• Published 20th Jul 2013
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DisQord Continuum 2: Friendship is Futile - ZoidbergIsBestPony



Can the U.S.S. Enterprise Save Equestria from a Fate worse than Death? What about the Universe?

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Cry Havoc, and Let Slip the Dogs of War! (Part II)

Cry Havoc, and Let Slip the Dogs of War! (Part II)

“NOOOOOOOO!!!!!” a Borg drone suddenly screamed, running straight towards Luna.

Celestus neck snapped in surprise in the direction of the unknown Borg drone running straight for her.

“I cannot read your thoughts.” Celestus demanded, “Who are you?”

The drone ignored her. “Princess Luna! Do not forget who you are! You must stop her!”

“We are no longer Princess Luna,” was the reply. “We are Nightmare Moon and we shall become Dysnominox of Borg! Do not stop us.”

“No you’re not! You are Princess Luna of Equestria. You are the sister of Celestia. Was your sole purpose for daring to infiltrate this ship, with nothing but your magic to protect you from the weapons she fired at you, to simply come here just join her cause?”

Nightmare Moon paused. “We came here to save our sister. But we see now that there is nothing that requires saving.”

“That’s not true and you know it! Do you want to spend the rest of your life controlled by these things? Does Celestia look at peace at all?”

Two real Borg drones grabbed the imposter by her shoulders and restrained her.

“If you came to save your sister, then save her!” Luna shouted again. “Don’t join her! I’ve heard the stories about Nightmare Moon. Remember who you are and how you felt when you finally became Princess Luna once more. Remember how you felt!”

“Don’t listen to her!” said the voice inside of Nightmare Moon. “We are one. We will rule together. You are me!”

“No,” Nightmare Moon whispered. “We vowed we would never be you again! I vowed I would NEVER be you again!”

A second flash of light flickered in the eyes of the black Alicorn. The light dissipated and Luna’s softer eyes remained.

“I am here to rescue you dear sister, and I shall bring you home!” Luna announced proudly.

Celestus sighed, “Such a shame. You could have been so much more, but there is always room for another drone.

While Celestus was talking, a voice suddenly whispered into Chrysalis’s ear.

“Chrysalis, this is Captain Picard. Are you still there?”

The shock the cried out through the changeling’s eyes immediately retreated into hiding.

“They came back!” she thought, happy to hear the captain’s voice once again. She quickly tried to figure out a way to respond to him without letting Celestus become aware.

“And you…” Celestus turned to the imposter drone. “I should have known. Trying to usurp my throne again, Chrysalis?”

“We will stop you Celestus!” Chrysalis spoke loudly with Picard listening on the line. “Luna and I have both tracked you here to the main control room and we will stop you!”

“Princess Luna is there as well?” asked Picard. “Listen, we are almost in position to come for you. Is the trap prepared?”

“It will be a great irony how you both came so far and worked so hard, only to end up as mindless drones who will assimilate those you love.” Celestus gave a harsh and curt chuckle to her own wit.

Chrysalis bounced off of the Borg queen’s words to reply to Picard. “We haven’t failed yet…”

Picard took that as a yes. “Good. If you can, try to get as close to the outer hull as possible. If you can’t, you must do what needs to be done. Release the trap. We’re on our way.”

Chrysalis gulped. She knew all too well what that meant. If she couldn’t get herself and Luna out of this predicament, they were sitting ducks.

“And just what does that mean?” Celestus demanded, growing wary.

Celestus quickly searched through the collective mind. One of the drones quickly discovered a foreign device attached to a power distribution node.

“No!” she whispered, realization dawning on her.

The fake drone morphed before the queen. The mechanical components of her absorbed into her pale clammy skin which darkened until it was pitch black, covered in matching fur. Her arms lengthened as her hand and arm apparatus morphed into hooves. Holes spread through her body as an elongated horn sprouted from her forehead and crystal-clear wings spread out from the center of her back. Chrysalis now stood before the queen in her original form, with one exception. The devices Picard had given her were strapped around her waist.

Her metamorphosis loosened the drones’ grip on her long enough for her to buck them back. She grabbed the activation device from her side.

“Yes!” Chrysalis proudly replied, pressing the trigger on the device.


Onboard the Enterprise, Picard quickly spread the word.

“Picard to the fleet. Our package is being delivered. Standby to engage.”

Picard switched channels. “Picard to the Ferengi vessel, have your secured the vessel, Captain?”

Onboard the bridge of the Ferengi vessel, the lights were on and the air was flowing. Life support had returned. With her helmet removed from her protective suit, the captain breathed the fresh air of the room.

Nodding to her communications officer, the line was opened between the two vessels.

Captain Twilight Sparkle’s image played on the view screen on the bridge of the Enterprise.

“Yes, Captain,” Future Twilight replied, smiling. “Engineering reports life support is back and all other systems are operating normally. This ship has now been renamed the ‘United Equestrian Ship Harmony’. Now we just need to figure out how to operate it.”

“Excellent. Fortunately Ferengi ships are possibly the easiest vessels to pilot in the quadrant, but you’re still going to need some good piloting skills behind the helm.”

“I’ve got my best flyer on it!” Captain Twilight said with a nod to her helmspony.

Rainbow Dash was looking a little doubtfully at the buttons, switches, and controls, but when Twilight made that comment she straightened up in her chair, narrowed her eyes, and replied confidently. I got this!”

Twilight looked less then convinced. “Captain, perhaps we should take a few more minutes to test things out.”

Back on the Enterprise, Riker called out, “Captain, Chrysalis has triggered the package!”

The view screen cut off from Twilight and switched to the lead cube. The green lights emanating from over one third of the ship suddenly went dark. Small explosions could be seen spreading outward from a central point.

Picard flipped back to Twilight. “No time. We need to launch now. As soon as you’re ready, enter the fray. We will protect you as long as we can. Good luck, Captain.”

“You too, Captain,” Twilight replied.

The channel closed and Twilight opened another. “Bridge to Engineering.”

Within the confines of the sweltering, cramped armpit that was the engineering section of the Ferengi ship, Reginald Barclay was covered head to toe in wires.

“Barclay here,” he said unconfidently.

“Reg. Are the engines ready?”

“Well, I-I… I just need to fix a few more things.”

“I thought all the systems were working?”

“Well… yes… technically they are, but…”

“But…?”

“But, if we d-d-don’t want t-t-t-to die horrible d-deaths, I need to get the engines ready to eject the warp c-c-core at exactly the right time.”

“Can’t we launch while you’re working?” Twilight asked, a hint of frustration steadily building in her voice.

“Well I s-s-suppose you could, but I w-w-ould need to get to–”

Twilight closed the channel.

“Helm, you ready to do this?”

“Aye Ma’am!” she said, positioning herself as though she were about to fly this ship with her wings.

“Tactical, how are weapons looking?”

“It’s just point and punch, Cap’n,” said Applejack. “You tell me what ter hit, and I’ll give ya the best darn sharpshooting you never did see from an Apple farmer!”

Twilight wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or bad thing, but Applejack certainly looked ready.

“Comm., stay on the line and listen up for the Captain or anything else we need to know about. Let me know the second you hear anything.”

“Yes of course, Twilight dear… I mean: Yes, Captain,” said Rarity.

“Mr. Pinkie!” said Twilight.

Pinkie Pie was seated next to the captain in the first officer’s chair with her head upside-down and her hind legs waving in the air. “Hi Twilight!” she replied, smiling widely.

“Pinkie, why are you upside-down?” Twilight asked, cocking her head to try and look her in the eyes right-side up.

“We’re in space silly. There is no upside-down!”

“Oookay. Mr. Pinkie, keep your eyes out.”

“Eye Eye Captain Twi! With two Eyes!” she said with both eyes bulging outward as she saluted. The salute caused Pinkie to lose her balance entirely. She collapsed to the floor, landing on her head. She sat up to find birds flying wobbly around her head in a dizzy.

Twilight shook her head. “Helm, how fast can we catch up to the other ships?”

Rainbow smiled slyly. “Ten… seconds… flat!”

Twilight nodded. “Make it so.”


One hour and fifteen minutes before the Borg arrived at the Defensive Perimeter…

From within Holodeck 1 aboard the Enterprise, Captain Picard was explaining the EMP device to Chrysalis.

“Once you use it, you will be on the run…” said Captain Picard gravely.

Chrysalis gulped at the gravity of the situation. Her mind worked back and forth trying to process so much new information. The question that finally rose from her mind was one she never could have expected from herself.

“What happens to these Borg when the EMP goes off? With the machines dead, would they return to their old selves and help me?”

Picard frowned. “Unfortunately, the Borg’s relationship to its technology is symbiotic. One cannot survive without the other. Those machines regulate their bodily functions. When they go offline, the host will die.”


The explosions going off all around her caused Celestus to rage with anger. Her mind was working away trying to locate any unexploded devices and deactivate them, but she found hundreds of her drones were not responding. They had somehow all entered regeneration cycles and no longer processed her commands.

Chrysalis knew she had to move quickly. She tried to sneak over toward Princess Luna so they could run together.

Celestus snapped her mind back to the room and shot daggers straight at the changeling.

“YOU DID THIS!!!” she screamed charging straight for her.

Chrysalis looked mournfully at Luna. “I’m sorry,” was all she could muster. She closed her eyes tight and squeezed the trigger on the electronic box at her side.

A burst of lightning shot outward in a ring that appeared to penetrate straight through the walls and continue forward. Everything the ring touched flickered, sparked, and then died. With Celestus’s hoof outstretched and her eyes boiling with anger, she dropped inches away from Chrysalis’s neck.

“NOOOOOO!!!! Luna screamed running to her sister’s side. She picked up her sister in her hooves and shaking her. “Tia!” she called. “Wake up! Please! Answer me!” She turned to Chrysalis. “What have you done to her?” she demanded.

“Princess, I’m sorry,” she tried to explain. “I had no choice.”

Luna was about pounce on her for making such a cold statement, but something caught her attention. She leaned her face until it was barely an inch away from her sister’s. She could feel it.

“She’s breathing!” Luna proclaimed; her eyes blotchy, and her nose beginning to sniffle. “Help me get her up!”

Chrysalis stared in amazement. “That’s not possible,” she whispered under her breath, but Luna could hear her and cast a penetrating glare at her.

“You can either help me rescue my sister, or I can kill you now for what you’ve done!”

Chrysalis was taken aback. “No… it’s not like… I just… I’m glad she didn’t…” She lost her words. Since she couldn’t explain herself, she decided instead to help as the Alicorn had demanded. They each took a hoof over their shoulder and dragged her out of the room.

In truth, Chrysalis really was glad Celestia was somehow still alive, and not just because her freedom probably depended on it. She would never admit this to either of them, but Chrysalis never wanted to be the villain. She actually wanted to be the hero her saved her people, but her last desperate attempt failed so poorly, in the end, it was Princess Celestia who actually saved her people. Regardless of the ways things turned out, she was grateful for that, and she owed more than just her freedom to the princess for it.


Borg Pegasi scoured the skies, dive-bombing down into the crowd. Palace archers shot off arrows left and right attempting to bring them down to no avail. The Pegasi would simply dodge each attack. Not a single arrow made contact with its target.

The Pegasi bared down the archers, poised for assimilation, when a streak of rainbow came soaring out from the clouds.

Present-day Rainbow Dash had been holding out for as long as she could stomach not doing anything until ordered, but she had had enough. Her acceleration pushed her faster and further. She needed to time it just right for it to work.

The flying Borg realized something was approaching and attempted to adapt to the situation, but they simply weren’t fast enough.

Rainbow’s tail followed in her wake as she jetted down from the sky, bouncing just above the drones’ heads. The massive Sonic Rainboom burst forth from the epicenter of her touchdown. The blast flashed through the drones as a rainbow mushroom cloud rose up from the blast. None of the Pegasi drones remained.

“Awwww Yeaaaaah!” Rainbow celebrated, the Rainboom spreading outward in the sky.

On the ground, the scared ponies took the beauty of it as a sign. A sign that they can fight. A sign that they can win! Citizens and guards alike took to arms and burst forth after the drones down on the ground.

Worf was lying on the ground. His last kill had used up every last drop of his strength. When he heard the battle cries of everypony around him, he felt his spirit lifted. He turned over onto his back and saw it.

The Sonic Rainboom was still spreading outward; a massive multi-colored ring shining down onto him. He could feel its radiation rejuvenating him. His skin felt alive. The cold metals of his blade felt soothing to his hand.

“It is a good day to die…” he said softly. He thrust himself off the ground, his blade at the ready. “…but not for me!”


Lyra and Bon-Bon has gotten themselves lost in the palace. With the onslaught of strange creatures, they were ushered away from the princess and started to be escorted back outside until more creatures suddenly appeared. The guards left the two of them behind while they focused their efforts on the fight.

The stranded ponies tried to find their way back outside, but just kept getting turned around by another guard fighting another monster.

Eventually, they turned down yet another endless hallway, but this one had no monsters or guards running through it. They took a chance and tried to see where it might lead.

“Bon-Bon,” Lyra started, “I don’t think we’re supposed to be here. I haven’t even seen a guard in the last ten minutes.”

“That’s because they’re busy protecting us,” Bon-Bon tried to reassure her.

“Are you sure this is the way out?”

“For the last time, Lyra, I have no idea. But it’s the only hallway with no monsters in it, so I’m going down it!”

Lyra nodded noncommittally. She followed her friend as they continued forward. At the end of the corridor, they found themselves staring down a dark spiral staircase. A musty aroma emanated from within. For some reason, Bon-Bon could have sworn she heard the sounds of puppies barking.

“I don’t think this is the way out,” Bon-Bon confessed. “I thought maybe we could have stumbled upon a side entrance or something, but this clearly isn’t it.”

She tried to keep positive for Lyra’s sake, but she was finding it more and more difficult to hide just how scared she was.

“We better go back to where there are more guards around,” she suggested. “You know… to ask one how to leave the palace of course,” she quickly added.

Lyra clearly wasn’t fooled, but was also in complete agreement. She nodded rigorously and quickly shot around to head back in the other direction. Her head smacked straight into a black suit of armor.

She looked up int the pale gray face of one of those monsters staring straight back down at her. His arm was already reaching for her.

“Lyra!” Bon-Bon cried.

The tubes launched outward and immediately collapsed. The rest of the drone quickly followed suit, collapsing to the ground with a spear sticking straight out of his back.

Lyra almost passed out, but a voice snapped her back.

“Are you girls alright?” A figure further down the hallway called out. The figure approached them until it took the shape of a rather handsome Palace guard.

Lyra was still dazed from what had just happened. Bon-bon, on the other hoof, was in a different state. Her eyes lost focus as she swooned over her rescuer.

“I-um… that was… um-thank you!” she finally managed to say through her blushing.

“Thank me later,” the guard snapped back. “If you girls want to survive, you’ll come with me right now!” He extended his hoof toward them.

Bon-Bon grasped it gently. “I’m… I’m Bon-Bon… Oh and this is Lyra.”

“Lyra, Bon-Bon, I’m Arrow Point. Now if we’re through with introductions, come on!” He yanked her hard and trotted off back down the hallway.

“Wait up!” Lyra called out, scared of being left behind.

A faint “yip” followed her out.

“What was down that stairwell?” Lyra asked as they ran. “It sounded like puppies."

“That’s the dungeon,” Arrow replied.

“Why are there puppies in a dungeon?” Bon-Bon followed up.

“It’s a long story.”

Author's Note:

And the winner to last week's Riddle of References goes to:

Mauser1888

The reference "Cry Havoc, and Let Slip the Dogs of War!" comes from Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country

"You have not lived until you've experienced Shakespeare in the original Klingon!"