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Grey Hat Commentary: Interlude #2 · 8:16pm Apr 1st, 2015

This entry contains spoilers for Grey Hat. Be warned...



There is a disturbing lack of dick jokes in this chapter.

Two things made this chapter what it is. The first is I had to at least touch on the coming arrival of the ponies themselves. The second is a little something that leads you to an extra 2k-3k words of material I had crafted just for this chapter.

When I first started this chapter, the hidden content was never part of the plan at all. As time progressed and the deadline approached, I felt like I had a little more to offer. It soon suffered from scale creep, and what was originally a brief message to invoke an “oh shit” response grew into something with a life of its own... providing anybody can decode the riddle.

I can be anything, but alone I am nothing.
I can humble kings, but I am not man.
I can be a sight, but I cannot see.
I can be a sound, but I cannot hear.
I can be a word, but I cannot speak.
What am I?

If the riddle is the key, finding out how to use it is the lock. Originally I thought that the only difficulty would be decoding the riddle, only to find out (it’s been 2 days since the chapter published since I drafted this) that no one can find the lock. I feel a little sheepish. Well, I have no intention of making it easier. Revealing that the riddle actually has a purpose is as far as I’ll go.

The second was a little more varied. There are a lot more people in the chat this time. I am throwing ponies under the definition for people, for those wondering. ZomZom is still cantankerous, Synergy is opening up to the idea of ponies coming into human populations, Sid is childish and rash, Moma Valentine is open but keeping her opinion neutral on the matter, etcetera. The one thing I wanted when I did interludes was to keep opinions different. People liked some things, and some people hated those things. It’s one of the laws of the internet, I think. It should be if it isn’t; you can’t satisfy everyone.

There really isn’t much concerning the “main” story here other than Fluttershy’s and AJ’s arrival, and the brief speculation concerning why they were sent to that particular location. Again, all in due time. This interlude served, at least at the time it was originally drafted and written, more of my way of tapping into the other storylines. At the time of this commentary, there are currently two different stories going on: Gray Hat and Nightmare’s Dream. There were originally three more: one staring Pinkie, one staring Rainbow Dash and Spike, and one staring Rarity (I believe that one is still going to get published with time). The influx of racing information near the beginning was my nod towards that story, which was cancelled out of necessity by the author. The Pinkie story was also dropped fairly early on. Despite a fair bit of this chapter relying on information that was no longer valid, I think it still held up rather well.

By now you can probably grasp the personalities of the people. ZomZom is the token callous duchebag despite being a moderator, but showed a bit of a softer side here now that his temper has calmed. Valentine, mentioned in the first interlude, acts with Rarity’s mannerisms and is almost a den mother. Captain Chaos is pragmatic and strict, but still has his own sense of humor. Adam and Eve are jokesters and new guys (girls?). It is strangely fascinating for me to both read and write this. I know who everyone is. Not even shirotora, the author of Nightmare’s Dream, knows who these people are. I can see the discrepancies in their actions and words. Suppose you met ZomZom in chat in the first interlude, but in real life during the second. He’s still grumpy, but is way more mellow now. It’s almost my own personal character study in psychology with the Proteus Effect going on. You’d be shocked on what you might learn about these people over the course of the story.

That’s somewhat why I find writing this interlude’s so fun: there’s really isn’t any story to be had. It’s rather ironic in a sense; I was terrible and still kinda am at writing dialog. This forum jockey method is just thoughts on the page where rampant speculation and nerdgasms rule.

The only real thing that made me nervous during the production and scripting phase was the sheer volume of people hanging around in the chat. During the first interlude, I deliberately kept the number of people at a minimum in order to let people adapt to what was happening. Now there’s over a dozen. LaLiLuLeLo, the shadow of many secrets. Blackjack has some experience with weaponry, as does ZomZom. Sid the Kid and Ozymandias at least act younger than the mainliners. We even get to see another newcomer VolTecha come in. That’s a lot of people, and the script format best transcribes what I wanted despite script formatting being frowned upon for many valid reasons. It’s a risk I’ll take.

Well, not much to talk about this time around. I’ll see you next time.

Report Journeyman · 174 views · Story: Grey Hat · #Commentary #Grey Hat
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Comments ( 2 )

The Pinkie story was also dropped fairly early on.

Pinkie Pie cannot be created or destroyed, only changed :pinkiecrazy::raritywink:

Don't be givin' me lip, boy.

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