So here I am again wondering if I have completed my goal? · 4:01am Dec 10th, 2019
The title says it all I have been trying to figure my self out but in the end I am an anomaly that shouldn't exist in yet here I am still Breathing. I have started to think about what I do to help people and I always feel like I accomplish something and I always feel like I have done the right thing but right after my 13-year old Cat died a few days ago I have been wondering if this my purpose in life is never going to be realized. I believe my life's purpose was to help anyone I can but it has occurred to me that life isn't as moral as I had reasoned to be. People who help other people only get strike down in the end and then the person rises up to the challenge but when you go through so much and you still have to push on it takes a toll. I have and always will give it my all. Although life isn't as dry or cut throat as everyone else says it is. Instead life is like a war zone two completely different sides are fighting and yes sometimes you get lucky but like any war it can change in a single day. I will keep helping people but I am not sure if kindness is really even a virtue anymore. I try to help as many people as I can but I can only help so many and sometimes I have to sacrifice personal friendships over doing the right thing. The ends don't justify the means? It's funny I use to hate that saying when I was littler but now I see what it means. You can sacrifice things to help you but don't forget and don't you for one second say that the end that was justified because it wasn't and you should never sacrifice things unless THAT'S THE ONLY OPTION! I understand that saying now but I still hate it but I guess it's a double edged sword in order to not make people sacrifice their things I have to sacrifice mine but I have always been okay with that but still . It begs the question of when I will be able to live up to my life's purpose or if I am doing this all for nothing. I wished a lot more people would be open to showing kindness or generosity. I see that evil has to exist for heroes to challenge it together but what happens when the evil out number the good? I have been thinking about this for a while now but I always put it in the back of my mind. I am going to help people as much as I can because that's who I am but I have to wonder if other people think about this too.
I am sorry for unloading all of this on you guys.
Oh hi shiou emiya(you sound like archer from fate stay night unlimited blade works honestly I can't give much advice but what I do know is that even when the world and everyone in tryed to push you down try to keep going and keep being atleast a decent person and try to help although you may not be able to help everyone the people you help will help other people and so on n so forth so that's about all I can say
........you sound like you need a hug.
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People can be mean sometimes. Even when you're just trying to help. But you should never stop trying! Keep going no matter how hard it seems. Things will always get better.
.....so, I'm terrible at saying encouraging things. I can never figure out how to put my thoughts into words. But I'm basically trying to say, you make the world a better place. And you shouldn't give that up, because even if it doesn't seem like you're doing anything, people you're nice to are changed forever. A simple act of kindness can change the world.