"My Harshwhinnial": Greater-than colon-D version · 1:59am Jun 1st, 2013
GUYS … GUYS
FIRE UP THE OUTRAGE MACHINES
Gl1m0: Now, I’ve learned never to judge a book by its cover, but in this line of work it’s almost impossible to have good impressions in the first place. In this case, not when the cover art pony looks like some kind of reject from Generation 3…
Screwball: Why does it even have UPVOTES?
SOMEONE IS MOCKING ME ON THE INTERNET
…
wait
and icy purple eyes like limpid sweaters
Scootaloo: So icy, he couldn’t even move them around.
Gl1m0: And as a result, he is forever doomed to look like a Hasbro figurine.
This is …
Chapetr 2:
Gl1m0: “The Retrun of the Mipselld Wrods.”
Wait. I recognize this format!
Ohmigosh! TheAuthorGl1m0 has written an (amusing and unsolicited) MiSTing of "My Harshwhinnial"!
"oH. mY. bUCKING. aLICORN." I screamed.
Gl1m0: If you listen closely, you can almost hear the mournful cries of a heavily-abused caps lock key, begging for a kind soul to put it out of its misery.
Screwball: I’d be feelin’ for that Shift key, too.
Do you have any idea how cathartic it is to be able to reread that story with an audience suffering right alongside you?
I almost feel bad for putting Gl1m0 (who runs the MLP MST site, home of many other satirical commentaries) through this torture, but now that he's gotten started I'm really curious to see what the meltdown is going to be like when his narrators reach the spiraling madness that is Chapter 12.
In the meantime, go read Part 1 of the MiSTing (covering Chapters 1-6). I'd love to say that I've got a new story on the way that will wash the taste of MyHW clean out of your mouth afterward, but the next thing on my plate (Social Lubricant) is an entirely different kind of wrong, so I'm not sure how much it would help.
If you want more Horizony goodness in the meantime (as opposed to the MiSTing's ameliorated badness), you can go read darf's short story Cumuliform (1700 words), and then scroll down to the second comment for my 1100-word epilogue. I haven't been finding a lot of uninterrupted time to really dig into pony writing/editing lately, but I was able to sneak that one off during a lull at work.
(Finally: this might not be to everyone's taste — it's written in a direct homage of James Joyce — but Darf's also done some really deep stuff lately that won't get enough views.)
Sadly, as I am not capable of this sort of writing, I will never know the honor of having my work MSTed. Hats off to you, good sir.
All publicity is good publicity?
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For My Harshwhinnial, any publicity is probably better than it deserves.
(Let us be clear, if the post wasn't: I have no problems with someone pointing and laughing at the badness of a story that was deliberately written to be hilariously bad. It's possible there may have been some hyperbole involved in my initial feigned outrage.)
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You say that about your writing like it's a bad thing.
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Oops, forgot to add a
.
(And, thanks.)
I suppose I should be relieved, then... That strange vision I had about being hung from the second-story window by my ankle and having tomatoes thrown at me hasn't come to pass yet. Welp, in that case, I guess I better get crackin' on the second half of the riff now. Oh man, this is gonna hurt.
(Oh, and thanks for, um, "taking it so well"! I'll let ya know when I finish it; shouldn't take too much longer, hopefully.)