Filk is Magic, vol 2 · 6:37pm Feb 14th, 2013
Today, a triple-shot of silly quickies. Instead of ponifying an existing song, these all turn pony songs into a paean to heavy drinking. Some are a bit more refined than others - or perhaps you're just that much more inebriated by the time you get to them.
With no further ado...
What a Dizzying Pace, featuring Fluttershy
What is this place, filled with intoxication?
Drink after drink, 'til I forget my station?
Bourbon and Scotch and some gin in my tummy...
Cinnamon schnapps and then finish with RUMMMMYYY....
RUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMYYYYYY
Oh, what a dizzying pace.
I just fell straight down and landed on my face.
If I d known that booze had so much to give,
I'd stop being sober, drunk's how I'd live.
Yes, I'd.
Drink.
Ev.
Ry.
THIIIING!
Tipple ‘til You’re Toasty, featuring Pinkie Pie
When I was a little filly
And my folks were out of town
I'd pick the lock on the cabinet
And take the bottles down
I'd pour myself a double
Smile as it passed my jaw
'cos Granny Pie said beer wasn't the way
To binge my drinks at all
She said, "Pinkie, pour yourself a highball
Skip the crummy beers
You'll feel like you're immortal
Just sip and make pain disappear."
Glug, glug, glug!
Soooo...
Tipple 'til you're toasty
Gulp until you're roasty
Chug 'til he's not creepy
Wallow 'til you're weepy
Slow down if you're pukey
Don't worry if you're loopy
And tell that barkeep to his face
To pour a drink and leave you alone
And if he thinks he can card you
Then he's got another think coming
And the very idea of him cutting you off
Makes you wanna... hahahahaa... QUAFF!
Art of the Barkeep, featuring Rarity
Guest by guest, they gather together
Twilight's glass, filling it again so she can sip
Making sure the liquor flows smoothly
Absinthe is suddenly so hip!
Always gotta keep in mind her fast pace
Making sure she doesn’t end up shit-faced
I'm filling Twilight's glass
She works hard, coming here to unwind
Straight moonshine, don't you know she drinks it every time?
A single glass makes her perspire
You can see her green eyes catch afire
Sometimes she's free with what she shares
A bartender can't afford to care
Just fill up AJ's glass
Bartending's easy. For Pinkie Pie? Pour a drink.
Fluttershy likes martinis.
Blend vermouth and gin
Add an olive! Can't you see?
Something strong? Dash will be retching.
I don't lie, hard liquor makes her want to die!
So I just do my bartending best
Pour her a draft and mind the mess
I know she'll be a pain in the flank
(Rainbow's mean when she is tanked)
I'm filing Rainbow's glass!
Drink by drink, sip by sip
Scotch, Rum, Beer, Vodka, Gin
Mead or Mix, Whiskey Sour
More tips pour in every hour
And that's what barkeeps do best!
I lost it at the first line and didn't find it again until the end.
Well done.
This is hilarious!
Ha! I sang them all.
I love your brain.