• Member Since 26th Feb, 2012
  • offline last seen Jan 29th, 2020

Peroth E

Avatar is of Ambar, a character from the comic Las Lindas by Challodillo.

More Blog Posts20

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Hmm... · 1:39am May 26th, 2012

The knife fell, again and again, droplets flying through the air and staining the table, marring the faces of the many watchers as the jester did his work.

From the seats at the table down low to the guardrails of the balconies up high, ponies stared, stunned, horrified, watching the carnage below as the wood of the table splintered under the attack.

Teeth as sharp as razors gnashed and chewed, red juices pouring down the demented stallion’s throat while again and again, the knife fell.

This was an awful idea. Balla had known this from the very beginning since he’d suggested it, but she didn’t know why she had been so hasty to allow him. She knew things would go south the instant the server appeared, tweaking his mustache and speaking with that accent of his.

She could have stopped this.

Balla stared at her companion with a heavy sense of dread. She could still see it when the knife first fell, the look of shock and terror on the server’s face as Cloppin struck. She remembered watching the juices bubble and pour from the open cut, a wine bottle spilling open by a barely aimed dagger meant to join its twin, side-by-side.

Pieces still spattered her face. She could feel something hit her chin, run down her neck, drip onto the table. She could see from the other patrons that her grievous error in judgment had just cost them a moment of sanity.

Cloppin went unheeded. The look of terror was still written across the poor waiter’s face, even as the knife fell, again and again.

The whole restaurant could only stare. No other response could quite match the display, not since everybody’s scream had died in their throat.

Balla stared into the waiter’s wide eyes, her one eye full of apology as she silently wished he would be the last of Cloppin’s casualties.

The jester never looked up as he ate, never bothering nor caring to take a look at the many witnesses to his carnage. He was at peace. He had not had a meal like this in ages, and his stomach had been growling for him to fill it with its most favored treat. A sacrifice had to be made, but the restaurant could stand to have one less server among its ranks if it meant he could be full and happy.

Yes… what was one server to a happy Cloppin?

Balla risked glancing to the waiter’s red-stained face, and whispered the most sincere of apologies…

… and the waiter simply backed away slowly, moving rigidly to go clean his face of the wine stain and turn in his resignation form to the head chef.

After all, he’d seen things. He’d seen lions devouring gazelles, bears pulling apart fish, dragons snapping up whole sheep, yet he had never seen Cloppin eat a spinach quiche.

Report Peroth E · 549 views ·
Comments ( 16 )

My god...

Now, the question returns.

Are you going to start writing Growing Pains again?

135610 Is that Luna in a top hat?

Nope. That is Luna in a top hat, and a monocle.

... Watching Cloppin eat a spinach quiche. :unsuresweetie:

135618 You can have this :heart:

Awesome, I'll put it with the rest of my collection of p̶r̶e̶s̶e̶r̶v̶e̶d̶ ̶h̶u̶̶̶̶m̶̶̶̶̶̶̶̶a̶n̶ ̶h̶e̶a̶r̶t̶s cartoony fake hearts. :pinkiehappy:

my word....

Cloppin is evilest pony


I really wanna see the chapter where pinkie pie finally kills that mother F-cker :ajsmug:

... On one hand, I am in support of this. On the other... I WANT THAT FUCKER TO DIE LIKE THE BITCH HE IS!!! :pinkiecrazy:

135794 I may have to leave if those rape-eyes persist...

Seriously though, I've been waiting forever for more Growing Pains. Is this a sign that a new chapter is coming soon? pleaseohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease say yes...:fluttershyouch:

135802 No. It means I'm going to get to writing it again soon. But I have summer vacation.... so....

Just don't leave us loyal fans hanging. Also, what's the status of the Rarity playing Dark Souls fic? I happen to have a friend who is a massive Rarity fanboy AND a Dark Souls fanatic. If that existed he would die many times over. It would be hilarious :pinkiehappy:

135873 At the moment? In bare-bones. I'm having difficulties getting started for a few reasons:

- I don't know how I want to pace it. Obviously I want to do it with some quickness but I'm tempted to describe how it would look to somebody playing the game for the first time in full first-person experience.

- I'm having difficulties writing Rarity for it. At first I was thinking knight in shining armor sort of character, since it would sort of fit her romantic nature, but as meticulous as she is I'm thinking she would look deep into just how to handle her stats, armor, and weaponry yet try to stay cosmetic.

- I'm not sure how to write her walking through the game without describing the game. I want to make it personalized for her rather than a walkthrough and where to go.

- I'm also getting distracted with another interesting project, one starring Pinkie getting knocked on the head and waking up in a crazy land full of crazy ponies and monsters. That one is a little more smooth, but, meh, Growing Pains calls.

More Growing Pains! I command thee!! Now, when Twi and Dashie can stop worrying about the world falling to pieces around them and a crazy kingdom trying to kill them and a war on Equestria, they had better look into a relationship. :twilightsmile::heart::rainbowdetermined2: forever!

PINKIE DESERVES TO KILL THAT MOTHERF:yay:ING SON OF A B:yay:H!! Slowly, very slowly. :pinkiecrazy:

Why can't I favorite this? :raritycry:

First Composure now Growing Pains... :pinkiegasp: *has died and gone to heaven* :pinkiehappy:

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