Chapter 1: Inner Thoughts of a Workhorse
The sun was hot, that was the single thought going through the crimson stallion’s head as he plowed the dry, cracked fields of Sweet Apple Acres.
Big Macintosh stopped and looked up at his tormentor as he took a short break, shielding his eyes against the orange ball’s harsh rays.
“Not a cloud in the sky, not that ah was expectin to see one,” he mused to himself.
Wiping his sweat soaked brow and taking a large gulp from his canteen, the large stallion adjusted his familiar collar and continued the long task of plowing the untouched fields.
Looking forward towards the numerous apple trees of his family’s orchard, he couldn’t help but swell with pride. The land of his ancestors still bared an abundance of fruit thanks to his hard work.
The care of this land was Big Mac’s very reason for existing, yet that very thought filled him with a dull emptiness more and more as time went on.
Everyday was the same it seemed. Wake up, eat breakfast, do whatever work the farm needed done that day, eat supper and finally hit the hay. Day after day.
Not that Big Mac was complaining, Celestia only knew what Applejack or Granny would have to say to him if he ever did. Yet he often found himself wondering what it was like to meet other ponies, hang out with his friends (the few he had), or just relax for once.
Applejack did all of those things on a daily basis, and although he would not say he was necessarily jealous of her, he WAS very curious of how that particular life would feel.
She always got to go on grand adventures, being the Element of Honesty and all, saving Equestria and meeting princesses. Although Mac was perfectly content with not having to put his flank on the line on a daily basis, Applejack was far more suited for that job.
What really made him envious of his younger sister though were her friends. She would often go to parties with them, which although he was invited (heck everypony was) he just had too much work to do to attend.
Other times she would go to slumber parties, or lunch, or picnics, or any other amount of fun and interesting things. Sometimes she would even have her friends over to the farm to help with the work.
Those were the times when he got to see HER. That cyan Pegasus with the rainbow colored mane. A smile crept onto his lips as he recalled that pretty mare.
The first time he saw her made him stop dead in his tracks. She was the strangest pony he had ever laid his eyes on, yet at the same time one of the most beautiful. Everything about her screamed different and exciting to him.
It wasn’t just her looks either. The way she carried herself, her confidence, her strive to show everyone that she could do anything. She was everything he was not.
A deep chuckle escaped his muzzle, “Ah never thought a pony could be so colorful, both inside and out.”
Later on Big Mac discovered from his sister that her name was Rainbow Dash and that she was the stunt flyer who always practiced over their farm.
After that, he would always absorb every detail he could get on the rainbow hued pegasus, and his ears would always perk up at the mention of her name. His crimson coat would even become a darker shade of red when thoughts of her entered his head, much to his confusion.
Yet their was no way to escape such thoughts, as it seemed that everywhere he went, somepony was at least mentioning Rainbow Dash in passing.
While working the apple stand he would often overhear ponies talk about her unmatched speed and her ability to do any trick in the book. Other times he would hear stories about her latest crash, which would make him cringe in sympathy.
“It takes a special kinda pony,” Mac smiled to himself as he thought of his own numerous accidents. Such as trying to prove to himself that he could do the impossible feet of lifting 15 barrels of apples at once.
Such thoughts brought up the time Applejack mentioned that Rainbow dreamed of being a Wonderbolt, which she trained for vigorously. Trying to prove to herself, and everypony else, that she could accomplish such a dream.
“I bet she keeps on trainin, even when she’s injured,” Mac gave a firm nod of his massive head.
He would often show a small grin as he heard tales of awe and amazement from the little orange filly who would frequent the farm to play with his sister. That same little filly had also made up a fan club just for her idle.
Mac gave another deep chuckle, recalling his own foalhood idol. However, Super Pony was not as real or tangible as Scootaloo’s hero.
“I wonder how it feels, havin somepony admire ya like that,” Mac questioned aloud.
The crimson stallion released a heavy sigh. By this point in time, it was fairly obvious that he had a crush on that amazing pegasus.
Yet it was because of all these amazing things that he kept his distance. There was no way a simple farm pony like him could possibly catch the eye of a pony like Rainbow Dash. It just wasn’t meant to be.
Mac sighed again and shook the thought from his mind, finally taking note of where he was with his plowing. Still half of the field left.
Looking up at the suns position yet again, he figured the time to be around one in the afternoon. The stallion supposed it was as good a time as any to take his lunch break.
“Hmm, might even have time to get a bit of my project done too” Mac mused to himself, as he unhitched from the plow and trotted off to enjoy his lunch.
First stopping at the barn, Mac looked over both his shoulders to make doubly sure neither of his sisters had followed him by chance.
Upon entering, the large workhorse carefully made his way up to the loft. There he walked to the far corner where a loose pile of hay rested.
After brushing aside the hay, Mac felt around for the loose board that only he knew of and lifted it free. Inside was a dull black case, which he happily took out and then proceeded to replace the loose board and hay.
Slinging the case around his withers, Big Mac made his way out of the barn, closing it tightly behind him.
The stallion smiled as he made his way towards his secret spot, a small pond a good 5 acres away from the farmhouse, where he would get to partake in his favorite activity for the first time in weeks.
As he wandered towards the far end of the orchard, his head held high, Big Mac failed to notice the lone cloud that slowly followed in his wake.
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Well it looks like it's off to a good start, MacDash isn't that common but I am partial to it. And I've also sent in a request to have it added to the MacDash Group.
Definitely tracking.
Your grammar's good for the most part. I only noticed a spelling error in that you wrote 'idle' instead of 'idol'.
Your pacing is also to be admired. I'm more used to longer paragraphs, but I can't say that's a bad thing. Nothing terrible about this so far, but nothing much else spectacular about it either.
Also, Celestias Paladin's request for this to be administered into the MacDash group has been granted.
Keep Writing.
Not bad.
Good start! Always room for more MacDash.
Brilliant start. Exposition feels natural. Flow is consistent. Pacing is slow, but not painful.
9.5/10.0
This is pretty good! If you haven't already, you should try to find an editor for the few typos still left in the fic. Other than that, It's been a long time since I've read new Mac and Dash, so I hope you plan on continuing this soon!
Nice Start! I wonder what mac is up too
And why Rainbow is following him 
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Thank you very much! I just saw that Black has approved it so my story is in the group!
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You're welcome, you've got the Admin for the group and Bronis Maximus on you side as well. I look forward the next chapter
2930367
Thank you very much for the critique good sir! I will take it to heart and do my best, the short paragraphs were kind of an experiment that I really don't know why I did, but I plan on keeping them to keep the flow of the story steady. I'll need to get an editor as well.
2931004
Thank you very much! I do plan on getting an editor to help me out. Currently I use to process of rereading several times and then read it again after the final edit (but you always notice things you want to change). Thanks again!
Can I just say how awesome it is to have two of my favorite writers comment on my story? I couldn't be happier!
2930980
Haha! I will do my best to live up to your score!
(read black text in the most evil tone you know and orange in moronic henchmen tone for full effect)
Yessss, yesssss this will work out perfectly.... I have found what appears to be a good story.... My plan will now come into fruition, and no one will dare stop me! What is my plan you ask? You will see YOU WILL ALL SEE!!! MUAHAHAHA!
But sir, what are you talking about? I thought you just wanted to read a good romance fiction involving a non lesbian Rainbow Dash???
............................Shut up you fool.......
And why are you using the voice changer?
...........I will kill you by shoving the binary code that is this story down your throat....
How will it taste?
..........Excuse me?
Like is it smooth and easy to follow or choppy and with poor spelling?
......Smooth and with good grammer....soooo good, I guess....
Horay!! Im gonna eat a good story!
.......No I will eat the story first so you can't have it....MUHAHAHA!
OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
OH YESSSSSSSS!
But I need to know what happens!!!
NO, now as your punishment go and feed my sharks while I sit here and wait for the next chapter.
That doesn't seen so bad... Where is the shark food?
......I don't have any....
YOU. ARE. A. TERRIBLE. PONY.
......I know....
AHHHHHHH!!!! MY LEG!!!!!!
MUHAHAHAHAHAHA!
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Ha! That was awesome!
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to anyone who might read this. I hope my self appointed mission was successful.
Why thank you, I was feeling quite bored so instead of just complimenting your story I would also bring