The Secret of Smarty Pants

by Rough_Draft

A Sympathetic Story

Ten – A Sympathetic Story

When she opened her eyes, Fluttershy could have sworn she was still dreaming. She really wished she could have stayed in the last dream, where she and Twilight were running through a meadow full of butterflies and cute little bunnies. This new dream was more like her nightmares about the Everfree Forest.

Her world was green, cramped, and hot. Hideous trees and faces stretched out beyond her.

But when she felt something sharp poke her wing, Fluttershy knew it was real. And then she remembered what happened. Running into herself outside the bathroom. Being hit with green fire. Falling into darkness and calling out for Twilight to save her—

Twilight! She pressed her hooves against the slimy green glass, seeing all her friends trapped in their own pods in the forest. Her mouth wouldn’t move, though she wanted to scream for them to wake up.

Right across from her was Twilight’s pod. Her beloved princess was sitting in her cell, staring—well, more like glaring—at nothing. Fluttershy wanted to apologize for letting her get tricked and captured. But she couldn’t get through.

“You’re awake,” a voice purred from the side. Fluttershy squeaked and looked up at the small changeling flying toward her pod. She remembered this one—Ichor. The changeling whose shoulder she’d fixed. It looked like she was doing fine now.

“W-why did you have to do this?” Fluttershy’s bottom lip quivered. “We never meant you any harm!”

Ichor bared her fangs—an aggressive sign in most creatures. “Foolish pony. Neither did we, but that’s the way the world works. We need your love for food and you refuse us!”

It was hard to stay civil when the changeling’s appearance was so threatening, but Fluttershy did her best. “But you could have asked us…”

“Ha! Looking like this? I think not!”

“But earlier… you mentioned a famine…”

Ichor’s sneer vanished.

“I-I’m sorry if I offended you—”

“No,” said the changeling. She looked away. “It’s fine.”

As she settled onto her hooves, Ichor looked around for anyone who might be listening. But she was the only changeling in the clearing and nopony else but Fluttershy was awake.

“Long ago, the Changeling Nation lived in a distant land called Morphopolis,” Ichor began. “It was very different from your Equestria. Beautiful mountains, canyons, and swamplands to the far east. In Morphopolis, there’s a special kind of flower that grew abundantly—the heart-rose. And in that flower is the most delicious nectar, made out of pure love and joy…”

Fluttershy saw the changeling smile dreamily, but knew her nostalgia wouldn’t last. These kinds of stories rarely stayed happy.

“But there was a blight on the land. The heart-roses stopped growing. There were terrible fights over the last crop between our kind. In the end, we had to leave in search of food. Imagine how hard that journey was, leaving behind what was once a beautiful country. And with each trip, our queen grew crueler. Always hiding, always running, always pretending to be something else, just to survive…”

Ichor’s voice trailed off. She looked up at the pegasus and sneered again. “But what would you ponies know about it? You’ve never suffered. You’ve never starved!”

To Fluttershy’s surprise, those accusations didn’t hurt much. In fact, they made her remember her history. There was that play she and her friends had performed in Canterlot on the last Hearth’s Warming Eve.

“I’m very, very sorry for your loss,” she replied softly, trying to be sensitive. She could see that the changeling was miserable, and she knew how to handle depressed critters. “But we’ve had those kind of troubles here in Equestria.”

“I doubt that very much.”

“No, really! A long time ago, there was a very cold winter…”

---

Shining Armor came up behind Cadance as she stared out from the royal balcony. “It’s late. You should really get your rest.”

“I can’t sleep,” Cadance sighed. “Not until I know Twilight and her friends are safe. Did the search party return?”

“Not yet.”

Cadance closed her eyes—just for a moment, she told herself. She wasn’t going to fall asleep until she saw that her friends were safe. She was just resting her eyes for a moment…

“Good evening, my dear.”

Cadance’s eyes flew open. She was sitting in the throne room, looking at Princess Luna.

“Horse feathers,” said Cadance. “I’m dreaming, aren’t I?”

“Do not worry yourself about it.” Her aunt trotted toward the throne. “You’ll need the rest. I bring a message to you from Twilight Sparkle.”

“Where is she? Is she all right? Where did the changelings take her—?”

Luna raised a hoof to Cadance’s mouth, silencing her. She smiled. “She asks me to tell you about the changelings’ plot. They’ve infiltrated nearly every corner of the Crystal Empire. Twilight tried to use secrets that only her friends would know to distinguish the impostors, but I fear that the changelings have grown smarter since our last meeting. They appear to be after the Elements of Harmony, to steal them and use them against us.”

Cadance felt her blood run cold. “They have the girls. So Shining Armor and I… are next.”

“I fear it is so.”

Although she was now a Princess, Cadance felt like a filly whenever she remembered the days she spent trapped in Canterlot’s crystal caverns. Cold, hungry, and alone. Desperate for help that would never come. Desperate to see her fiancée again. And the only laughter she heard was from Queen Chrysalis.

She would do everything in her power to spare everypony she knew from that fate.

“We have the Elements of Love and Patience,” she told Luna. “We can defend ourselves.”

“I am certain you can hold off the changelings, but without the Elements of Harmony, it may not be enough. Discord is developing a strategy to find Queen Chrysalis and I fear that my dear sister is losing the battle for Canterlot.”

Cadance nodded. “Very well. Tell Twilight to look after her friends and protect them. Her brother and I will do our part with the Crystal Ponies. We’ll root out every changeling in our midst.”

“I hope that may be enough, dear Cadance.” Luna smiled and bowed. “Farewell.”

---

Cadance blinked, feeling weak and groggy. She was lying in Shining Armor’s hooves and looking up at his worried expression.

“Thank goodness you’re awake,” he said. “You were passed out for a while!”

“Shining,” Cadance groaned. “Rouse the palace guard. We need to search every guest room right away.”

“Of course, dear.”

“And… tell them to be careful…”

---

The Crystal Empire was now on heightened alert. Pegasi flew out from the royal palace, delivering an emergency decree from Princess Cadance: all Crystal Ponies and traveling ponies were advised to take shelter for the night, and to report suspicious behavior to the nearest guard.

Fortunately, Wriggler knew how to avoid raising the ponies’ suspicion. After checking at the train station to make sure nopony had reported the absence of Sir Emerald of Canterlot, he took up his old disguise. Then he joined the other ponies in their wide-eyed panic and scrambling for shelter.

Moving quickly between alleys and small avenues, Wriggler made his way toward the palace. He trotted as casually as he could, keeping up a fearful expression for the benefit of guards that passed him by.

Queen’s bane, he thought, these ponies are getting vigilant. It’s a miracle they’re not asking for identification…

It galled him to remember how that young princess had seen through his Applejack disguise. He would have to be less obvious this time.

After a short pause to let a pair of pegasi fly overhead, Wriggler trotted straight toward the palace doors. A plan was already forming inside his head. It all depended on how gullible the two Crystal Ponies standing watch by the main entrance were.

“Please help!” he called out in Sir Emerald’s cultured voice. He pantomimed a stomach pain and dropped onto his hooves. “Oh, dear! Oh, dear! It hurts too much…!”

“What’s wrong?” asked the blue pony on the left. She turned to her friend. “Get the royal nurse! He needs medical attention!”

“Right!” said the lavender pony and dashed off.

Meanwhile, the blue pony was kneeling down beside Wriggler, who twitched and kicked his legs spastically. “It’s going to be all right. Just keep still. The nurse will be on her way.”

For a moment, Wriggler contemplated taking this pony’s form and using the teleport spell on her. There was quite a bit of love he could consume from her. But it was far too risky and her friend would be suspicious. Better to fake his illness a little longer and get inside the palace.

I have to get that doll, he reminded himself. It could be the key to solving our crisis.

When the lavender pony returned, she was accompanied by a shimmering white pony wearing a nurse’s hat. The nurse took one look at Wriggler and sighed.

“Oh, dear,” she said. “He looks like one of the guests from tonight’s banquet. Everypony who had the fish ended up getting sick. Bring him in. And please, be gentle.”

While he hadn’t counted on spoiled fish and other sick ponies, Wriggler wasn’t about to let go of an amazingly convenient cover story. He groaned and pressed a hoof into his mouth, pretending he was on the verge of throwing up, as the two Crystal Ponies carried him inside.

Through a long and winding hallway, the three ponies brought Wriggler into a medical ward. He was deposited onto an empty bed and the nurse pulled up a curtain to give him privacy. Through the curtain, he could hear other ponies groaning and gruesomely losing their supper. He was glad he couldn’t see any of it, though he was cursed with a very vivid imagination.

But at least he was inside. It was time for Phase Two.

With a deep breath to steady his nerves, Wriggler underwent another transformation. He let go of Sir Emerald and took on the appearance of a hospital orderly. A brown Crystal Pony with a dark mane and white scrubs. Then he pulled the curtain aside and trotted through the ward.

The nurse passed him without a glance in his direction. Wriggler hid a smile behind his hoof when he heard her go to his bed and say, “Now, sir, this medicine won’t taste very good, but it should help… oh, no…”

He was already bolting for the exit before she could finish.

From there, it was a simple matter of ducking around corners and hiding behind potted plants whenever somepony came into view. But step by step, inch by inch, Wriggler made his way through the palace and closer to the guest suites.

He went straight to Applejack’s room, which was unlocked for some reason. Wriggler decided to be extra careful and avoid leaving any hoofprints on the carpet. He let his wings emerge and hovered off the ground as he entered.

Fortunately, the doll was sitting lying on the bed. Smarty Pants, he believed it was called. Even at a short distance, he could feel a faint aura of love inside the toy. Fondness buried deep in its heart for everypony to draw upon. It brought a smile to Wriggler’s face as he trotted toward the bed and stretched out his hoof—

Almost too late, he spotted the three red crystals on the floor by the bed. They flashed and suddenly a glowing net sprang up around Wriggler, pinning him to the ground. He felt a wave of heat wash over him, causing his disguise to fail.

He fought against the net, but it was too strong. Wriggler slumped in defeat as the door opened and Shining Armor entered with a pair of royal guards behind him. The unicorn prince glared at his captive, then turned to his guards.

“Take him to the princess’s chamber at once,” he said. “And bring the doll. We have quite a few questions for this one.”

Comments

[djthomp]

Hmn, so they had an original, non-pony source of food at one point. Makes sense.

[Twilight_Scratch]

“Oh, dear,” she said. “He looks like one of the guests from tonight’s banquet. Everypony who had the fish ended up getting sick. Bring him in. And please, be gentle.”

Whether intentional or not, Airplane reference!