“Well, well, well….” Chelsea’s obnoxiously sarcastic voice addressed me as she smirked. “I suspect that the Manehatten police are well on their way, huh Scatter?”
Several of the offending stallions chuckled, few understanding and the rest just trying to fit in.
“I didn’t make any mistakes this time, coltcuddler.” She bragged, strutting ignominiously. “I’m finally going to get rid of you for good.”
A few of the attackers glared, taking an aggressive hoofstep forward; my tenacity kept me trying to think of a way out of this, at least for mother’s sake, but being thoroughly surrounded was nearly impervious.
“Uh, babe..?” Buckskin asked, trotting up doubtfully. “What exactly do you plan to do?”
Chelsea glared at our traitor sourly, seeming to almost regret kissing him. “Exactly what I said. We’re gonna get rid of him for good and it’ll look like suicide. That’s what the rope there is really for.”
Buckskin recoiled in shock at the straightforward version of the plot, and my mother and I began to hold one another even tighter. I had to have the hope that they’d spare my mother; she wasn’t the one they were after, and the rope I had untied from her seemed only long enough to do that once.
“But that’s murder!” The stallion choked out, looking astonished. “I won’t let you kill him!”
The atmosphere in the room froze as Chelsea’s patience seemed to snap.
“Well, fine then.” She smiled like a sociopath, turning to Buckskin. “I’ll deal with you too.”
Another stallion near Chelsea spun and bucked my ex-friend onto the ground just a few feet in front of my mother and I, exiling him into the same doom that was approaching.
I looked at Buskskin sadly, unable to actually pity him. Just as Chelsea had no remorse for anyone who would side with me, I had no empathy for anyone that would date her and go as far as deceiving a friend for her homophobic cause.
I swallowed hard myself, looking back up to analyze our attackers. There were still twenty ponies willing to go through with this Celestia-damned execution, and that was actually a lot less than the third of the school we were to expect. Either Buckskin had lied about the amount, or a modest fraction of the ponies had enough competence to buck this plan out. Either seemed reasonable.
“I’m glad that’s out of the way.” Chelsea announced. “Let’s get down to business colts…”
All of the hostile ponies in the room smiled wickedly, preparing to spring at us; Buckskin took up a tactically defensive position that put my mother and I in between himself and Chelsea, trying to look intimidating as he crouched.
This was it… We are done.
I didn’t want to die like this; it left me with several regrets. The least of which was that the novel I had been writing throughout my time in highschool neared completion, and I’d never finish. My father, meanwhile, had abandoned my mother and I with such critical timing. I would pass on bad terms with him, and if he regretted leaving at all, I’d never be fortunate enough to know or forgive him. Finally, my greatest regret would be my inability to die with my lover, Soa-
Brrhkkhk!
Thunderously, an explosion of loudly splintering wood rang throughout the warehouse, and everypony in the rotting building quickly looked skyward to the source of the sudden noise.
With powerful bravado, an elegant cyan pegasus dressed in a fully aerodynamic flight-suit landed in front of me, recoiling from the impact in a crouching prone briefly. He brutishly stood upright, extending a large pair of wings, and looked directly into my eyes with a bright, picturesque smile.
...Soarin'.
"Motherbuckers," Soarin' whinnied boldly, opting to stand up on his hind-legs fully.
"The Calvary’s arrived!"
Just as he finished, another violent cacophony of splintering wood erupted, and at least ten more pegasi wearing elegant flight-suits divebombed into the warehouse, beginning to hover above us in defensive intimidation.
Soarin’ spun, looking to the mare leading the attack.
“This time, I’m not bluffing.”
In terrified synchronization, most of the attacker ponies with the exception of Chelsea bolted towards the primary entrance of the warehouse, attempting to escape with the aerial ponypower now significantly stacked against them.
Before any of the cowards managed to reach the building’s exit, the large door opened with a telekinetic sheath encompassing it, and everypony skidded to a halt with the closest one only remaining several meters away.
My eyes widened as, fiercely in the way of the door, stood my father.
At least thirty chrome spatulas organized in a militaristic fashion hovered behind him telekinetically, and on top of that, several Manehatten police officers were visibly trotting towards us in the distance behind him.
Hallelujah.
The full-force of the triple Deus Ex Machina came crashing down on our attackers; Soarin’ bolted into Chelsea, tackling the mare and pinning her to the ground with a forehoof on her back. A tidal wave of weaponized, metallic cooking instrument flew around the warehouse in a tornado, bashing most of the offending students in the head and knocking them out. The remaining survivors were hastily upside-down by the agility and power of what I suspected was Soarin’s trainee squad.
By the time the Manehatten police arrived at the scene, all of our attackers had been fully neutralized, making easy work for a battalion of authorities to cuff them.
Everything unfolded before us in a matter of minutes, mother and I still holding each other.
With adrenaline’s agility, my father trotted over to us, remaining silent as he wrapped us in a melancholy embrace; I felt his tears trickling onto my shoulder. We would have certainly have lot of catching up to do.
Out of the corner of my sight, I saw Soarin’ leaning against one of the crates at the side of the warehouse, looking perpetually awesome in his flight-suit. He noticed my gaze at him, and I smiled.
Soarin’ smiled back at me, adding a subtle wink.
I rolled my eyes, not even bothering to try withholding the hot blush surely painted my muzzle.
I'll give you props for writing a gay fic, which keeps your OC away from the mares, but then it's an OC with a canon character, so those props that were given are immediately revoked. You are left with neither hate nor love from me, which is something that doesn't happen often.
So this is basically a standard angsty romance about a mostly unpopular self-insert colt, except he wants penis instead of vagina. He goes through extremely biased dramatizations of minor events from your own life finds the hoers you want to fuck irl, and gets the guy. my god the originality it is killing me dead halp im dying
3082981 At least the colt is not a black Alicorn with red eyes
3083024
yet
3083030 Was he abused at a younger age?
3083036
yes, by everyone and their mother
i can tell
3082981
You're right in pyrrhic sense.
My goal in this story wasn't originality; it was emotional personality and trying my hand at an exemplar swing of romance. I personally wouldn't devalue it based on the volume of these types of stories existing, but I can see why one would. You've probably read a hundred of stories like this, I'm sure of that.
I like to think I made the distinction of having this be categorized as a homosexual romance story rather than a casually heterosexual story, and that things like family issues and an antagonist with a lot of drama add enough unique aspects to call it not entirely cliché, but I know I'm just being optimistic and it really is overused.
I suppose I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I will thank you for expressing yourself on that. You're the first person to actually express a real negative concern that I can improve based on. I'll make sure the next story I write has a lot more originality in it.
3083043 does Fluttershy adopt him?
kek
I loved how it all ended! Glad she got what was coming to her.
If you ever feel like it or if its possible, could you write a epilogue?
PLEASE continue this!
3085068
I leave to go camping tomorrow for the better part of a week, but I'll probably do an epilogue. Just don't expect it too soon.
3085680 enjoy your camping trip! I will be looking forward to the epilogue when you can post it
That was.... extreme.
Cool