Thank you, all. · 3:07am Dec 9th, 2016
Everyone has issues and we all have our demons, and people will know mine if they have followed me for as long as I have written.
I am an alcoholic and in my line of work, it is simply expected; I work way beyond that is needed and I work so far beyond that what is considered slavery; I, work for my girls and nothing more. But I have my vices and I have my demons.
Every day I get the: "THIS STORY IS DEAD" comment. On every story.
But the fact is the author is, by all sense and purpose, is dead.
It pains me to admit but yes; I have ideas! Brimming and constant and always there. Painful and agonizing.
I am not a good writer---I am not, that prolific beyond my work that sucks away my every being and makes into this pathetic shell that cannot escape the one vice that has plagued me from the get go.
This is it.
I have lost my very being; I cannot write the things I love because I have lost what it is I mean to write for.
I can't write anymore.
This isn't a pity-party nor is it an attempt for voices to sway me otherwise.
I've lost the battle. There is no escape to what it is I am.
A Father that works hard for his family; a Father that is nothing but a cog in a machine that has lost what it means to be creative.
Thank you all for the support; I really mean that... from my clopfics... FUCK. Can't believe I actually care about that... But I do.
I just can't physically or mentally bring myself to care.
Thank you, everyone.
Does this mean you're retiring from being an author? As in you won't be writing here ever again?
Sorry to hear that things turned out like that, but thank you for what you have given us and I wish you luck with your family and future endeavors.
I feel your pain brother, the ideas flow but the pressures of life and motivations pull you everywhich way. If you never write on this site again it would be a shame, but you do what you feel you must. And heres to hopeing that oneday youll return to finish what you started.
Just remember, lots of people on here, including me, think you are awesome, sometimes we are just not as vocal about it as the naysayers. Also gratuitous clop is not really my thing, but I certainly enjoyed DSM.
Hope everything gets better for you.
Do whatever you have to do. We'll support you no matter what.
Thank you for everything you've done
I am an alcoholic myself, in fact, I'm trying to shake a relapse from a substance I haven't touched in ten years.
Don't be down on yourself- we are our worst enemies.
Who says you're a bad writer?
Come on.. get up and get back in the game.
Alcoholism isn't a good excuse-
I know-
I AM an alcoholic, a drug addict, have ADD and OCD and VHS and PDQ and LOL and everything else.
PS- your stories look pretty well liked to me.
So start FUCKING writing again- you have no excuse.
You can't bullshit a bullshitter!
So you're dead? Time to drop you completely.
If this is what what I think it is then RIP.
Ech, and I just read through Corruption of the Sun!
Does this mean that you're actually dead now, for real? And not just updating very very slowly? If so, that's a huge shame. I was really looking forward to DSM2 being completed, and now Corruption too.
Well either way, I wish you all the best, as much as that is possible.
Dear god I dreaded the day I actually read this full blog post.. Megatron, you were my aboslute favorite writer on this site, I was looking forward to the ending of Wishing On a Star, DSM2, and many others I've been patiently waiting to update. I loved your stories and I was so proud when you enjoyed my first story. Your stories inspired me to write most of mine. Your style inspired an aspect of mine. I'm so glad I can still read yours, even if I may never see the ends to the ones I enjoyed. Thank you Megatron.
I hope you get help with your alcoholism, I wish your family the best, and I wish you the best too!
Forever a fan,
Pandora
Ah. Sorry to hear this.
There is help out there and nothing shameful about asking for it.
I come from a family tree corrupted by drugs, alcohol, and other addictions. Some pulled through and others didn't. I hope that wherever you are that you're still focusing on yourself and your girls. My dad is doing the same, now over a year clean from his meth addiction. I know this was posted a few years ago so all I can say is I hope you were granted the serenity....