Tantabus, Chapter 4 (Sunset) · 6:03am Jan 5th, 2016
Tantabus
3 - Sunset
September 23rd, 1:45 pm CST
Trans-dimensional portals, like any kind of door, are only designed to handle a maximum amount of stress. Your average human-built wooden doorframe can stand up to an average-sized earthquake, but not to a bomb. It can allow even the most overweight human to pass through, but not a full-sized bull elephant. The mirror portal can handle the magical kickback of allowing an exceptional unicorn or even an alicorn to pass through from the Crystal Empire to Canterlot High without rupturing, it can allow an immensely powerful artifact like the Element of Magic to pass through in the same direction, it can even allow both to pass through if the direction is from magic-poor Canterlot High to magic-rich Crystal Empire, but to do what I did—well, the results were inevitable:
The pedestal containing the portal from Equestria, the equine statue above it, and the Element of Magic—all of them were obliterated in an instant.
If this was a normal explosion of that magnitude... well, I wouldn’t be here to be writing this entry, it’s as simple as that. But this was a magical explosion, and the life-protecting Element of Magic was a part of that explosion, so as a result I emerged from that cataclysm with only a momentary loss of sight from the immense fireball, and no other injuries whatsoever. It helped that Fluttershy broke my fall.
If ever there was a moment in my life when quick thinking was necessary, it was now. The Fall Formal Crown was lost to me forever. The Element of Magic was obliterated. On the plus side, there was no way that Princess Celestia could pursue me, but on the negative side, I was now responsible for blowing up CHS’s school mascot.
My first instinct was to give up and surrender myself to the authorities. But then I remembered that Equestrian artifacts could not be destroyed without invoking at least 150% of the magic used to create them. The Element of Magic might appear to have been destroyed, but within a matter of days it would reconstitute itself, with even odds that it would materialize in the immediate vicinity of the strongest source of magic in the region, namely me. I merely had to survive that long and if it didn’t spontaneously appear in my hands, track down wherever the artifact did manage to reconstruct itself. Then I could carry out my plan exactly as before. If the portal was also an artifact, then it would also rebuild itself in its original spot, but probably not before the three days when it would close. As for me, once I had possession of the Element in the human world, I would be strong enough to breach the barriers between dimensions merely by thinking about it. By destroying the portal and creating enough chaos, I could achieve absolute power even easier than I had thought!
Now the value of my contingency plans asserted themselves to me. By doing nothing, I guaranteed that somebody else would take the blame for the loss of the crown. And as for the destruction of the statue...
“Fluttershy!” I cried out as I stood up and dragged her to her feet. “How could you destroy this supposed symbol of animal enslavement?”
The animal lover was too stunned to respond as I dragged her off to Vice-Principal Luna. All I had to do was utter the magic words “eco-terrorism” to get her suspended for a week. In fact, I think I did such a good job with my smear job that I may have convinced Fluttershy herself that she was guilty.
I am, after all, a mistress of manipulation.
I suppose I should feel bad about doing something so vile to as helpless an individual as Fluttershy, but you know what? I don’t, because she’ll be fine. In that week of suspension, Luna will fail to find any trace of conventional explosives on Fluttershy, and she will be brought back with an official apology. At some point the vice principal might suspect me. It was for that reason that I “accidentally” left my jacket behind, so that she would find no trace of conventional explosives on that, either.
Hm. I just occurred to me that I went through the portal without any clothing or saddlebags. By all rights, I should have arrived at Canterlot High without a stitch of clothing on in that case. It appears that the mirror must have some sort of “prudery filter” built in to give me a new set of clothes if I try to go through without anything that can be turned into clothing. I might want to analyze some other articles of my clothing in that case to see if they have any special qualities distinct from the ones I had the last time I used the portal.
There was a quickly summoned school assembly, wherein Principal Celestia told the students that not only could they go home early while the school was assessed for damage, but that the Fall Formal Crown and the Four-County Track Championship Cup had been stolen. I made sure to be loudly indignant that somebody would use a terrorist act to steal such a pair of valuable awards—it was the act of a coward, somebody utterly unworthy of the title of “Canterlot High student”. It was easy to let some of my own emotion in during that speech—depending on the timing, this could be the first Fall Formal since I entered Canterlot High where I wouldn’t be able to wear a crown. I held that crown and the title of Fall Princess in high esteem—I have always considered myself the Fall Princess from long before I ever heard of Canterlot High, and every time I put on that crown, it felt like I was back in Equestria again.
It was during the assembly when the police poured in and arrested Rainbow Dash, right in front of everybody. It was absolutely beautiful—the entire soccer team turned their backs on her in unison when she proclaimed her innocence. They had handcuffs and everything! Unfortunately, she didn’t fight back.
I tell you, diary, seeing that braggart humbled made me feel a lot better than I had when I had emerged from the mirror a scant hour earlier.
Afterwards, I gathered up Snips and Snails, told them that I was searching for a lump of uranium that had been unearthed by the explosion that the government would pay good money for, and gave them a couple of magic detectors that I had put together during my earlier research into human magic. The devices worked even better at detecting Equestrian magic, as evidenced by their strong reaction to myself. I told the pair that I had gotten contaminated, and they were to search the town for the largest concentration of “radiation” that was not me. That way I’ll be sure to find the Element—the last thing I want is for somebody to mess with it that has no idea what it is.
So far my search has been fruitless, but at least it afforded me the time to eat and write these entries. Therefore, unless I get lucky, so ends my diary entries for today.
Oh, and the “pathetic line” I gave Princess Celestia when she cornered me? “Why didn’t I get a dragon assistant?”
Stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
Oh, jeez, poor Fluttershy
Why, again, is this not a full story?
Sunset may not feel bad for her victims, but I certainly do. Dash in tears, not even struggling... it breaks my heart just to picture it.
Also, there's the whole thing with an Element of Harmony trapped in another universe prior to the plundervine incident. That could end very, very badly. And given the premise of this story, it likely will.
Huh...I would think Sunset would consider Rarity a bigger threat to her title of Fall Princess... why did she get Dash in trouble with the whole gambling scam??