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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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... I see what... *sighs* Silly Jason...
Good grief, that was painful to read.
Dude. Author person. Work on your grammar, punctuation and all that. Or, get a pre-reader willing to fix the mess. Please. Otherwise, i'm afraid your story is almost completely unreadable.
To paraphrase Churchill; Two people separated by a common language.
This is going to sound really small, but I love how you refer to fingers/hands as "blunt claws", as ponies don't know what hands are, as seen in Equestria Girls.