen between them?” I asked cautiously, figuring I could see where this was going.

“I don’t know, but based on her reaction, I can only assume so…” Mint said, leading into a short silence.

“Alright, I’ll talk to her.” I said, and started walking at a brisk pace after Starless. I heard Mint utter a quiet thank you before I was out of earshot. I wandered around for a little bit, looking at the spots I normally spotted her at in passing. She wasn’t at any of them, and I couldn’t help but pick up the pace a bit. From what I’d seen, she had been pretty upset, and I didn’t even know her. I began to figure I should find Mint and see if I could get any answers out of him about where I could find her when I heard a quiet sniffle.

I paused and my ears twitched. I heard it again, clearer this time, now that I had stopped moving. I was right next to the school house, and I felt my ears droop against my head. The sniffling was coming from behind the school house. I slowly started walking, figuring I wouldn’t like what I was about to see. I didn’t like it at all, but it wasn’t as bad as I thought. Starless was sitting there with her back to the schoolhouse, gazing down at the ground. I hesitated, and just watched her.

She was a mess. Her mane was ruffled up, her coat was dirty and from what little I could see of her eyes, they were bloodshot. I slowly made my approach, trying to be as quiet as possible. “I can hear you, ya know.” She muttered. I threw being quiet out the window and picked up the pace a little bit.

I didn’t say anything at first, but came to a stop when I was a few paces away. She looked up at me, making eye contact. Her eyes were definitely bloodshot. “What do you want?” She asked quietly, voice hoarse.

“I want to make sure you’re going to be okay. I saw you flying off and your friends looked really worried about you.” I replied, keeping my voice as gentle as I could. She grunted and looked away.

“I’ll be fine…” She mumbled, barely audible.

“Well, clearly you’re not fine right now. Is there anything I can do to help?” I asked, bending my knees slightly so as to be at eye level with her. She muttered something, but it wasn’t audible. I shifted a little closer. “Huh? What was that?”

“Kill me…” She said, louder this time. Everything seemed to freeze at that moment as my eyes widened. She wanted to die? I didn’t believe her.

“Don’t say things like that. Whatever you’re going through can’t possibly-“

“You don’t get it!” Starless snapped at me, causing me to shut my mouth and listen. “Nopony ever gets it! I have to go day by day with parents who never look out for me. I have to deal with ponies who take advantage of my stupidity, ponies that lie to me, hurt me, and leave me when I need help the most!” She was screaming now, and her eyes were starting to get wet again. I was silent, dumbfounded at her words. I didn’t know how much was exaggeration, but clearly this was serious if she was legitimately crying.

“Then how about this?” I suddenly said, words leaving my mouth before I really even processed what I was saying. “How about I stick by your side, and help you out? At least until you’re better?”

“W-what?” Starless asked, glancing up at me with a shocked expression. I put on a smile.

“I’m not sure what all is going on, but I can tell it’s pretty bad. I’ve seen a lot of young foals crying over trivial things that they get over really rapidly. But you, on the other hoof, are crying from things that are far more serious. I know that because of how long you’ve been like this. I’m volunteering to help you get through those problems.” I explained, standing up fully. Starless stared at me, with a mix of surprise and joy on her face. It suddenly darkened into a look of suspicion, however.

“How can I trust you?” She asked, standing up to look at me. “I don’t even really know you. Why do you want to help me?”

“Because I’m having to sit through a broken heart. It isn’t something I’d wish upon anypony. If I can, I’ll take every step possible to lift you out, even if only because I don’t like seeing ponies cry.” I said, and she looked down. For several seconds it was silent. Then she started to walk towards me. A few seconds later, and I found she was hugging me. My mind shut down for a second as she squeezed me close.

“Thank you…” She muttered quietly.

<^><^><^><^>

I brought Starless back to her friends, who then talked to her in private while I headed home. Starless and I agreed that we would meet behind the school-house in the mornings to talk, which I felt good about. Something about helping a pony in need made me feel good. I soon made it home, where mom passed me a letter from Swallow.

Nettle,

Schools almost out for the year over here and, if I recall correctly, it’s almost out for you as well. My family is planning our summer vacation, but hasn’t decided on where to go yet. I asked them about it, and we might be going to Ponyville over the summer! I don’t want to get your hopes too high, though, as my parents were never particularly fond of it. I’ll try to drop some subtle hints, as it would be really nice to get to see you and the others again.

So, what’s going on with you? Anything new or special that I should know about?

-Twinkling Swallow.

I felt ecstatic as I read that letter. I might get to see Swallow face-to-face again! This would be far sooner than I anticipated if so. Still, when I finished reading I tried to quell my rising excitement. She said maybe. It wasn’t definite. I still found myself hoping that she could come back, even if only for a couple of weeks. I started on my reply. I don’t remember everything I wrote down, but I do know the last few sentences I put on the paper.

I don’t think I ever mentioned this to you, but shortly after you left for Canterlot, we got a new student at the school. She’s having a really rough time, so I’ve decided I’m going to help her. Her name is Starless Night.