Fallout Equestria: Razor's Edge

by Shukin

Prologue: Cake's Dilemma

FALLOUT: EQUESTRIA
RAZOR'S EDGE
by Shukin

Prologue: Cake's Dilemma

Somepony older than many of us said that "life is like a cake box." I never understood that saying. How could a cake make any difference, and why would life be like one? Earlier, I thought it could've been talking about food, as a mean of survival. You know, like "life is food." It was too simple for what everypony was and acted like, so I discarded it with time. Maybe it was about the box itself, a way to protect something, "life is security." If it was, I wouldn't need weapons, or to learn how to kill, or to cope with the deaths of many people that I cared, ponies and griffin alike. Just now, while my throat closes and I choke, gasping for any air, that I could finally understand what that meant. It's not about the cake, nor about the box. It's not about security, or food, or survival. I clenched my claws around the heavy metal bar that locked my left wing to the ground and vainly forced it, without results.

My eyes struggled to stay open in the salty and irradiated water, a burning sensation that made me writhe and fight against everything that held me back. I could feel tears, even though they were lost immediately to the sea, never once touching my beak. Life is about the experience. You know it's a cake box. You know that there's a cake inside. I felt water filling my lungs, and my body started felling weak. Again, I tried to shake my wing free, to no avail.

What's important is opening the box. It's watching the little mystery of "what flavor would the cake be" unravel in front of your own eyes. It's having a goal, and reaching it, receiving your deserved prize for your efforts.

You know that a box is a box. You know that a cake is a cake. Still, you'll never know the flavor if you never open the box.

I opened the box.

I could hear an explosion, its light barely shining through the layer of water that separated me from my liberty, and from my old life. A rain of shrapnel poured around me, cutting through the dark waters that blocked my breath. I could feel time slowing down around me, and a piercing pain from my neck to my toes, locking me in agonizing suffocation while sharp pain kept me alive through my dislocated wing. Instinctively, I reached for my hindlegs. Was that really my only choice? I could feel the now-soaked parchment wrapping the blade's base, forming a makeshift handhold. I didn't have time to think, but my mind couldn't stop its screams, flooding my head with warnings and thoughts of excruciating pain.

The machete in my hands was my last hope for survival. I wanted to scream, to drown the pain in noise and adrenaline, but I couldn't. The sharp blade, made this morning, shone even in such dark place. I admired my craftsmanship, sharpened from a carriage's bumper, with a cut good enough to dismember a pony with one good attack.

My free wing shook as I, as fast as I could underwater and nearly unconscious, slowly brought the blade's tip to my shoulder. There were no tears left when I felt the cold metal against my wet feathers. I thought, once more, about screaming, and stopped myself before doing something so stupid. I don't have a lot of oxygen to begin with, and the little I do can't be lost into something so trivial, so... necessary.

It was now or never. Another explosion. Red painted the ocean. I couldn't keep my beak shut, and screamed. I screamed louder and louder, punching the sharpened metal against my shoulder, puncturing my flesh, ripping apart feathers and fur alike, scream after scream shaking and hacking my wing away. I felt every hit, every cut and movement of the blade inside my shoulder. I wanted to puke, giving water the opportunity it waited for, swallowing copious amounts of what should've been my liquid death.

I wouldn't die. I couldn't die.

---

I woke up, the fresh smell of baking bread breaking into my nostrils, and I salivate. I was hungry, starving. She notices me, I shiver and close my wings around myself, trying to shake the feeling of dread, death and pain that tormented me earlier.

"Look's like someone had a bad dream," her sweet voice calmed me, I just nodded back. Through the cracks, light poured inside the little cabin I was into, along with the sweet smell and the beautiful voice of a mare, probably a baker.

I woke up, still, I wasn't feeling well. "Wha's happen..." I couldn't speak properly, something mangled my voice and, as soon as I notice something's wrong, my ribs kick me in overdrive; I couldn't breathe. I cover my mouth barely before coughing, sharp bursts of pain locking me in my axis, and wetness in my talons alerts me. A quick look and I confirm that it's blood.

"Don't strain yourself, griffin, it's going to worsen your condition. You're in Razor's Edge, in the middle of nowhere crossing with nothing. I'll be your host. You can call me Sweet Buns, if you want, but I'd love if you called me by my name, Raspberry Cake."

---

Level: 1

S: 5 | P: 4 | E: 7 | C: 9 | I: 6 | A: 5 | L: 4

Tags: Barter, Melee Weapons, Repair

Skills:
Barter: 37 Energy Weapons: 12 Explosives: 12 Guns: 14 Lockpick: 12 Medicine: 16
Melee Weapons: 29 Repair: 31 Science: 16 Sneak: 14 Speech: 22 Survival: 18 Unarmed: 18

Perks:

---

Author's Note:

New try at a FO:E side story. Let's see how far this one goes.

Comments

[Doomande]

So... I am rather split now.

The dream sequence looked rather good, if it is one that is. It made me want to learn more about our griffin friend, made me really want to know where the heck he is since there is salt water, and what he did to piss someone off to do such a thing to him. But the part after... There is so many tense shifts in it, each sentence look somewhat out of place to me. Like they all are missing a little words, or something else to make all the small links into a real chain that can run smoothly.

That it was some asshatery to make such a dream sequence and then jump to such a scene is something else, and tolerated asshatery, but after such a kick to the balls, such a promise for hectic action as you fight for your life, and then the drop down into that scene...

I will follow this some more later on, but mostly because of the premise, and not so much what I have seen here, sad to say.

Nitpicks:
"Somepony older than many of us said that "life is like a cake box." I think that you want an once somewhere in here.
"You know that a box is a box. You know that a cake is a cake." I think that it would flow better with the first a in each of these sentences being switched out with a the
"I reached for my hindlegs" Griffins have a pair of legs and arms, so there is no need for the hind here.
"I don't have a lot of oxygen to begin with, and the little I do can't be lost into something so trivial," You have a tense shift here, should be in past tense.
"and I salivate." Tense shift.
" She notices me, I shiver and close my wings around myself, " Tense shift.
"I woke up, still, I wasn't feeling well." I think you want to re work this whole part, because it is rather clunky.
"as soon as I notice something's wrong" Tense shift
" I cover my mouth barely before coughing" Tense shift.
"and wetness in my talons alerts me." Tense shift.
"A quick look and I confirm that it's blood. " This is a bit clunky as it is, would "A quick look confirmed that it was blood" or something like that not fit better here?
" it's going to worsen your condition" I think that there is missing a only here, because I have never heard that sentence without it.