Rarity and the Quest for the Bright Sapphire Gem

by Eagerelo

Ch.1

In the afternoon the mailpony slipped a letter under the doors of the Carousel Boutique, Rarity was working on the next "most clever of designs" dress with Spike, until she notices the slipped letter. Rarity was not expecting a note from anypony though she needed to take a break from her work. Using her telekinesis, Rarity opened the paper and began to read. "A Special Gold Silk by next week, who in Equestria needs silk at such short notice, uhh I despise being rushed, don't you agree opal?" The pet kitten rolled its eyes in response. "Spike get your quill ready we have a list to write." Spike nodded in return as he pulled out his scroll and quill, Rarity levitated her supplies neatly near a corner. "Do you think twilight, would mind if I borrowed you for the rest of today? I do need the extra hand." Spike replied "Oh don't worry about Twilight; she wont even know Im gone, she's been to busy practicing a new spell for Celestia. So what do we need?" Rarity put a hoof under her chin before she spoke. "In order to make this special gold silk, I need to go to Canterlot for the Bright Sapphire Gem. Come along Spike, lets head over to the train."

Spike and Rarity exit the shop; binging along two saddle bags, sunglasses, and a wagon full of hair products and clothing. "Rarity couldn't we have packed a little bit less?" Spike asked, of course he carried all of the packing. "I mean how is all of this going to fit inside the carriage." Rarity ignored him, she knew of her obsession with her materials, but its impossible to leave home without it. Eventually they made their way to the train, Ponyville transportation was free of any charge regarding travel. The two mares working at the station awed at the huge luggage towering behind the white unicorn. The two workers were aware of Rarity's overstocking issue but the size of this pile up was too much. After some grudging and complaining the luggage managed to fit inside a booth, Both Rarity and Spike are on their way to Canterlot.

"Check... check... and check." Spike listed down all the items Rarity needs for her silk. it wasn't much, but the Bright Sapphire Gem is very rare and will be difficult to find. Rarity did plan to stay at the castle but both the princesses were busy on royal duties, so she will need to find a hotel downtown somewhere. It did not take long to arrive at the station, what made the trip longer was unloading the all the baggage. Rarity and Spike walk to the outskirts of Canterlot, they met gazes with many sketchy ponies along the way, this made Spike uneasy. Rarity picked the most suitable place to her standards, and they both settled in the cramped but rather comfy room. "Spike I need you to stay here while I go for a little shopping." Spike obeyed and flipped on the television.

Rarity loved traveling through the streets of Canterlot, if she did not have any ties with Ponyville, she would live her life as the fasionable pony she dreamed of bieng. Rarity took her time looking through the shops and stands throughout the streets, the atmosphere of gentle colts and fancy mares made her feel as if she were home. Soon enough she made it to Dragonquill's jewelry store; it was known for holding the most rarest of gems in all of Equestria. Many of the gems grabbed Rarity's attention. The excitement overcame her, every shelves filled with sparkling diamonds, bright rubies, and vast amounts of pretty stones. “I never seen such amazing trinkets and necklaces since I’ve been to the Crystal Kingdom." Rarity thought; her attention lingered towards the store clerk, slowly remembering about the gem. “Oh, your decor is so much more impressive since the last time I came here. Dragonquill you wouldn’t happen to have some Bright Sapphire Gems would you?" The store clerk hesitated

"I would certainly like to help, but (edit) already ran out of Sapphire. I have another shipment coming in about two weeks. Could I interest you in some ruby?"
"Thanks, but I need that gem for this silk I am making," she sighed. "Well this is only one shop, I'm sure I can find it somewhere else, thanks again for your time." The white unicorn did feel disappointed after she left the shop, but still determined. Canterlot had plenty of jewelry shops, although as many as there were Rarity could not find the gem she was looking for. There was no other choice; if she could not find the gem then the trip to Canterlot would have been a waste. Rarity desperately asked for help finding that gem, she begged, cried, and even pouted to the random civilians of Canterlot. It was now getting to the end of the night, with a good nights rest Rarity will look for the gem again. She headed back to the hotel, as Rarity walked in she sensed great danger.The door hung open and the room was trashed. signs of violence filled around the room. Immediately she called out for Spike. She called repeatedly hoping to hear her beloved dragon again. She investigated the room and found a note laying on the top of the hotel’s bed. “Bring us the Bright Sapphire Gem, or you will never see your friend again.” The rest of the note had a sentenced spelled with missing words. The code will not be hard to crack, although all Rarity could think about was Spike. How will she break the news to Twilight? Who are these ponies and and why do they want the gem? How is Spike, they better not have hurt him. Rarity wanted to panic, but Spike is out there somewhere. ”I’m so sorry Spike; I should have let you tag along with me instead of making you stay in this dreadful place. As Celistia’s witness I will get you back Spike no matter the cost!”

Author's Note:

This is just a tiny experiment im working on for now. this may have plenty of spell errors and grammar derps, but I promise to fix any issues regarding this fic

Comments

[OmniFox]

Her beloved dragon? She does care!!!

[Styrofoam]

This is not bad. Not bad at all.

There were a few grammar and "wall of text" issues, but it wasn't like I couldn't read it.

Also it's best to start a new paragraph whenever there is a new speaker, like so:

Using her telekinesis, Rarity opened the paper and began to read. "A Special Gold Silk by next week, who in Equestria needs silk at such short notice, uhh I despise being rushed, don't you agree opal?" The pet kitten rolled its eyes in response. "Spike get your quill ready we have a list to write." Spike nodded in return as he pulled out his scroll and quill, Rarity levitated her supplies neatly near a corner. "Do you think Twilight, would mind if I borrowed you for the rest of today? I do need the extra hand."

Spike replied "Oh don't worry about Twilight; she wont even know I'm gone, she's been to busy practicing a new spell for Celestia. So what do we need?"

Rarity put a hoof under her chin before she spoke. "In order to make this special gold silk, I need to go to Canterlot for the Bright Sapphire Gem. Come along Spike, lets head over to the train."

It just makes reading it better. I'm not grammar-Nazi-ing your fic. I like it, and I just wanna leave some tips.

[TEK101]

I'm not sure if the story line particularly interests me, but I will continue reading just to see. It is hard not to appreciate a story, especially when I consider I don't feel like writing. good luck with the rest!