The Odd (Crossover of The Oddyssey)

by IBaBrony

Chapter 1: The Trolljan Horse

Chapter 1

The Trolljan Horse

It's been a couple of days since we left Ithaca and I have only come up with one thing. Boredom. Despite being on this journey to war, there's been nothing to do! I've been trying to keep myself entertained by flying around, bursting through clouds, moving them around, and causing all out awesomeness in the skies, but it was only temporary before I got tired and had to relax. Most of the time, I'm probably at one of the masts banging my head, waiting to get to Troy so I can bash some heads together. Even Pink cant wait, because she's usually so active and hyper! That's saying something even if she's bored. Well, I guess the army and I will have to endure...wait. Just over the horizon! I can see the outline of Troy! Thank CeleZeus! I thought it would be longer than this. I spread my wings out to catch some wind and take off into the sky. I fly ahead for a bit before turning to face the army.

"Troy is inbound, soldiers! Prepare yourselves, for when we land, we set up base camp!" I order. When I give the news, I see every pony lighten up as they go to gather there belongings to prepare for arrival. I fly back to the lead boat to wait for what seems like forever before we finally land on the sandy beaches I longed for so much. "Alright, soldiers! set up your tents over th..." I'm about to point my hoof to what looks like a dark forest where timberwolves may be inhabited, when I point to a nice open field where we can see everywhere in case an enemy comes uninvited. "There. I want some fire pits built so we can cook some bagels and muffins specifically for EuryloDerpy. You all know how she gets when she doesn't have her muffins." I then see EuryloDerpy spread her wings, jumping up, levitating in the air with her hooves stretched to the sky as she shouts "YES!" She immediately joins the crowd again after having her moment of joy. "Right, well lets get started! We don't have all day!" The army starts to fan out across the field and start setting up there tents. All except Achilles Jack who comes over to ask me a question.

"So, why am ah here again?" She asks me with a serious look.

"Well, you did say you had some business to take care of here when you visited my home land. I offered to let you come into battle with us and you agreed." Achilles Jack just narrows her eyes at me.

"That doesn't sound like what happened at all." She eyes me carefully.

"And all this could very well be just a story so who's talking?" We continue staring at each other for a moment when Achilles Jack breaks the silence.

"Ah'm goin' straight back ta mah tribe when all this is over. There are apples to buck." Achilles Jack gallops off to set up her own tent.

"You know you can return to them anytime because they're just as much in this war as my ponies are, right?" The glare I got was priceless!

"Shut up." She disappears into the sea of soldiers. I'm about to go and set up my tent when I see this gigantic palace of a temporary home not too far from where I am.

"What the..." I go to investigate, finding the one and only pony who would have set up this big flank tent. As soon as I find the entrance to the tent, I immediately figure out who set it up. "Rariclous, are you absolutely sure this is all necessary?" The question gets me a hard stare from the white unicorn.

"But of course, darling! One must simply not leave a bit of their lifestyle behind even if they are going into a long battle to win a war!" She then fits herself in a uniform, decked out with jewels.

"If you say so..." I open my mouth to say more when a pegasus bumps into me.

"Oh. I'm so sorry. I was just trying to look for Pink. She was here a minute ago and I had a question to ask her so..." I hold a hoof up to stop her.

"It's okay, Flutterpoleidus. Just be careful next time." I get up and brush myself off with my wings, getting a small smile from Flutterpoleidus.

"Thanks. I should go now. You know how she gets when waiting for battle." I gulp.

"Eeyup." At those words, I see a crimson stallion off in the distance in the camp , glaring at me. I quickly trot off to set up my own tent. "Note to self: Don't steal the lines of other ponies." After setting up my tent, I go to find EuryloDerpy to see if her blacksmith equipment is set up. I heard she does relatively well with being a blacksmith, but I haven't seen her work myself. "Hey there, EuryloDerpy!" She looks up from the anvil she just set up to give me a broad smile.

"Hello there, OdysseDash! Anything I can do to help?" I can never help but feel a great sense of joy around her. I guess she just has that kind of effect on ponies. Don't tell PeneleSparkle this, but she's kinda cute with her attitude.

"Are you all set up here? Because we're going to need you to sharpen any dull swords to get ready for battle." I inform.

"Yeah, just about done. For some reason, I keep dropping this anvil though. Almost got one our soldiers this time too, but it was completely accidental, I swear!" I just chuckle.

"Don't worry. I believe you. Just finish up and start sharpening swords." I order.

"Kay!" Derpy gets back to adjusting the anvil while I go to get myself ready. I have a feeling this is going to be one long and awesome battle! I stop immediately to ask her another question.

"Hey, do you have any extra anvils?" EuryloDerpy gives me a funny look.

"Umm...yeah. Why?" I smirk at the thought of my idea.

"They could be useful." EuryloDerpy shrugs and pulls a muffin out of nowhere and eats it. Seriously, where does she get all those muffins?

"Hey, can I have a muffin?" Yes, I was a little jealous. Don't judge me! Anyways, I head over to enjoy a few muffins after EuryloDerpy nods and pulls out a whole barrel full of muffins. "Wow. I can see why you love these so much."

2 hours later

"Soldiers! Prepare for imminent battle against Troy!" I order my men. I return to my tent to eat an apple and equip myself for battle as well, but when I turn around, I find myself face-to-face with a rather young goddess. I think...

"OdysseDash." I smile at the filly of a goddess.

"Well if it isn't Athena Bloom! How's it going at Olympus?" The small deity perks up a great deal.

"Amazin! I love hangin out with the others. Anyways, Ah'm here to tell you to watch yerself out there. Kay?" She confuses me sometimes.

'What the hay are you talking about?" She walks over to the set of spears I have bundled up by my sleeping bag, still keeping her eyes on me.

"Ah'm talkin' about how you can be reckless. Don't get ahead of yerself if you wanna win this war." Athena Bloom warns.

"Umm... yeah, we have thousands of ponies helping out in this war." Athena turns her full attention to me.

"And they have walls as big as two barns stacked on top of each other! They have the best military defense in all of Equestria! You must fight this battle with bravery and courage." I just roll my eyes.

"You don't think I have all that?" Athena Bloom just shrugs.

"I dunno. I just told you what CeleZeus told HermSnips to tell me to tell you." Ehh...What? "Anyways, good luck in battle!" With that, she disappears.

"Well... That was interesting." Just as I'm about to get back to war preparations, she comes back to me.

"Uhh, can you tell me why yer havin' anvils mass produced and shipped over here?" I chuckle and turn to her.

"Okay, I had this idea."

10 years later

Well I was right! This marks the tenth year of battle and it was awesome! the rush of adrenaline, the excitement of battle, I felt so alive! Unfortunately, we have lost thousands of ponies in battle. Many to Troy's toughest soldier, Vector. Or at least that's what I think he's called... Never mind. Anyways, we've been fighting for a long time with no way to tell who's side the gods were on.

"Fight on, soldiers! This is our year!" I dodge an enemy attacking me by using my sword to block before pushing forward knocking the pony off balance, using my wings to help me out because this pony was husky! I then slay the enemy soldier, only to look back in surprise as I see a pegasus flying at me, screaming, about to kill me when my favorite part happens. An anvil smashes down onto the pony's head. I look up to see EuryloDerpy smiling overhead. "Thanks!"

"Any time!" She flies off to get another anvil, when every pony stops to hear a pony miraculously shouting over every ponies battle cries and screaming.

"Achilles Jack!" I look to see her attention turn towards Sector... wait, I just changed his name again, didn't I? Dang it. "I challenge you! I hear you're the toughest and most invincible pony in all of Greece! Fight me and I shall prove the lunacy of those words I have heard!" Achilles Jack stabs a pony in the gut and steals his sword.

"Ya have a lot a guts thinkin' you can beat me." Hector (For once I got it right!) advances towards Achilles Jack as the battle starts up again, only to be stopped by a sword flying towards him, digging itself into the ground right in front of him. Achilles Jack... Hold on. I draw my sword out and slice a pony in the chest, letting her drop dead. So, anyways, Achilles Jack and... umm... Lector are just inches away now, Pector still staring at the sword. At the last second, Nector Just notices Achilles Jack right in front of him with her hind hooves in the air. Achilles Jack bucks the hilt of the sword in the ground to deliver a nasty blow to Dector's forehead and causing the sword to fly up into the air, spinning out of control. Fector is collapsed onto the ground on his back and when he opens his eyes, he sees the sword falling. Too late to react... Dang it, another enemy! I slice the ponies neck turning back to see the sword fallen, hilt facing straight up as the blade stands tall in the fallen warrior's chest. Wow. I wish I wasn't INTERRUPTED BY SO MANY ENEMIES so that I would have seen all of the awesomeness that just happened.

A lot of ponies, including myself, start cheering for Achilles Jack when we see her receive an arrow to the knee. We all gasp as she falls to the ground. Seems like some pony has a thing for repetitive memes. That's when all Tartaurus breaks loose. All Greek soldiers put their A-game on, forcing all the Trojans back into the safety of their gigantic walls.

Soon, all the Greeks are back at the base camp, grieving for our biggest loss in the war yet.

"Achilles Jack, was the greatest warrior ever seen on the battle field." Every pony keeps silent as the new leader of the Maremidons grieves. "She was the strongest of mares and it was weird how she smelled of..." Then a voice cuts in interrupting the funeral.

"What the hay is goin' on here?!" We all look to the wooden casket in surprise as we hear Achilles Jack's voice. We then see her head poke out of it, looking around in confusion. "And why am I in a casket?" Every pony gasps except me. A little too late, every pony!

"I...We thought you were dead!" Achilles Jack looks at the now former new leader with a raised eyebrow.

"Seriously? You couldn't have checked to see if ah still had a pulse goin' on?" Only silence answers her. "Well, y'all should get back to prepare for the next battle. Every pony, go back to your lives. There's nothing to see here. And there is definitely no pony about to say what ah smelled like." She glares at the former new leader who backs off, smiling sheepishly before galloping away to his tent in fear. "OdysseDash, a word please?" I head on over as Achilles Jack gets out of the casket.

"Good thing you're alive! It would have been totally uncool if that arrow actually killed you." She just laughs.

"It simply does not take just one arrow to defeat Achilles Jack." Well. I guess an arrow in the knee doesn't disable a pony. "Anyways, we're going ta have to come up with a way ta get inside those walls. For all the Trojans know, Ah'm still dead. We ain't gettin anywhere into those walls using an iron hoof." We both start pondering for a while, when I see the boats and get an idea.

"You up for a little trickery?" Achilles Jack gives me a curious look. "Lets go smash some boats. Or... at least remove a lot of nails." Just then Pink pops up right in front of me shouting "WOOHOO!!!" As she stands on her hind hooves with a crazed look holding a battle axe in her forehooves.

"PINK! WAIT!"

1 week later

This is gonna be awesome! We've finally finished building this gigantic wooden horse by dismantling a few boats. Most of the soldiers are currently piled into it, along with myself. The only lame part about it is, IT'S SO CRAMPED IN HERE! Hasn't any pony ever known I'm claustrophobic? Well, I guess I should blame myself because this was my idea... So, Achilles Jack is currently pulling us to Troy while we're inside the work of art. Well, at least everything but the face is a work of art. The face looks kinda messed up. And by that, I mean it looks like CeleZues when she's in a trollish mood, about to troll some pony. You know, as we all get nearer and nearer to Troy, I start to wonder to myself, why the buck did I make Achilles Jack pull the Trolljan horse when they believe her to be dead? Hopefully this'll turn out better than I think it will. Out lives depend on it.

The tension rises as we come to a stop. I decide to peek through a small crack in the front of the horse to see what is going on. Achilles Jack starts to knock on the big walls of Troy.

"Who's there?" a pony replies from the other side.

"Achilles Jack." She starts shuffling her hooves in impatience.

"Achilles Jack who?" I can see her stop her shuffling, starting to glare at the inconspicuous pony behind the doors.

"This ain't no joke." She replies irritably.

"I don't get it." I can hear some ponies in here snickering along with me.

"Consarnit! Just open the doors! Ah'm a guest!" I turn my full attention to the doors which fly right open to reveal... balloons and... a bunch of party necessities. Okay, where is Pink? wait, she's right here next to me and Rariclous. What the hay is going on? Every pony is smiling. "Hey, y'all!" Just then, the doors shut immediately to open a minute later to show every pony behind the doors, pointing spears at Achilles Jack with looks of war on their faces. Then they all look up to observe the Trolljan horse. "What? Never seen a peace offerin before?" The Trojans share looks of confusion, when a pony departs the sea of Trojan warriors.

"Achilles Jack! I thought we killed you in the last battle! Where are your Greek friends?" King Pryon, I believe his name is, looks around eagerly to find where we might be hiding. He has no idea!

"Nnope. They're uhh... gone, ya see? They um... left." Oh crud. Now I'm really starting to question myself.

"Really now?" Wow. He's seriously stupid enough to buy into Achilles Jack's lies?

"Be warned!" And, there's the start of our biggest problem. The soothsayer. "This pony lies!" Crud.

"How can you be so sure?" Wow. He really is stupid enough.

"Well, for the most part, she is struggling to find the words to say, and second, I have godly insight. It was revealed that a pony just like her would come with a wooden horse like this with what looks like... a troll face... and then she'd try to..." The soothsayer is silenced as I witness an anvil falling onto her from above. Wait... that means... Crap, EuryloDerpy! Peeking through another crack at the top of the structure, I see EuryloDerpy quickly hide behind a cloud where one of her secret anvil stashes are.

"You see? It's a sign from, uhh...HephaestusBell!" Oh god, Achilles Jack. Last time I remember, HaphaestusBell was thrown off of Olympus for being too white. I still think they were being a bit racist about that. I only get more nervous as King Pryon gives a hard stare at the Trolljan Horse. We all start getting worried as every second goes by.;

"I'll take it!" The King Pryon declares with a smile ten miles wide. Everyone in Troy starts cheering, Achilles Jack sighing in relief. Soon enough we're wheeled into the walls of Troy. Now for the most boring part of the plan. Waiting. Ughh.

I am so bored!!! I mean look at the Trojans! They've been partying all night! When the hay are they going to to bed?! I have nothing to do all cooped up in this big flank and cramped horse while they're down there making us all jealous of their cakes and fancy foods and whatever else they're eating down...

"OdysseDash, pardon me, but I think they have gone inside for the night." I give a hopeful look to Rariclous before looking out through the small crack to see all the partying has died down and every pony went inside for the night.

"All right, every pony! Through the exit and open the doors!" Every pony starts moving as the Trolljan horse starts emptying out. I'm not too happy with the design of this because the only exit is... the flank. It feels gross just thinking about it. So, as the Horse starts emptying out, I fly out of the thing, trying to get the thought of exiting through the rear end out of my mind. So gross... Well, at least I'm out of there. It was terrible, it smelled like sweat and smelly hoof, and like I said, claustrophobia kicked in. Then I hear Pink's stomach growling. Might be trouble.

"I'm hungry. Oh look! Cake!" I'm about to fly over to her to stop her and get her focused on the mission before she stuffs her face with cake. "Mmm!" She licks her lips before her smile disappears. "Wait a minute..." She tastes the cake a bit more and judging by the look on her face, she just got pissed off. "They stole my recipe..." Oh no. "They stole my recipe!" Hurry up with those gates! "THEY STOLE MY RECIPE!!!" Pink swings out her battle axe with a look of pure rage on her face. Coincidentally, there is a lightning lightning and thunder as soon as she pulls out her weapon. Every pony reacts to her shouting and ready their weapons for imminent battle as the Trojans pile out of there homes, battle ready with surprised looks on their faces as they are greeted by a pink pony swinging a huge battle axe epically owning a lot of their ponies and a swarm of Greek soldiers. Soon enough, due to the surprise attack, Troy surrenders and the war is won. Unfortunately, Achilles actually does die. It was a simple mistake made by EuryloDerpy. Go figure. Also, during that last battle, I found out the gods were on the Greek's side, but I was too engaged in battle to notice an arrow flying to my head only to be blocked by Athena Bloom. Can't believe I didn't see her. I really wanted to say hi.

So, it is after the battle that we start to prepare for our departure from Troy and I go to confront EuryloDerpy.

"Hai there!" She waves to me with the same derp-eyed look with her smile disappearing as soon as she sees I'm unamused.

"Euryloderpy, what was that? You dropped an anvil on Achilles Jack, ultimately killing her for real this time! What the hay?!" EuryloDerpy shrinks back.

"I just don't know what went wrong." Her usual response when she makes a derp.

"You son of a seapony! You killed the greatest warrior in all of Greece and this is all you have to say?!" She flattens herself down to the ground with her hooves covering her face.

"I...I..." then, I regret this, but she hits me with disappointment. Towards myself. Why does she have to be so innocent?!

"You..." I can't find the right words. what the hay is wrong with me?! "I'm sorry. just be really careful next time. Sorry to say, but you will be serving time in the dungeon for a year." I decide. She slowly gets back up before wiping a tear off her face.

"O...Okay." She pulls out a muffin in apology. I stare at it for a few seconds before looking back to EuryloDerpy who is still offering it to me.

"Fine." I take the muffin and start eating it. I need to learn how to make one of these! "Apology accepted." I notice EuryloDerpy's face brighten up a great deal before I make another response. "You're still doing time though."

"Okay." She heads off to start packing for the trip back home before Granny Agamemnon, as Achilles Jack used to call her, trots up to me.

"OdysseDash. It has been great to have you in battle. Considering you tried to fool us by sewing salt into the farm fields at your home instead of seeds." Well, this wasn't what I expected.

"Heheh, umm... yeah, about that..." She stops me.

"Save it. I completely understand that you wouldn't want to leave the safety of your home where your... umm... wife and kid live. How the hay does that even work anyways?" I just chuckle.

"Long story. PeneleSparkle is a unicorn, remember?" Granny Agamemnon nods in acknowledgement. "Well, it's been a pleasure to be in battle with you. safe travels under CeleZues' skies and above Poseidon Scratch's waters. Speaking of which, I need to do something quickly. Catch ya later!" I spread out my wings and fly to a secluded area Where my wings are still spread out as I declare to the heavens our victory. You know, she acts a lot younger than she really is. I don't get that.

"Gods of Olympus! Hear me! I am OdysseDash! She who made The Trolljan Horse and brought down Troy! I, a mare, have done this all on my own! How about that, suckers?!" I fall to the ground in surprise as I hear wubs coming deep from within the ocean. Then I hear the voice of Poseidon Scratch.

"Aww yeah! How about those beats?" I get up smiling.

"What's up, Poseidon, Scratch? That a new beat?" I see Poseidon Scratch's face forming in the waves of the ocean.

"Hay yeah! Pretty sweet, right?"

"Definitely! Hey, did you see my awesomeness back there?" I can see Poseidon Scratch nodding her head in the reflection of the waves.

"Yeah, you were pretty cool! However, I heard your gloating and I'd like to say that you kinda didn't do it on your own. Didn't you see that arrow being stopped in midair?" I obviously didn't so, my answer is obvious.

"There was no arrow! Where the hay would you get that idea from?" Poseidon Scratch's smile vanishes and the wubs suddenly start to get quieter.

"OdysseDash, you do not believe. She was there, yet you did not see."

"I did not see because she was not there." Downfall in three...two...one...

"Okay, why would you not believe a god? I witnessed it! as did all of Olympus. If you will not believe, you will learn." Poseidon Scratch starts playing a creepy techno beat.

"Learn what?" I start feeling only a little fear as Poseidon Scratch's voice starts to boom louder.

"That without the gods, pony kind is screwed." With that, the music ends in an upbeat tempo that stops suddenly, then Poseidon Scratch disappears.

"That...was...AWESOME!"

So then I decide to head back to the boats where most of the fleet has already departed except for the ponies from my land.

"Oh hi! I was wondering where you went!" Oh no. Pink is going into another personal debate. I can tell. "You know, I was thinking. I saw their assortment of foods and I got an idea when I saw their cherries and bread. Maybe I could come up with something like a Chimmy Cherry! OOH! Maybe I could call it a Cherry Chonga! I dunno. What do you think? Chimmy Cherry or Cherry Chonga? Chimmy Cherry or Cherry Chonga? Chimmy Cherry or Cherry Chonga? Chimmy Cherry or Cherry Chonga...?" She just continues on and on until I stop her.

"Pink, please! We gotta head home now." With that, all of my soldiers pile up onto the ships.

"I feel like my great great great great great great granddaughter might have the same debate with herself." And I hope my great great great great great great granddaughter will not have to put up with it. Hopefully It'll be Rariclous's kin that has to deal with it. I don't know why it's just... I don't know. So, anyways, we all gather all our belongings, including EuryloDerpy who ties a cloud with her anvil stash to the mast of the ship before joining us, accidentally crashing onto the boat. Everyone chuckles at the derp.

"Careful not to sink it again." I humor. We take off to the sea and after a while, we realize we aren't headed in the right direction. This is where the real oddities begin!

Comments

[legofreak18]

i liked this episode. It had some fun in it. when i thought you would've made achilles jack survive i I wonder how big a problem killing everyone in Odyssedash's crew will be for you. oh yeah, why the buck is rarity there? she hates violence!

[IBaBrony]

You do know that when I include the mane 6 I have to include rarity, right? Plus, she was not mentioned anywhere in the battle. Makes you think, don't it? Also, legofreak, I am personally making you my criticizing Dutch bag! (Don't take it the wrong way. I am not racist and I mean this in a good way.) I need someone like you to give me pointers like that. Thanks for the feedback! You are a good dutch bag an I give a bro hoof to you and everyone reading this! Derpy, please give the nice bronies a bro hoof. /) Umm... That's a wing. Wutevs. Bro hoof! /)

[legofreak18]

1983148 Matt, I call most of my friends bastard. calling me a dutch bag is not offensive at all. I take it as a compliment

[Irongalley]

This is bound for fun! I also just got that feel, you know, when you feel attached to a character? When Pinkie said that about their food and how she could make something out of it. It made me think.

After all they've been through and all that they've seen, they're still up and ready for more and still looking forward to their lives outside of war... That is a feeling I'd love to put into my stories! Great job, slightly rushed, awesome and not gory enough that it takes away from the lighthearted experience. I really liked this.

[IBaBrony]

You sir just made my weekend!

Just a warning, the next chapter is probably going to upset all you Trixie lovers out there.
"Umm... what?"
You'll see...

And another news; I just started my own blog. mainly about updates that will be coming in the near future. Thanks for the support!