Eternal Part 1 · 4:15pm Jun 7th, 2012

Okay, so now that the first part of Eternal is finished, I thought it'd be a good idea to give some notes and commentary on whats happened so far. Here's a song to go along with everything if your intrested

Lets start with how I name the chapters. While each chapters name is directly reflected in the chapter, there is a larger meaning behind them. Voices, Memories, Hearts, and Moments are all things that make up a sapient life. Each chapter is plural because they represent both Spike and Rarity.

Voices: thoughts strong enough to be vocalized.

Your voice is what you use to share your feelings, feelings that others remember even when your gone. This chapter unique style comes from a combo of my own personal experience and a episode of House where the patient can't move, but we spend the whole episode listening to his thoughts. 500 words minuscule really but had I gone through the normal style of writing, I easily could of made 2000+. Spike's internal reaction to hearing Rarity's voice is huge here, he's screaming in his head basically. Her terrified voice pulls out these feeling of anger, loathing, and fear in him. He pushes his body past what should be his limits just to respond to her, to comfort her. That one moment of vocalization where Spike manages to say her name takes everything out of him, but he does it just to comfort her, to let her know it's going to be okay.

Memories: our pasts that make us who we are.

"What is a man but a sum of his memories." Yea an Assassin's Creed quote cheap shot I know but still. Here we have Rarity reminiscing about what led to Spike's current condition, and she even reflects on why she's in love with Spike. This chapter had two main purposes 1) to reveal what happened to Spike and 2) to show that Rarity loved Spike long before the accident or before his now more impressive physical state. This chapter has so many close cliches; however, I didn't actually use any. Rarity telling Spike how she feels at his birthday party is a cute idea and I love how its done in some fics, particularly For the Ones We Love, but it not very personal or intimate in all honesty, which is why Rarity changes her mind. Having a character fall for someone after they save their life or get seriously injured, again cliche, however I was very clear that Rarity already loved Spike and the accident was just another memory, albeit a rather traumatic one. Spike likes confessing as he's about to die don't blame me blame the show writers.

Hearts: where our feelings our generated from, not literally but figuratively.

This chapter was so full of fluff, but I digress. Spike has a lot of internal turmoil here, he's afraid that Rarity feels guilty and he's afraid that she's going to have this fake love for him because of her guilt or admiration for what he did. Louis Lane Syndrome when someone falls in love with someone else because of what they did, not who they are. He loves Rarity for who she is, and he wants her to love him for who he is, nothing more, nothing less. Twilight is here to show him exactly how much Rarity cares for him by conveying the events of the last five days. She works to help him over his fear of losing Rarity to her guilt. Spike isn't really sold on the idea though and works against Twilight's help. Spike never stops caring for Rarity though, constantly comforting her while shes asleep. Rarity is woken up and she cries, driving another knife through Spike's heart. Then she does something truly amazing, she manages to end all of Spike's fear with a kiss and a confession. Another cliche I hate promise me you'll never do that again?, I promise. No, fuck that, it's a empty promise we all know he'd do it again and I wasn't having him lie just to make her happy. The whole point of the chapter is that they're speaking from their hearts and that means honestly, no facade or lies, just the truth. Even the end with Twilight was all about how he really felt.

Moments: the events that make up a life.

This chapter skips around to the important moments surrounding Spikes first day out of the hospital but more importantly their first date. I set Rarity and the readers up on this one. Everyone works in the background to help Spike set up this magical date for the two of them. Even though it's not really shown this is another moment where Twilight really pulls through for her brother and her best friend. She does a ton of work, coaxes information from Rarity, and manages to act as if nothing is up through all of it. The chapter focuses on strengthen the bond Rarity and Spike now openly share. She works to end some of his guilt and she's by his side every step of the way for his recovery. The girls have their first chance to really see Spike at 100% and talk about the new couple. Every man should learn how to waltz. Seriously, if you want to impress a girl, a little ballroom dancing goes a long way. The flight is something no one ever seems to do, I have no idea why. This is one of my favorite moments in the chapter. Spike carries Rarity into this beautiful night sky, allowing her to enjoy the feeling of flight again and to enjoy this breath taking sight that is usually limited to Pegasi. Finally, we actually get to the date and its romantic, they cuddle, and Rarity leads Spike upstairs. This chapter had a lot of fluff to.

Moments (continued)

Honestly all I have to say about this is fluffy, vanilla sex. It's romantic and simple, for the most part. 8 people disliked it, I guess, no idea how really, it's extremely vanilla not like you can really disturb people with it.

And so ends the first part of Eternal. Things are going to start picking up excitement wise in the second part, lots of twist and turns.

Feel free to comment and ask any questions you might have about the first part of Eternal here.

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