EThe Time Killer

• MLP: FiM
• Romance
• Comedy
• Mystery

Pinkie's trying to solve a murder, but other things keep distracting her. Like Rarity. And the missing corpse. And Rarity.

• Pinkie
• Rarity

Silent Whisper · 2.1k words  ·  104  4 · 1.4k views

Summary: Pinkie's trying to solve a murder, but other things keep distracting her. Like Rarity. And the missing corpse. And Rarity.

Initial thoughts: I knew from the minute I saw Pinkie Pie as a character in a story about mystery, and murder, this would get rather silly, over the top, and just wow, it didn't leave me down at all. I kept wondering the same things she did, even imagining myself as Pinkie quite often and how I would handle such a delicate situation, without drooling at the lovely enchantress as she sat so perfectly in that chair. BUT there's a mystery here, one we must solve. So the questions is lads and ladies, does this story hit the mark? Yes, yes it does. 10/10. I would score higher if I could.

What I liked: Well, there's a lot. First of all. Pinkie Pie. She's not an easy character to write. A lot of writers write her as too silly or too over dramatic, and that just isn't Pinkie Pie. She's got this certain...flare about her. Like a cupcake. and then you have Rarity, who is the observer in this story, but plays the role of listener so well. And then you have the mystery and build up of the suspense as you want to know who killed Thyme? Dun dun dun.

What I didn't like: Well, if there was anything I didn't like it was that I never truly got a real mystery. It reminds me of being told about this grand spectular event, but not actually being able to see it. Of course this was all incidental for the joke to work, but ACK. Now I wanna read a REAL Pinkie Pie and Rarity noir style book. Does this exist? POINT ME TO IT PLEASE.

Heart of the story: The heart of this story is how it handles both mystery and humor with the perfect blend of both. Most of it is in the mystery/suspense, and the build up but it's also in the comedy. It's like you have your cupcake, the mystery, and the sprinkles on top with frosting is your comedy. It's pure deliciousness, and boy would I gladly recommend it to others. 10/10.

Characterization: Pinkie Pie and Rarity. Two ponies. Two different styles, and yet the way Silent Whisper handles them is brilliant brilliant brilliant. I could go on and on, but I do feel like a little more Rarity would have really have evened it all out. Pinkie Pie can be a bit much at times, but overall it's a great solid characterization of the two. 8/10

Story/Concept: I really havent' seen a Pinkie Pie mystery story before, I'm sure there might be others out there, but for now, this comes off very unique, very fresh, and truly has it's own personal stylistic charm to it. 9/10

Originality/Execution: The way this builds and builds and builds all the way until the cake rises, and you get to smell the warm and delightful smell that the cake is ready. 9/10

Overall score and final thoughts: I loved this story, I'm not even a big fan of Pinkie Pie. (shun me now.) but this is just great stuff. The only thing I've left wanting is for it to actually be a REAL mystery, and not all this build up and effort to turn into a joke about bread rising. If you made it this far I hope you read the story first!

Final score: 10+10+8+9+9=46/50
9.6/10

*headpats*

Glad you liked it. Thanks for the kind review!