Have Some More Pie - Pinkie's Maternal Uncles and Aunts · 8:13pm Nov 16th, 2014
Introduction:
Here are four more proposed relatives of Pinkie Pie: the two brothers and two sisters of her mother Cloudy Quartz Pie. You will note that Goldie and Jasper's five children were spaced out over twenty years and were born when Goldie was between 30 and 50. This pattern is not entirely uncommon for Earth Pony mares, who tend to be long-lived; and healthy and fertile for most of those long lives. Goldie deliberately spaced out her children in this fashion, because she believed that having too many foals in quick succession was riskier than having a couple of them when she was middle-aged. The topic is debatable: though, as a midwife and a mother, Goldie would count as a double expert. Jasper always mostly went along with whatever Goldie wanted.
I. Chert ("Pie Chart") Pie (1449-): The first child and eldest son of Golden ("Goldie") Pie (1419-) and Jasper Quartz (1419-1493), hence the elder uncle of Pinkie Pie. Chert Pie is a big strong stallion, with a gray coat and straight golden hair, with pale yellow eyes. His Cutie Mark is a colorful pie chart. His face is quite handsome and his expression alert and intelligent. He's 55 as of the end of Season Four.
He came precisely on time, demonstrating his virtue of punctuality, and resulting in his being a hospital birth. From an early age, he showed a mathematical aptitude obviously inherited from his maternal grandparents, Surprise the Nth Pie (1387-1489) and Reliable Oaktree (1375-1488), and was very close to both of them. He was also very used to responsibility, as he was seven years older than the next-born, Cloudy Quartz Pie (1456-), and hence spent most of his youth (especially in summer) babysitting his four younger siblings. He attended Canterlot High School 1463-1467 and Pranceton University 1467-1473, gaining a BA in Accounting at 21 and an MBA at 23. He seemed set for a boring but lucrative career as a business accountant and ultimate executive in a large firm.
Instead, in 1473 he ran off to join a caravan of itinerant Earth Ponies. He sought the adventure and excitement he had been denied during his highly-responsible colt-hood and studious young stallionhood. The open road, a song in his heart and loyal companions on every side ...
... When the degree of his mathematical and accounting skills came to the attention of the caravan leaders, he wound up as their accountant. He demonstrated a serious aptitude for practical business administration, and helped them figure out ideal routes through various solutions of the Traveling Salespony Problem that made the caravan very, very rich. He also developed his ability to make friends.
When he finally departed the caravan in 1477 to take up a more normal career, he had made the caravan quite rich and set them up with business contacts all around the land so that they would continue to prosper. He knew he always had a place with the caravan, if he wanted it. Instead, he accepted an offer to work as an accountant for a large Manehattan-based drayage firm. In 1481 he coordinated their expansion into steamships. In 1485 he accepted a position with the Morgan Manehattan Bank, working as an international Account Executive. Today he is their Chief Financial Officer.
Of course, he is rarely seen in South-Dunnich these days, since he is responsible for coordinating the finances of a major corporation. However, he does stop by for family reunions. His kinship becomes important later on, as he helps his nieces by Cloudy found The Pie Sisters Inc, the company which operates the interplanetary Gates Claire opens. By the 1530's, Pie Chart's own share of The Pie Sisters Inc. has made him even wealthier than before.
Pie Chart is a charismatic, polite and personable Pony who is good at making friends: he has a dozen or so really good ones in all walks of life, and thousands of friendly acquaintances of all sorts. This is a manifestation of the high social intelligence and ability to recognize numerous individuals which Pinkie Pie also displays; it's a family trait. However, he does not seem to have much if any love life.
However, Pie Chart has a great romantic secret. The truth is that he's been in love since 1473 with Trail Dancer (1451-), a mare of the caravans, who returns his affections but is too attached to the itinerant life to be willing to settle down with Pie Chart. They have been lovers, and mutually-faithful ones, for many decades. She's now a leader of a caravan, and they have had five children together. Dancer refuses to marry him unless he rejoins the caravans, but she also refuses to marry anypony else. And so matters stand. He takes regular short vacations to visit with her; sometimes he visits with the Pies.
The exact nature of their love is kept secret from both worlds. It would be considered scandalous if it was known that the responsible, sober Pie Chart is the lover of an itinerant caravan mistress, so he pretends to be amusing himself in more casual ways on his vacations. And she would lose status in her own society if they knew that her only lover was a very conventional businesscolt; so she pretends that he is but one of her many lovers. Amazingly, this has worked out fairly well for both of them: he has more time for his large-scale work, while his rather different approach to management does not challenge her leadership of the caravan -- they might quarrel more if they were full-time spouses.
The Pies at the Rock Farm know him only distantly. His mother Goldie wishes he'd come by more often; she loves him but has come to realize that he is strange in many of the same ways as was her own mother Surprise the Nth. Goldie and Jasper were two of the very few third parties to know about his love life; among other things, Chert felt that they deserved to be aware that they had five grand-children with him. She has met her grand-children on more than one occasion. Chert's brothers and sisters don't know his secret.
Cloudy likes her elder brother Chert and misses him sometimes. He helped put Maud through school, an action for which both Cloudy and Maud are grateful. Pie Chart knows of Claire's existence and some aspects of her nature, and has realized that some day she might be useful in the transportation business.
Chert is 55 as of the end of Season Four; Dancer is 53, and their five children are 25, 19, 14, 8 and 6 respectively.
II. Foidolite ("Pie Fighter") Pie (1459-1493): The third child and second daughter of Goldie and Jasper, she had a dappled gray, white and black coat and straight grayish-purple mane, worn short or in a crest, and dark gray eyes. She was compact but extremely muscular. Her muzzle was slightly askew from an old injury, and she had claw marks on her left side. Her Cutie Mark was of a brown-crusted pie with speed lines indicating that it was being thrown. Her Talent is combat, and specifically accurate and rapid slinging and throwing.
Foidolite came slightly premature and with little warning, resulting in Goldie being unable to make it to a hospital or bring in a midwife, in a rapid yet painful birth. She was a fierce, tomboyish filly who stood up for herself and her kin on every occasion -- unlike most of the (brave but peaceful) Pies, she actually liked to fight. Unlike most of the Pies, she had no interest whatsoever in becoming a Friend of Paradise, even though she knew that the Paradise Entity was real, because the Entity seemed too wussy for her to worship.
Pie Fighter was adept in combat, being a brawler, an accurate thrower, and a mistress of the tail-sling -- she had very fine control over her tail, an ability shared by her niece Pinkie . Fighter had a bad temper, but was also very loyal to those for whom she cared. When Pinkie was a child she knew her aunt Fighter fairly well, and liked her despite her tendency toward explosive, violent rage.
From the time Foidolite was three years old, in 1462, she was friends with Rough Neck (1459-), a colt her own age. Foidolite and Rough Neck had a stormy friendship, often quarreling and even physically fighting. When they were 17, in 1476, she saved Rough Neck's life, and the two realized that they were in love with one another. They had frequent fights and occasional breakups, followed by passionate reconciliations.
At age 20, in 1479, they were wed. They settled down somewhat in marriage, though they still fought. Their four children were all conceived after particularly epic disagreements, being born in 1480 (eldest daughter), 1482 ( only son), 1485 (second daughter) and 1488 (third daughter). They both loved their mother and found her occasionally frightening: Rough Neck mellowed out a lot as an adult, but Pie Fighter never did.
She was 34 years old in 1493, when the Shadowdrake attacked South-Dunnich. At the time she was in the field with her husband and two middle children. When the creature menaced her second daughter, Rough Neck and their son fought back. Her son was killed, and Rough Neck badly wounded; Pie Fight gave her life diverting the Dragon's attention away from her husband and daughter. The Shadowdrake then realized that it was attacking the wrong farm, and flew on to the main Pie Rock Farm in search of its quarry, Pinkie.
Rough Neck was crippled, and his three surviving children -- the first cousins of the Pie Sisters -- were not very close with them thereafter, blaming Goldie and Cloudy's religion for the deaths of their mother and brother. By 1496, Rough Neck had made a partial recovery from his injuries, but was still unable to do heavy physical labor, the only work he'd ever known. Amazingly, the rather irascible, half-crippled and unemployed stallion won the love of a mare who lived in nearby Nickerlite, Gin ("Ginnie") Fizz (1453-), a bartender who found that he was still strong (and aggressive) enough to work as a bouncer; he married her in 1503 and that same year had a daughter by her. Gin Fizz also loved Rough Neck's three daughters, and the whole family moved to Nickerlite in 1503 and fell even further out of touch with the Pies of the Pie Rock Farm, though they nod at each other when the Rock Farm Pies come into Nickerlite to buy supplies.
By the end of Season Four, Foidolite has been dead 11 years, her widower Rough Neck is 45 years old, his second wife Gin Fizz is 51, Rough Neck's three surviving children by Foidolite are now 24. 19 and 16 respectively.
III. Lemon Quartz (1465): The fourth child and second son of Goldie and Jasper, Lemon Quartz is a small wiry lemon-coated Pony with dark green hair and eyes. His cutie mark is a shard of lemon quartz shaped like a primitive knife. He often wears a khaki hat and wears a brown-mottled tan camoflague jacket with harness and bags to carry camping equipment.
After Fighter's birth, Goldie was careful to take a trip to nearby Ponyville, where Ponyville General Hospital had recently opened, to ensure that her next foal would not be born at home and without even a midwife in attendance. (Goldie is a midwife, but it is unwise for a midwife to be the only Pony in attendance at her own chidlbeds). Goldie went into labor on the train, but managed to make it to the hospital in time for the actual birth.
Naturally adventurous, Lemon early showed an interest in the wilderness and was fascinated by survival gear. At age 10, in 1475, he made friends with a similarly-inclined 9-year-old unicorn filly, Opal ("Oh") Shiny (1466-), who was fascinated by exploration and prospecting. At 14 they fell in love and when he was 16 and she 15 (in early 1481) were married, rather young and by necessity. They have had three surviving foals: after a stillbirth in late 1481, they had a son in 1483, a daughter in 1487 and a son in 1492. Lemon and Oh have an extremely happy marriage, and are still very much in love.
Together they run Shiny Gear, a small trading post in Nickerlite which specializes in camping equipment. They make periodic expeditions into the White Tail Hills, sometimes bringing back valuable objects which they sell through their various connections. Sometimes they discover some very strange things, especially in places where the hills are oddly regular and peculiar lights are seen at certain times of the year. Occasionally, they venture into more dangerous areas, such as the Everfree. They enjoy their lives together, though one wonders how they've both lived so long.
Lemon is 39 and Oh 38 as of the end of Season Four; their children are 21, 17 and 12 respectively.
IV. Sugar Pie (1469-): She is the youngest child and daughter of Goldie and Jasper. She was conveniently born at Ponyville General Hospital with no complications and relatively little pain. This is characteristic of her: Sugar Pie has always been a sweet and considerate Pony.
Sugar has a pie-crust brown coat, and golden hair and eyes like her mother's. Her cutie mark is an open bag of sugar. Her talent is baking sweet goods. She is plump, pretty, and very feminine: she always wears green ribbons and bows, usually applies at least a little makeup and has a nice collection of fancy dresses for festivals. Her voice is sweet, and she is generally cheerful and almost unfailingly polite. She very much loves her family, both immediate and extended.
Unfortunately for Sugar, she is emotionally-pliable and not very bright -- she is by far the least intelligent of Goldie's generally-brainy brood. During most of her life she has been something of a sucker, tending to make excuses for false friends and lovers who have exploited her. Hence, her social life has not always been entirely happy. Over time, she learned to be more suspicious of mistreatment by others, and better at standing up for herself.
Sugar Pie moved to Nickerlite at age 25, in 1494, and with a loan from her eldest brother Pie Chart bought a small house and went into business for herself baking cakes and making pies for the community. The business barely survived, doing so only due to her skill, as Nickerlite is a small town which (unlike Ponyville) does not get a signficant festival trade from Canterlot, but instead must rely on custom from the surrounding villages, such as South-Dunnich.
In 1498, aged 29 she met and was ardently courted by Marc Trouver (1461-), a Pegasus archaeologist from Neigh Orleans who was investigating some of the curious hills of the White Tails, and had hired her brother Lemon as a guide. After less than a year's courtship, she married in 1499, now aged 30. In 1502 they had her first foal, a son. In late 1504, she is extremely pregnant and will soon have another foal. The marriage is working out well -- despite their hasty courtship, they are very emotionally compatible, and mutually in love.
As of the end of Season Four, Sugar Pie is 35; Marc is 43, and their son is 2 years old.
Addendum
Opinions regarding these characters are greatly welcome.
Heh. I like making characters like this too. :-)
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It's taken me a while because I don't want to mess up the uncles and aunts of someone as important as Pinkie Pie; also, they pretty much have to have some strangeness (being Pinkie's kin) but I didn't want to make them all a family of super-powered weirdos. Having Maud (super-strong meta-pony utterly obsessed by field geology) and Claire (Lovecraftian giant invisible eight-headed pony who opens Gates and marries five Byakhee) as Pinkie's full sisters; Goldie (scientist-sorceror trained at Miskatrottic) as her grandmother, Surprise the Nth (arguably mad mathematician) as her great-grandmother, and Florinda (a Fluffy Pony) as her great-great-grandmother: that struck me as enough High Weirdness for any one family. Instead, I made her uncles and aunts only slightly weird -- Pie Chart (an elder uncle who ran off to the gypsies, became a gypsy accountant and then moved to the corporate world while having five illegitimate foals with his True Love gypsy marefriend), Pie Fighter (a combative tomboy who died fighting a full-grown and demonically-possessed Dragon, when Fighter was armed only with a sling); Lemon (a Nature Lover who marries a Treasure Hunter) and Sugar (a Nice Girl Extreme Doormat who eventually finds love with an Adventurer Archaeologist) -- they're downright normal compared to the three elder Pie Sisters and their matrilineal ancestors!
Just a couple of points for clarification...
What, all three of them are Lemon? Do they take turns, or..? ;p
Is that supposed to be pie-crust? Or is pie-coat a term I'm just unfamiliar with? (I am more than willing to believe that I don't know all the terms for describing horse coats, especially technicolor ones)
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Thank you for spotting those typos. I fixed them.