Obs' OC Slamjam: Round 2 -- Welp, That Was Short Lived · 2:04am Jun 13th, 2015
Just a little short thing here, mostly me just wanting to get it out. So, as some of you know, I was excited being a part of this project. Not only excited, but confident in myself, at least up to a point. And maybe I was overly confident. Wouldn't be the first time, but I didn't think I was being unreasonable.
But now that I've gotten to see my opponent's work, I realize: I done messed up. Just utterly. I'm going to lose, and--this idea may change as time goes by and I see other input get put in here--I don't think I should have. I really feel I had the ability to pull this win off. Now, was the next round going to be a challenge? Oh yeah. I had no doubts that would test me. But I think I should've had this one a bit more down pat than I do.
I'm just disappointed in myself, really. And honestly, though I know it's childish and I hate it, I'm feeling stupid bummed about it. There's a week of voting to go, everybody will see things differently. We're barely into, so who knows.
I dunno. Like, I've had things that did not go over as I wanted. I've had things even fail. But y'know, I usually still feel like I did my best in the circumstances given. I never just had that sense that, "You know you can do better than this." Sometimes I get that though I probably could do better, I still reached a certain level of satisfaction and quality. But here? I just dropped the ball. I did not reach the goal I set for myself, and it is no one's fault but my own.
I'm just bummed. I had an idea, I think it was a good idea, and I executed it stupid poorly. So, yeah, just disappointed with myself, I guess. I'm taking the night off, maybe a couple nights off.
Am I just being stupid? Like, as I said, I feel like I've come to challenges on this site, failed, and yet not felt this bummed out about it before. I saw where I needed to improve, and I learned. I celebrated what I did achieve. And I've got that here, too. I dunno, it's weird. Why am I so disappointed with myself? I'm, like, seriously wondering and concerned. Concerned if I'm being conceited and blinding myself to my own limitations. I really try to avoid that, but human is, y'know.
I dunno... Go check out Round Two of the Slamjam, there is undoubtedly quality work there well worth your attention. I'm going to step away from it for a day or two, not just to kind of rethink my attitude here, but also a way to make up for my poor performance. See you all, and best of luck to you in whatever you've got going on.
Looks like it's still a pretty even fight for you. You still got a chance to take it. And if not, at least you'll learn what shortcomings you'll have to deal with