MLP: Friendship is FTL

by SabreXio

The Adventure Begins

"So, where's the Flight Deck?", asked Dash

"Just through there", I answered, pointing to the door "Grimlock can show..."

BOOM
Something huge exploded and rocked the ship throwing us all off balance.

"Uh, Victor, what the hell was that?" I asked as I regained my footing

"I'm checkin' for ya", the computer replied
After a short pause, Victor came back.
"I hate to be a bummer gang, but it looks like a division of Rebel warships are laying siege to the spaceport", he reported with disproportional happiness

BOOM
Another explosion, more tremors.

"If I could make a suggestion", Spike said as he picked himself up "we may want to leave"

"Good idea", I agreed turning to my shipmates "Battle stations people"

We all split up and bolted for our respective positions. I skidded to a stop and quickly powered up the weapons. I had several screens that all fired up, each showing a different set of data, from weapon ammo and heat, to target and guidance.

"Shields up", Twilight said over radio

"Engines primed and ready", Dash said

"Guns online", I reported "Holy crap that's a lot of Rebels"
My targeting computer was lit up with rebel signatures who had formed a ring around the station. I began scanning the ships for a weak point.

"Ok here's the plan: Dash, you keep us movin' 'til I find a weakness. Once I do, I'll designate it and hammer it with lasers; you're going to bee-line through the hole and FTL us outta here"

"Thread the needle on your signal" she said "Child's play"

"Sparks: you already know what to do"

"Roger that, Blades" She replied

After our little briefing, Dash kicked the thrusters on and bolted out of the ship bay. Twilight had already raised the cloak so the ships would never see us leave. Once out, the cloak wore off leaving only a shield and Dash's piloting between us and a fiery doom. I kept scanning until I found my target: a Rebel auto-scout.

"Target acquired" I reported, designating the small ship on Dash's radar, "Soon as I blast that thing, go for it"

"Any time now" Dash replied. She was quite busy bobbing and weaving, dodging missiles and lasers. My weapons locked on and were ready. I fired.

"Lasers away!" I cried as two red bolts of focused light streaked forward, pounding the unshielded drone's engines, disabling it and causing it to float away a bit.

"Hang on, this is gonna be close" Dash said as she maneuvered the cruiser through the battle toward our exit. With inches to spare, Dash blasted through the hole and jumped us to Faster-Then-Light speeds. I relaxed and applauded our work.

"Nice work everybody" I said "Very nicely done"

"Man, say what you will about the Engi," Dash said, "but they can build a ship. This thing handles like a dream"

"Glad you approve", I replied as I powered down weapons "I just wish the Rebels would leave us alone"

"Well, maybe you should have thought of that before you messed with them" Twilight replied a little miffed

"Hey, you thought it was funny too" I shot back

"What did you do?" the pilot asked

"I might have played a few pranks on some rebel ships" I answered

"What kind of pranks?"

"Suggestion: recount 'drone dance party' incident" I heard Grimlock say

"Oh, that one" I said with a chuckle "I once reprogramed a Rebel Rigger's AP Drones to start dancing to Michael Jackson's Thriller"

"That's awesome" Dash replied through her laughter

"Oh and there was that time I modified a cruiser's comm system so instead of displaying a video feed of the bridge, it played a clip of Keyboard Cat"

"Ok, I'll admit, that one was kinda funny" Twilight said giggling a little

"It's just too easy when you take yourself that seriously" I said "but apparently they didn't find it very funny"

"I believe they defined it as, quote 'an unprovoked cyber attack with intent to sabotage Rebellion equipment' unquote" Spike added
We talked about the pranks I've pulled for a little while until I felt we needed to get back to work.

"Why don't you guys meet me here in the weapons room so we can discuss our next move" I said

"On my way, Blades" Twilight said

"How do I get there again?" asked Dash

"Recommendation: Follow" Grimlock said

---

A few minutes later, all five of us were assembled in the weapon bay.

"So..." Dash started "what kind of work do we do?"

"Whatever we want to" I answered "but there are a few rules..."
Grimlock interrupted, slipping into a hardwired response
"Rules of engagement are as follows: (1) We are not pirates or slavers, and we will conduct ourselves as such; (2) Pirates and slavers are always hostile; (3) If you are unsure of what you can or can not do, ask; (4) Do not do anything stupid"

"Thank you, Grim" I said as he finished "That's pretty much it, we just do whatever work comes up"

"I hate to interrupt, but there's a ship trying to hail us" Victor informed us

"Onscreen" I ordered as we all turned to look at the largest of my consoles. Onscreen was an Engi, most likely the ship's pilot, and he looked a little worried.

"Greetings" it said "fuel levels low: requesting assistance"

"So you need fuel?" I asked just to clarify. We had plenty of fuel cells, so we could spare them to help.

"Affirmative" it replied "We will exchange twenty scrap for three fuel cells"

"Deal" I replied with a nod "I'll send the cells over"

"Excellent" the pilot said with what I guess is the Engi equivalent of a smile "The scrap material has been prepared and is ready for exchange"

I had Spike rig up a special arm a while back that could be used to move packages between ships. Using it, Spike grabbed the crate of scrap from the Engi ship and replaced it with the crate containing the fuel cells.

"Transaction complete, you have our thanks Captain" the Engi said

"Think nothing of it" I replied "Safe travels"
The pilot cut contact and jumped to FTL. I turned back to my crew.

"Oh, and one rule I forgot: we always help if we can"

"Ok, so when do we get to do something crazy?" asked Dash "I really don't want to just trade stuff"

"Don't worry, Dash" Twilight said "We always have a way of getting into trouble"

Author's Note:

In this story, we will assume that one scrap equals 1000 credits and that prices at shops are in credits. Oh, and these will get better as I go, so just bear with me. And if you have any corrections or advice, please give examples of what you mean, not just 'more commas' Thanks.

Comments

[Them8]

How did you get a copy of my FTL rules?

[SabreXio]

2476768

I guess great minds think alike.

[Arceas Windfury]

Found story. Like story, Please write more story!