We of the Society for the Extraction, Archiving, and Preservation of the Older, Non-Equestrian Years (SEAPONEY) thank you for your continued interest in “Friendship is Optimal: Spiraling Upwards.” We appreciate the bits that Celestia has provided to us from your enjoyment.
If you are seeing this message, it means that our sensors have detected an insufficient brain structure to read the chapter “A Millennium.” The chapter requires having crossed the following thresholds:
- Reading level at Grade 111 or its equivalent from a tutor accredited by the MISS CHEERILEE subroutine.
- Emotional maturity of scale 9. Those below this threshold reported long-term depression and occasional heart explosions from the chapter.
- Fluency in Modern, Middle, and Ancient Equestrian, Gryphonian, Tortoise-speech, Prior-world Japanese, Current Japonese, Treeish, and Celesperanto.
Please contact Princess Celestia and ask her for the above modifications before attempting to re-access the chapter.
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The Society would like to remind you that, while reading in text can be fun and exciting, it is still a lossy method of telling a story. You may wish to enjoy “Friendship is Optimal: Spiraling Upwards” in another method.
To experience the story in FullSurroundExperience, use SendCode 51.65678965. SendCode can be accessed by transmitting the number with your horn, vibrating your wings at a frequency equal to the number, or by pushing your hooves together with a pressure equal to the number in kilopascolts.
FullSurroundExperience recreates the events of the story around you while you go invisible and observe. It does not allow you to see scenes that occur outside of the story but must have happened.
Additional methods of enjoying the story are listed below with SendCode:
Cinema: SC 63.18470140
Stage Play: SC 91.47209573
Audiobook (lossy): SC 31.56792273
DirectToMemory: SC 71.87858776
LiveOut—enjoy fiction as if it were real! Step into the mind of a character and live the entire story in real time!
To experience the events as character “Little Lovehorn”, use SendCode 51.89420201
To experience the events as character “Princess Celestia” (lossy)*, use SendCode 51.89420202
To experience the events as three characters “Hoof Dame,” “Garlic Parm,” and “Moon Sailor,” use SendCode 51.89420203
To experience the events as all characters in sequence, use SendCode 51.89420200
* LiveOut Productions reminds you that all LiveOut story experiences where you temporarily exist as Princess Celestia are necessarily lossy.
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SEAPONEY is always recruiting new members! If you have an interest in the dark days before Celestia made Equestria and took care of ponies, consider joining. We have openings for researchers, translators, archivists, and artisans of all stripes. Experienced SEAPONEYs may even get to see actual objects preserved from the former world! Princess Celestia understands that certain unique works of art and creation had worth in their physical form, such that copies were not as valuable. With her permission, you can access images of the secret vaults where they are kept! Join today!
The story will continue at the point at which we are once again able to transmit in a way you will appreciate.
Warning: Toxic Feels?
:O
Thanks for the warning there.
:| Oh no.
Somepony get me an Equestran Experience.
I'm going in.
Just wait until they invite in the aliens
Damn inefficient brain... guess I'll need to buy a new one.
Heh. Very nice.
2361061
I have a friend who wrote lyrics for it. They start “Ku… brick… made… this film!” and end “Imagine what he could have done… with… a… script!”
2361112
I know a lot of people who love 2001, but in my book it's one of the most pretentious, self-indulgent movies ever made. Yes, I know there's no sound in space, but there is sound in space MOVIES. Because audio is a cue for your watchers.
Really the only Kubrick I like are Dr. Strangelove and the first half of Full Metal Jacket.
2361194
I’ve slept through it twice, and regretted the waste of three hours both times.
Clarke is also highly overrated—I mean, 2001 the book is bad enough, but just like Rama, the series decays exponentially. 3001 is Dan-Brown-grade trash.
2362523
Agreed on 3001. 2001 the book was so refreshing after seeing the movie that I couldn't hate it.
And while he is overrated, he's not *bad*. Some of his short stories are great. At times I find myself forgetting whether a certain concept is from Clarke's White Hart series or Asimov's Azazel series.
Still, if I had to pick a Big Three, I'd kick Clarke out and put in Frederik Pohl, or maybe A.E. Van Vogt.
2363160
Not sure I’ve read any Van Vogt beyond the Null A stuff, and that’s just weird. Pohl is good. (Heinlein is Best Prony, of course.)
Speaking of Heinlein, I only recently discovered Christopher Anvil, who’s quite similar to early Heinlein, and would be my nomination for best little-known classic SF writer. (For vague definitions of classic, anyway—he was active from the fifties to, sporadically at least, his death in 2010.)
I'm going to be going to bed every night whispering "I want to emegrate to Equestria" into my pillow from now on because of you.
I hope this satisfies your values.
3159387
through friendship and ponies
2361194
Ah, but use of silence can definitely heighten tension, especially with a good soundtrack!