PICKLE-BURGER KUMQUAT! PICKLE-BURGER KUMQUAT! PICKLE-BURGER KUMQUAT! PICKLE-BURGER KUMQUAT! · 2:02pm Jul 7th, 2018
A harried day followed Twilight’s impromptu nap at her desk and now Twilight was showing signs of strain while she ate a hayburger loaded down with extra-extra-extra fried pickles and kumquat chutney, a taste sensation picked up from none other than Pinkie Pie. This was Twilight’s seventh such burger, and Spike had no doubt that she would eat the remaining five before there was even a hint of cold upon them.
“Fried Pickle-Burger Kumquat!” as Pinkie Pie was fond of saying.
“I spoke with Constance,” Twilight said, speaking with her mouth full in a most unprincessly manner. Kumquat chutney dribble down from the corners of her mouth and left dark stains upon her chin.
Spike tensed, wondering what Constance had said and if anything had been said about his chosen solution earlier. What had he been thinking? The east wing, a city administration repository, was enormous and it was an absolute mess at the moment because the summer records had been delivered, but not sorted and put away.
“I like Constance,” Twilight continued, her lips smacking while she chewed. “I was a little bit worried at first when Raven suggested her, because of her background in the guard. I really don’t want a militaristic environment in my castle. But Constance has really surprised me.”
“Yeah,” was Spike’s weak, faltering reply. “She’s great.”
“Spike…”
“Yeah, Twilight?” He felt the growing tension and feared whatever might have been said.
“She didn’t give me specifics, or say anything bad… but she did suggest that she’s concerned for you. I was told that you came up with a brilliant solution, she actually said ‘brilliant’ and this mare, she calls everything stupid, you know how she is… but she also said it was… harsh. She mentioned that I should have a chat with you to see how you’re holding up under pressure.”
“If we’re ever attacked again, she’ll be great at defending the students,” Spike said.
In response, Twilight crammed the remaining half of her hayburger into her mouth and began chewing all while unwrapping waxed paper wrapper from her next victim. Looking at her, Spike couldn’t help but think that Twilight looked a bit like some mutant squirrel, with her bulging cheeks and bright, alert eyes. Yes, she had a squirrelly look about her, Twilight did.
After swallowing, Twilight said, “Applejack would be proud of that misdirection, Spike.”
“You think so?” He glanced down at his own food, most of which was uneaten.
“Are you going to tell me what happened?” Then, before Spike could answer, Twilight assaulted her next victim and bit off almost a good third of it. It bled kumquat chutney and its fried pickle innards spilled out onto the waxed paper strategically placed on the desk below Twilight’s chin.
Spike knew that Twilight would spare none of them.
There is actually a point to these Twilight and Spike interactions, a recurring theme. I don't know if anybody has noticed, or picked up on the meaning of these, or their importance. Or why Twilight would take time out of her busy day to make sure she had a meal with Spike. But there is a deeper meaning and purpose.
no thanks ._.
4896514
So you don't like hay, no big deal.
4896522
What even is triple-extra fried, anyway? Do they just them through a deep fryer 4 times?
4896523
No, it is the amount of fried pickles. Three times the usual amount.
I read it as 4 times the normal amount of fried pickles, not 4 times the frying. I used to order extra pickles and hot peppers on my #9 steak sandwiches from d'Angelos, but I'd phrase it differently:
"Put on as much pickles and hot peppers as you can without getting fired."
Also, a correction:
Kumquat chutney dribbled down from the corners of her mouth and left dark stains upon her chin.
4896533
Just reading that gave me weird burps
4896536
how did you manage to highlight a single letter in your comment green by accident?
Idk if I'd be disturbed or amused by seeing Twilight annihilate a stack of hayburgers.
4896671
That was the correction, done on purpose. The color wheel on the edit bar is great for whenn you want to mark something to delete or something to add.
4896719
sorry, it just woke up my Background Pony paranoia