Going the Distance

by Primary213

Disaster Strikes

Sweetie Belle and I were in love. We would spend almost all our free time with each other. When we were at school, we were inseparable, and almost everypony knew it in class. I always walked her home after school and made sure she was ok at school. She would always greet me with the same beautiful smile and would always giggle when I would try to make her laugh. I was constantly hitting myself while I was around her to make sure it wasn't a dream, because she was the perfect filly for me.

"We should spend one of our days together, just a full day of doing stuff. You and I only, what do you think?" Sweetie Belle asked me as I looked over to her. I smiled softly at the idea. She took the thought right out of my head.

"That sounds amazing. I would love to do that with you! Wanna do that this Saturday? If you are available." I replied as she put her head on my chest. I smiled and put my hoof around her. Her mane was too beautiful just to look at, and it was silky smooth. That next day I was hanging out with Blaze and he was actually jealous of me!

"Dammit bro, you two look perfect together! Now if only it was me." He said in a saddening tone. I laughed a little and looked over at him.

"Don't worry too much about it Blaze, you'll find the one for you. It just takes time." I reassured him. He looked a tiny bit better. Even though he helped me with Sweetie Belle, he seemed like he didn't think it would actually work out as perfectly as it did. The next couple of days were as usual. Sweetie Belle and I would hang out and we were sometimes visited by her friends, but their visits didn't last long. I was walking her home on the Friday before we would both hang out on the next day. She and I were talking as usual until we reached her house. We stopped in front of it to talk a little more.

"I can't wait until tomorrow! We are going to have so much fun! Plus, I get to spend another day with you." She said as I shook my head to agree. My nervousness from days past had faded away and I could be myself in front of her.

"I know! I can't wait until tomorrow either! Have I ever told you how beautiful you look Sweetie Belle?" I asked her. She looked at me and just started to laugh. Her cheeks became rosey and I just smiled at her.

"Yes you've told me before haha! I just can't believe you find me that beautiful." She responded. I looked at her with a confused face.

"How could nopony not find you beautiful? You just are. It's hard to explain." I said as her cheeks were undoubtably red. She looked over at her house, then back to me.

"Well, I should be getting inside. My sister will start worrying about me if I don't. Bye Morning Mist." She sadly said.

"Ok ill see you tomorrow Sweetie Belle, I love you." I replied as we hugged. When I felt her body, I was blushing and my nervousness was creeping up on me again. When we finished hugging, I watched her walk over toward her house. I turned around and lifted one hoof to start walking home. When I was about to start walking, I heard Sweetie Belle yell out my name.

"Morning Mist wait!" She yelled. I tuned around and saw her running toward me. She hugged me agin, but this time she looked at me and we both locked eyes. We steadily moved closer and closer. "I love you too." She whispered to me and just after she uttered those words, our lips met. For that short couple of seconds that our lips were locked, there wasn't a single worry in the world. My head was clear, and the only word I could think of was love. After we finished kissing, we both opened our eyes again and she walked back to her house. As I turned around, I was still caught in the moment. My eyes were half open as I began walking home.

"Wow, she got the slip on me there. I have to admit, I did not see that coming." I whispered as I walked home. That night, I could only think of tomorrow and her.

When I awoke on the next day, I waited until the time we were supposed to meet in the town. I wanted to run there, because I felt like I was late, but then again I didn't want to smell bad when I got there so I just walked. I sometimes found myself speed walking at times.

"I hope I'm not late! I don't want her to think bad of me." I said to myself as I arrived at the spot we were to meet. She was there, but so were two other ponies. It was her "best friends" Silver Spoon and Diamond Tiara again. I looked at them with rage as they laughed at Sweetie Belle. I ran up to her and jumped in front of her. The other two jumped back.

"What are you doing here Morning Mist? We aren't making fun of you." Silver Spoon said. I looked at her and began to feel the rage building even more.

"Yeah, I mean. She isn't even worth it. She is a loser." Diamond Tiara added. I finally couldn't take enough of their stupidity.

"The only losers I'm seeing here are the two infront of me! In fact, I only see two annoying ponies that won't leave Sweetie and I alone. I protect her because she is a part of me. You two need to go and find yourselves lives because all you do is put Sweetie down and mess with her and her friends. Now leave and I better not see you two messing with her again." I said to them as I advanced toward the two cowering ponies. They didn't say a word after what I had said to them. I they just turned around and walked away.

"Why did you do that? They were bugging me, but you didn't have to be that hard on them." She said softly as I turned around to help her get up.

"I didn't want them to ruin our big day together. Lets try to forget what they've done and let us have the time of our lives! What do you say?" I said to her. I was desperately trying to get her to smile. I saw a smile break her once sad face. It means it had worked and I hugged her. When we stopped hugging and I moved some of her hair from her face to see her beautiful smile. We went off to a restaurant that day then spent some time at the park where we laid down under a tree together and talked. She was laying down with her head on my chest as I looked up to the sky with my two front hooves under my head.

"I've had so much fun with you to say Mist! It's almost like this is a dream! I keep having to reassure myself that this is real life." Sweetie Belle told me as I smiled stupidly.

"I loved today too Sweetie Belle! We have to do this more often! I would love it!" I replied as she still had her head on my chest. She positioned herself so she could look at me. Her happy bright attitude completely changed as she looked at me.

"Well, thing is.....I don't think we can do this again. There is a good reason though. Please let me explain." She said. I sat up and was worried as well. I started to sweat and my fears started to rise within me quickly. I was afraid to ask why, but I did regardless.

"Why though? I don't get why you can't hang out like this again?" I asked her. My fears were at a peak and we both stood up. She looked down for a little bit and she looked back up after building the strength to tell me why.

"It is because my older sister, Rarity wants to live in Canterlot. She found a house there and already bought it. I'm really sorry. I barely found out yesterday that we are moving. I am really sorry." She said rapidly. I was in total shock. It made me shiver just hearing those words come from my angel's mouth. I was in total awe. I couldn't say anything or move for about a minute.

"When d-do you leave?" I asked her shakily. She didn't want to respond, but she knew I needed an answer.

"On Monday night." She said under her breath. I barely heard it, but it made me, once again, shiver. I was just standing there in complete silence.

"You don't have to b-be sorry about that my love." I said slowly. I was torn. I couldn't feel anything at that moment. It felt like a hammer hit my chest and I was gasping for breath. I didn't want to lose my love, not like this.

Comments

[SilentBelle]

So, I just read what you have so far. It's pretty good, though very straight-forward. I feel like there could be a bit more character development for our protagonist here. I enjoy the story and will give it a follow to keep up with it.

Now, on the more technical side:
Your dialogue attributions need a bit of work. You are using your dialogue like this: '"Hi there." He said.' When it should be like this: '"Hi there," he said.' It's all one sentence, so you need the comma instead of a period, and the attribution should not be capitalized unless it is a proper noun.
And on two separate chapters, there were instances of spelling 'ill' instead of ' I'll '
And in one chapters (probably chapter 3 (maybe 2)) you spelled 'castes' when it should be 'cast'
I think there were others that I noticed, but I forgot the specifics.

Anyway, thanks for writing,
~SilentBelle

[Crystal-Paws]

SWEETIE BELLE'S MOVING!?!?! Very nice twist! well played!

[JosephRascon1789]

Damn you!!! This is THE WORST POSSIBLE THING Very well played

[Primary213]

To my readers, the end of this book is near but I am anticipating a sequel to this tragic ending. So stayed updated as I may release the sequel soon!

[chaotic serenity]

oh god they kissed. I just....I just can't. I still see them as kids. Anyways, that was just one minor nitpick. Pretty good chapter, although the twist could have used a bit more buildup.