An update on stuff. SPOILER: Shit sucks. · 10:12pm Sep 30th, 2019
Hi everyone. Due to the recent situation with me being hospitalized after having a complete mental breakdown, my situation with my family has become recently very, um, complicated due to medical bills and the fact that my dad sperm donor still has me on his health plan since I'm under 26 or whatever. He's been trying to hold shit over my head recently and to make a long story short, I've been pretty stressed. I won't go into details.
I've picked up drinking and it's gotten pretty bad. I've been sober the last four days, thankfully, but before that it was bottles of $3 ALDI wine and drinking two bottles per night. At the moment my entire existence is dedicated to the sole purpose of staying alive to spite my dad, but that's obviously not enough to get me to not drink myself into oblivion so I need to find something more. I'm trying to stay in touch with my classmates now, but it feels weird now that I'm technically not, well, classmates with them anymore. At least not yet, not until my semester off is over and I can become a full on PhD student instead of getting the clinical doctorate (assuming that even works out).
However, I still went to that amusement park with them some time ago and it was a blast and I actually got to ride more roller coasters. Including one that is supposedly one of the most intense coasters ever built. Skyrush, it's called. Here's a POV video of it:
Hahaha, holy shit. The POV video doesn't do it justice. The first drop and the subsequent hills, especially that second one, legitimately launched me out of my seat so hard that I had bruises on my thighs. I rode it 3 times, though! The rest of my friends only rode it once except for one of them who rode it with me all 3 times. It felt like my soul left my body after the 3rd time. Feels good not to be scared of roller coasters anymore, though!
My mind is pretty scrambled lately, though. I did manage to drunkenly jot down like 4000 words one night of my VaporSky clopfic, but since then I can't get anything done. I'm gonna try again tonight, but sober.
So long story short, I'm still alive. Whee.
Glad you got to go ride some rides. My family was always reluctant to take us to stuff like that, so my first time was on my homeroom's senior trip at Hershey Park in Hershey, Pennsylvania. And, wow did I have no idea what I was missing!
I know you know we're all here for you. Be the Zuko to your father's Ozai, if I may borrow a reference from Last Airbender. Maybe find someone to be your Iroh, your mentor. One day, the world will see you as more noble than your father. If the only thing you live for is to see all his dirt dragged kicking and screaming into the light for all to see, then live for that.
Drinking may get you through this tough time, but take the advice of a [REDACTED] addict, you will eventually start associating your escape with the very pain you use it to escape from. It is a temporary fix to get you through a tough time. Be advised: there are legitimate medical reasons why quitting drinking cold turkey is not good for your health. When the time is right, plan ahead to ease yourself off.
From one suicide survivor to another, you can do this. From a depressed addict to a drinker, we can fight through it together. From one brony to another, we'll come out this thing the other side.
007Ben Could not have said that better. You can and will get through this. Someday I want to meet you in person, so keep your ass alive alright?
If you need someone to talk to, we're here for you!
Nice!
Damn, I need to try that roller-coaster thingy someday, looks awesome
As for the rest, 007Ben pretty much covered it already.
Good luck and keep in there, man