• Member Since 16th Oct, 2014
  • offline last seen Mar 14th, 2022

The Narwhal Assassin

Professional Shut-In, Armchair Orator, History Meme Fanatic, and Universal Annoyance. I argue about politics on the Internet to distract myself from the wreck that is my life.

The Narwhal Assassin Joined 16th Oct, 2014 · Offline

More Blog Posts350

  • 300 weeks
    D I O

    My name is Dio Brando. I'm 120 years old. My house is was at the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean, but is now in a nice mansion in Cairo, and I am not married. I work as the soon-to-be king of the world, and I get home every day by 8 AM at the latest. I don't smoke, but I eat a lot of bread. I'm in bed by 11 AM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm

    Read More

    1 comments · 342 views

  • 313 weeks
    Hey, Guys

    Not dead. Wish I was, but that’s besides the point :twilightsmile:
    So, guess who graduated high school. I was feeling euphoric, but now I’m very melancholy.

    But, no, this isn’t a grand return. I made the decision to leave, and I’m sticking to it. I just feel that you all deserved something of a check-in after such a momentous event.

    2 comments · 304 views

  • 332 weeks
    Johnny Test

    To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Johnny Test. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of genetics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer’s head. There’s also Dookie's cynical outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Nietzschean literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff;

    Read More

    9 comments · 690 views

  • 333 weeks
    HAPPY NEW YEAR

    HAPPY NEW YEAR

    3 comments · 366 views

  • 333 weeks
    Let's Revisit This

    https://www.fimfiction.net/blog/703868/i-dont-think-so
    Love: I guess I did find that
    Marriage: I'm 17, so...no
    Health: I've lost a lot of weight this year

    So...I guess it was accurate after all!

    2 comments · 335 views
Nov
5th
2017

Hey Guys, Look, I'm Ken Kaneki! · 9:05pm Nov 5th, 2017

ONE THOUSAND MINUS SEVEN IS WHAT?

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_______________

GET IT?!

Report The Narwhal Assassin · 230 views ·
Comments ( 10 )
TechWolf20
TechWolf20 #2 · Nov 5th, 2017 · · ·
Reply

i don't get it either

The Narwhal Assassin
The Narwhal Assassin #3 · Nov 5th, 2017 · · ·
Reply

4717994
4718022
In Tokyo Ghoul, after Kaneki goes crazy, they start calling him "the Centipede".
This is because, during his torture midway through the series, he had a centipede shoved in his ear. Also during his torture, he his torturer (Yamori) told him repeatedly to "count down from 1,000 in intervals of seven". Thus, the quote.

Phaedra
Phaedra #4 · Nov 5th, 2017 · · 1 ·
Reply

Tokyo Ghoul is gay.

The Narwhal Assassin
The Narwhal Assassin #9 · Nov 10th, 2017 · · ·
Reply

4721773
I didn't count the legs individually

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